Musings of a blank mind......

My Last Post...

2008-12-23T18:07:00.000+05:30

Yes...you heard it right...this is my last post...but wait, I don't like to disappoint you either. This is just the last post on this blog. I have moved on...and hence a new blog...All the posts from this blog and couple of others blogs have been imported to my new blog. It's more than just movies, I have put some poetry written by me...some travelogues, book reviews, issues that make me think and a lot more. Things are just starting to catch up with reality and as I grow up, I guess I end up thinking a lot more these days. Here's the address of my new blog....titled..."Life of Something Like It."
New Blog: http://hemanth-cr.blogspot.com/
For the benifit of those who have been reading this blog continuously, there's a link on the new blog which lists posts only on movies...
Movie Link: http://hemanth-cr.blogspot.com/search/label/Poetry
Hope, you will continue supporting and encouraging me as you have over the past year. As we step into a new year...it promises to be one hell of a roller coaster. Looking at the brighter side of things...things will just start getting bigger and better. And as a great author puts it...Everything around us can be summarized in three words..."Life Goes On".
Signing Off,
Hemanth

Where were you?

2008-10-01T17:12:00.002+05:30

Far across a land, I had never been to,

There was a treasure which was a legend.

Some said it was the creation of God,

And others that it was the Holy Grail of our times.

Deep in the dungeon of my life I was trapped,

Where the only concern was to be or not to be,

Some said the only way to break free was a quest,

And others opined that it would be foolish to go on a wild goose chase.

Then one day, I saw a moon kissing the star,

It left me wondering how the moon touched the star.

And it struck me that life’s just an illusion,

Sometimes it lets you walk on water,

And sometimes sucks you deep within.

I had resolved that the only way out of this trap was a quest,

To a land far away that existed only in legends and in my dreams.

I ran…ran and ran…to a place where earth touched the sky.

But that never came so I kept running.

I asked someone if they knew about the treasure,

And they told me a secret that none had known before.

One after the other the secrets kept tumbling out,

And what was once a legend was now a princess who was wilting with seasons.

When the palace where you were was insight,

There were no dragons and fires to scare me away…

Just a single long tunnel to across,

And I saw you on the other end of it…waiting for someone.

All I had to do was to cross the tunnel,

But little did I realize that those would be the most difficult steps I would take!

The demons of my past kept pulling me behind,

But that wouldn’t stop me going towards my glory of my future…inch by inch.

And today after all these years, I stand before you,

And wonder if I could touch you,

I couldn’t move an inch further because I was blinded,

Blinded by a beauty that was only in legends…a beauty which was a creation of God!

I shed a drop of tear out of happiness,

And something happened…something no one had told me before.

The flowers around bloom as if it was spring,

The lamps lit all by themselves and slowly darkness vanished…

As I stood agape to what had happened around, I see you lifting your face,

And there it was….the smile!

So, then we hold our hands and look into your eyes,

The pearls which had me rolling towards life,

And ask…”Where were you when the moon kissed the star?”

And you reply…”I was wondering how did the star touch the moon?”

And I smile as I lay my arms around you and gaze at the moon and the star kissing each other…again!

Wag the Dog!

2008-05-26T15:42:00.002+05:30

For someone, who looks up to the world of cinema as a form of liberation, an expression of a feeling so profound which can move you to tears and inspire, a form of art which is as beautiful as music and painting, there’s one thing going on in my mind…What is wrong with the new generation of film makers who have a reputation of churning out blockbuster movies? I have almost given up on Hindi flicks, except maybe for some few directors and actors whom I believe have some sense left in them to make a good cinema. It’s been ages since I have seen a movie which made me belief that Hindi movies can make the difference in someone’s perception of what Cinema should be like (perhaps, my last favourite was “Taare Zameen Par”). And Hollywood keeps my hope alive…but that’s not what I am worrying about.

The contention here is about the Telugu Film Industry a.k.a Tollywood. It's today one of the biggest regional language film Industry, maybe only second to Hindi. There was a time, when almost every other movie had something to look upto. Flicks those were true to their plots which are quite unlike the today’s genre of potpourris of God knows what all, those flicks of the golden era are definitely a thing of the past. What we see today, is producers and directors simply catering to the needs (read as demands) of the audience. Well, obviously a question arises at this point…is it detrimental to do something like that? It’s a very subjective point of view, but what is interesting to see is that, there seems to be a general opinion among my generation that there is something missing…and that is the “Awesomeness” which we experience sometime or the other while watching a good flick. Perhaps it wouldn’t take too much time in understanding such trite plots and over the top sentiments! To sum it up it’s almost like everyone’s is induced to “Lemon Law” the flick right after 10 mins into the plot (Inspired from Barney’s Law from the sitcom “How I Met Your Mother”)!!!...

What’s even more flabbergasting to see is how film makers boast about the production values and hell a lot of things like acting, songs, characterization and yada..yada. After going through some grueling hours in PVR, Prasads, IMAX over the past several months sitting through some of the so called Blockbusters…I can only show pity on me. For one, I don’t really know why I keep going week after week and spending a fortune on something like that…maybe I still have some hope left in me that someday, someone would surprise me with a good flick! I am having serious thoughts about watching a flick just for the reputation that the director commends or those who constitute my favourite protagonists. I think, I can only blame the unknown for all this, can’t really point out any particular person in the industry….but atleast I hope someday someone would read this earnest plea of this movie buff…

1. For Heaven’s sake, somebody move away from 6 songs, 5 fights (or whatever the number maybe), comedy and sentiment which look terribly out of place! I can’t help to not observe this phenomenon that certain scenes of comedy and sentiment in most of the plots are shoved in to please certain sections of the audience.

2. The budding directors of today’s era who have a great talent to make it big, could also fiddle with the idea of making the length of the movie to just 90 or 100 minutes. It not only adds effect but also saves time for almost everyone. It’s very difficult to please all sections of the audience all at the same time and if not handled properly the results are there to see in zillion movies around.

3. And someone please….please chop off the so called “item songs”! It’s been sometime since it only adds to the burden of having to withstand all this…of course they do the job of pulling the crowd and giving great publicity, but come to think of it, we are on the verge of creating another Jayamalini and Jyothilaxmi today. If the producers believe that people want change everytime and that’s why zillion new female leads are introduced, then why not even in the “Item Songs” front??!

4. I really don’t know what constitutes a blockbuster, but if it’s just money which makes or breaks a flick, then how do you fit good cinema into the bill?! (My definition of a good cinema is something which can be applaudable sincerely from the bottom of your heart. And something which you can watch over and over and over again….for the overall aura which the flick creates and not just because it’s the flick of your favourite actors/actresses). So, please give art a chance to find its place! It’s rather pleasing to watch a flick which you feel difficult to understand or something which is different from the rest, than to watch something which makes you feel all the more stupid! (Wouldn’t you agree on that?!)

5. You gotta give credit...quite literally! Credit to the countless flicked tunes, scenes, even plots! Just a simple mention of this at the end of the movie or in interviews would give credibility to the flick, in the sense that atleast those who have seen the original would want to check out how the Tollywood's take on it is! Right now, the situation is that, instead of listening to the tunes or watching the film, atleast the me is trying to remember the original version...(one of the recent blockbuster reminded me of 5 different movies! Of course a lot many of you might have observed it too).

To conclude this monologue which I have been trying to frame in my mind, I do realize that I am not the only one living around to watch movies, and also it’s not me on whom the outcome of the flick depends on. But an idea, a notion is as immortal as life itself. Right from the moment it germinates in someone’s dream it takes an enormous form and someone is bound to put some life into it. It’s bound to have a domino effect and one day finally changing into a conclusive action. If only, we are lucky enough to see some of this change in the near future…. Wouldn’t you agree that one thing inspires the other? In fact that’s what makes us so progressive. Few days ago, one of the directors of the film Industry wrote an open letter in one of the websites that the film makers are entirely aware of what they are doing, and that there’s no point in voicing opinions which usually doesn’t result in anything. Well, he has a point with what he says. But I am of this staunch opinion that any phenomenon will not last forever. There will be a day when the dog will no longer wag the tail, instead it will be the tail which will wag the dog!

The history of Tollywood like that of Bollywood has been undergoing a sort of cycle every 10-15 years. From showcasing the early years of Independence, then to the social revolution, added to this a lot of Family Drama with plots revolving around the bonding within the family, and finally to that of Love and Action. I am not sure if we are still in the era of Love and Action, it certainly seems so, but nowadays with things changing faster than ever, I can see a paradigm shift soon in the offing.Who takes the first step forward remains to be seen! Someone’s gotta understand that whatever has happened so far and what’s been going on, will one day push us into a feeling of void, if it continues. A hunger for something fulfilling will emerge and it’s bound to spread like a plague, because we no longer live in a society where people are alienated from one another. If everyone thinks that the purpose of films is to just entertain, then it does have a serious competition from countless other things. My humble request as I get ready for the upcoming releases would be, maybe you cannot escape the Murphy’s Law, but you can definitely try not to be Lemon Law’ed.
Suit Up! No...No...That should be “Think Suit Up!“

When NEWS is not from N.E.W.S....

2008-05-13T11:15:00.002+05:30

"Earth has only 4 more years left!" "Khali shows his muscles and 100people faint!" " yet another twist in the "slapgate" scandal" Breaking News:-"Cheerleaders are worse than Bar Dancers" "Thousands line up in streets to see the XYZ of Bollywood…"….Blah…blah…blah…blah…blah.

No, am not trying to promote the self-proclaimed audacity of "anti-blah-blah channel"; but news like this is a common sight. Almost 24 hours a day some or the other channel in around 200 channels that we have in India indulge in the utter stupendous nonsensical stupidity!If you are wondering what exactly I am referring to, then please switch on to a leading Hindi news channel which has the "distinction"of being the best for the past several years. (I have serious doubts on how they proclaim themselves as the best, although I would save that discussion for another day.) The latest fad, or should I call"Breaking News" is that the Earth will come to an end on 21stDecember, 2012. I have no problem when the world is coming to an end,but the oddity in this news is the way things are generated and thesheer impulsiveness of the host in coming to almost over the topbizarre conclusions. Coming back to this report, according to theanalysis of the drawings/paintings found in North America by the erstwhile Mayans claims that the Earth will come to an end in another 4 years.(the first loophole in this happened to be the way, the Mexican pyramids were located while telecasting them in this channel, I could never in my dreams think that Mayans were somewhere close to Hudsonriver!!! Maybe they did...Have to google it sometime..:) ) The then Mayan astrologists had predicted that the age of the present sun is about 5000 odd years and that it will come to an end in 2012 which will then give rise to a new civilization. Sounds like the story of "Stargate", like movies to me….:) . Another twist in the story is that, this is the 5th Sun that we have in our solar system.

To prove this already bizarre finding, the channel brings in a current age astronomer (or was he an Astrologer!??) . I think, he must have been in a fix to keep his version in tandem with the channels' content. And he came up with evenbizarre version of the "Judgment Day". According to him, our solar system will pretty close to the centre of our Milky Way Galaxy and since there is a black hole in the centre, everything is bound to be sucked in. WTF!!!!...This surely is a reason for us to be worried about….but will sense prevail on humanity (read as people who religiously follow the content of this channel) remains to be seen. I mean, someone give this chap and the channel a "NOBELest Prize" for making the discovery of a lifetime. WTF was NASA or ESA doing if we are going to have such a calamity sometime soon. Or is it possiblethat the superpowers have kept mum on this issue to avoid any possible chaos??

Possibly a good example of sensationalism and Yellow Journalism, the channel can be credited with some of the most bizarre things explainedwith all the possible intricacies on primetime. Hold on now, the so called "anti- blah-blah" channel is also not far behind. A partner in crime, it is a haven for page-3 kinda stories (and again debating that likes of page-3 is bringing immorality and destroying the Indian"sanskriti"..) and creating icons out of nothing. Take the WWE wrestler for example, almost an hour or two is dedicated for himeveryday, and the channels just seem to be following him day and night! Shouldn't be a problem, when you can withstand the likes of Sawants, Khans hogging the entire limelight on TV, but is it that important to explain what he eats, wears, thinks, does…..crap!Somebody drive sense to people who think this is worthy enough, but I am nobody to blame or pass a judgment. It's again a moral debate todebate what's good and what's not? But my humble request is to thinkbefore putting the content on TV, there might be zillion better thingsthat could be shown on TV. The same goes on for zillion Regional Channels....it's better to stop transmission of the channel than to rather fill it with crappiest of things...but again am nobody to pass on a judgement. Which is why I switch on to a movie channel everytime such things are highlighted as "BREAKING NEWS"....:-P

On the Rocks...

2008-03-26T11:53:00.016+05:30

Over the past few days, I had been wondering if I could get a good long break from work. And thanks to the timely coincidence of my completion of training, along with Holi, Good Friday, my prayers had been answered. I was finally out of the hullabaloo of having to run along with everyone and try to prove that you are still worth it to stick to your work every single day on some or the other pretext. A friend of mine from college, Harsha informed me that he was planning a weekend trip to Hampi and asked if I could join him and others who were planning to go. This buddy had quite a few things to rave about from his previous trip to the west coast few months ago, so I thought, maybe I should tag along with him….it all sounded so exciting. A group travelling to a place where most of us hadn’t been to before, on the banks of a river and a haven for foreigners who are on a trip across India. And I was game for it….

Finally on the D-day, 5 of us ended up travelling to Hampi, two of us from Bangalore and the rest from Hyderabad. This post is a chronicle of our journey to the city of Victory which over the years has been christened as City of Ruins….Hampi.

March 22, 2008

Morning: 6:00 AM

Me and Arun reached the town of Hospet which was 13 kms away from Hampi. After 5 months in Hyderabad, and 5 months in Bangalore, this small town looked like some other world!...so serene atleast in those wee hours. After 30 minutes, we got the first bus to Hampi and 2 kms away from Hospet we realized that we left behind the umbrella behind in the bus stand at Hospet, so it was later decided that my friend would go back to get that. The journey to Hampi was quite a smooth one…it literally reminded me of my village, those small roads, fields on either sides with occasional small little canals and the aroma of the dusk and the firewood. It makes one feel as if this was such an important thing that lot many of us have been missing for a long time!....

After about 8 kms from Hampi, the detour to Hampi starts and after couple of villages and lot of Plantain plantations you get the first glimpse of huge boulders….and then their count keeps on increasing. Finally, after almost 30 mins of drive from Hospet in the bus, we reached Hampi. Have to say some impressive structures greet you at the entrance of the town, among them are the Krishna and the Ganesha Temple. And that was my first impression of the place….quite difficult to understand the beauty of it! Should we look at it that it’s still standing even after 500 years of negligence…or appreciate the beauty and glory that once stood there….I was sure that I wouldn’t get answer to this question and ended up asking myself the same thing more than few times.

7:15 AM… (A little later after Arun went back to Hospet)

“Hello….Rooms sir, 80 rupees, 100 Rs, 120 Rs…rooms sir, just 2 mins walk from here” a tout was screaming (or should I rather say doing his part of the job) at a foreigner. Am pretty sure this sight of an Indian shouting at him would have knocked him out, the gentleman regained his senses and replied with a simple smile that he knows where he has to go. That’s when he took out his guide cum encyclopedia….Lonely Planet’s guide to India!!!....This was like a bible, a must in the hands of every foreigner who was laying his foot there (ahh…someone really said it right. Books are indeed your best friends!) And over the next 1 hour, found out that the number of foreign travelers to this place out number the Indians by a huge margin. I had never been to such a place, so was kinda expecting this one to be quite different from any of the ones that I had seen or been to before.

8:30 AM:

Arun comes back to Hampi along with his ‘lucky’ umbrella. We found out where our friends from Hyderabad, Ranga and Harsha were and set out in that direction. The thing with Hampi is, you can never really understand it’s beauty unless you explore it completely. One side it’s full of boulders, almost giving the entire place a barren look and immediately beyond those boulders in the Thungabhadra river surrounding which are beautiful agricultural fields. And Hampi as a whole is divided by this river. In the main town we have the Virupaksha Temple (Lord Shiva’s temple dating back to the 7^th Century A.D, the main deity of the Vijayanagara Empire), the Vittala temple, monolithic bull , the main ruins and loads of places to eat and shop. And the other part of the town is cut across by the river and is aptly called the Hampi Island or The Other side of River. This part has lot of guest houses and few houses for the tourists to stay over for sometime. After the 2 minute boat ride to the Island, we guys met each other at this serene place named…”The Goan Corner”. Quite a popular spot for the foreigners, this place is perhaps neglected by many because of its distance from the main river, but after going to this place, you will realize that the same distance works out in its favour!!! A perfect get away from a busy life, this place had all the basic amenities to spend a memorable holiday. We guys were again perhaps the only Indians in that corner, but thanks to a pervious visit by a couple of us, we were known faces there! And since it being the eve of Holi, everyone was game for putting some enthu…we guys joined the celebration along with our fellow tourists [;)]...(hehehe……evil grin!!..:P)

11:00 AM

Our first visit around Hampi kicked off on a moped towards the village, Anegondi which apparently was the actual capital of the Vijayanagara empire before it was moved to Hampi. Travelling across the countryside under dark clouds and cool breeze is like having a beautiful dream…you do want to last longer, but the moment the climax comes you miss the ending. Here too…you want this thing to go on forever, but somewhere down the line, either we move far away from it, or it just stays of figment of one’s imagination. After reaching Anegondi, we realized that there were couple of temples in that part and nothing what we had expected to see….but to our surprise, we came across the unfinished bridge across Tungabhadra. (Some of you might have seen it, it was aired in one of the episodes of Roadies…). After some heavy showers and getting drenched, we crossed the river in a coracle…quite an experience.

1:00 PM

A little further down the road, started out tryst with the ruins. First was the Tallargatta Gate, and after some heavy posing for the camera we were on our way to the town of Kamalapura. On the way we were guided to a temple which was on top of a small hill. From outside, I wondered why someone would build such a huge temple so far away from the village or town amidst these boulders. The boulders seemed to have a story to tell, each one of them strangely arranged to give an unmistakable identity. Actually along with the lighting around under overcast conditions, it turned out to be a photographer’s dream! The temple was on its way of neglect and it remains to be seen, how long it’s going to sustain. But am sure even at that stage, it will continue to remain puzzling to those around as to how exactly someone could build it so close to the rocks. According to a legend, Rama and Lakhsmana took rest at this hill while they were on their way searching Sita and hence a temple. Probably this one temple would be more memorable to us to some thrills for some stunning camera work by Harsha!...Here’s one such pic from the gallery…

4:00 PM

We were on our way back to Hampi and the other side of river with a lot more to explore for the next day. Completely drenched along with some holi colours, the day was a good starter for what was in store for us!...

7:00 PM

“What do you do?”…”I do nothing man…”…..(heavy laughing in one corner)….”Look at him dude…he’s too lost!!”…(more laughter!)….Five of us sharing a jumbo…and then down to three trying out the missilistic pan!...[:P]….”It was like nothing….It’s awesome…it’s like nothing….indescribable”….”Check that chick out….I think that dude is hitting on her….”….”awww…comeon guys, lets leave”….

That was how the day ended on a extremely “high” note, it surely was going to remain in our memories baring the last 3 hours before hitting the sack!...[:P]…

Next Day…March 23rd. Sunday

9:00 AM:

I was woken up by a random lost drop of rain which managed to sneak in through the thatched roof. And after sometime, all of us pulled ourselves together and bade goodbye to “Goan Corner” and its wonderful host Sharmila…and “Vicky”!!!...(phew!!!...I so wanna go back there now!!...[:P]) and all those foreigners with whom we had shared little moments of joy. After crossing the river, we turned towards the “Mango Tree Restaurant”. This place is easily one of the best hangouts in Hampi…located in a Mango Orchid, the place offers a magnificent view of the island and the river. And on a rainy day it’s a different story altogether. Perfect place to spend as much time as possible just staring at things around….all the serenity!

11:30 AM

This time we took some better bikes to explore the ruins of the Vijayanagara Empire. We started off with a Ganesha and Krishna temple followed by an underground Shiva Temple little further down the road. Just at the back of this temple is the main part….something which stood once for its glory and the legend that gold, diamonds, rubies were once sold in huge quantities in its streets…the ruins. It’s actually unbelievable that a 600 years old thing could come down like that…and all that remains were some walls here and there and basement of what would have once existed. Thanks that this place was declared as a UNESCO heritage site, otherwise God knows what all we would have lost by now. There were ruins of what would have been a busy street, lots of public baths, temples, mosques (those kings were secular too!!), bazaars, elephant stables, even a minting place. Spanning 59,000 sq mts, this huge complex of remaining basements and other pillars is a site worth exploring. Maybe you could get into a game, guessing what activity could have been in which street and things like that. The most impressive of all is the Durbar, which is a three-tier structure, offering a panoramic view of the whole area. Adjacent to this are the Hazara Rama Temple and the Stepped Tank…both of them stand as an example of the lavish Dravidian Architectural style. What’s disturbing at first was to find no idols in any of the temples that we had been to in the ruined city. Later we realized that the subsequent conquerors post 1565 must have destroyed them or they could have been stolen over the years post the downfall of the Vijayanagara Empire…

3:00 PM

We were still hanging out in that place and trying to explore more things, the stepped tank was beautiful and the water transport system to this place was interesting to watch! This is where rain eventually caught up with us and along with it, brought some stunning variety of clouds consisting of a beautiful mélange of azure and black. Should say, it’s really difficult to say whether we were chasing the clouds or vice versa. Everywhere we went, as Harsha puts it…was ”A Wallpaper Material”…and thanks to Ranga’s SLR and Harsha’s thrills, the shots have come out brilliantly….here’s a small glimpse of it…Both these pics were shot within a gap of 10 minutes, so you can imagine how things were that day...

4:30 PM

Our last tryst with the Vijayanagara Empire culminated with the Queen’s palace and the Elephant stables. This complex also has a Lotus Mahal, which is constructed in the Indo-Ismalic style. It was a bit disappointing that only it’s style of architecture was described in almost all these places. This makes it a little difficult to understand the significance of each structure (A guide along with you would help a lot!!!). I remembered that Hampi was quite famous for its Stone Chariot and we found out that it was in the Vittala Temple couple of kms away from Hampi on the banks of the river. But we couldn’t reach it on time…that place closes down at 5:30 PM!!!...[:(]

6:00 PM

A visit back to Mango Tree Restaurant to laze around a bit…and 5 of us sat there staring at the orange sun going down the horizon, the motor boat going silent….little bulbs glowing across the river and life coming to a stand still…..peace…eternal peace…

It was just 2 days of trip to this place which we thought was gonna be blazing hot! But it took us totally by surprise with the overcast conditions; I think it added more to the glamour of this place and the rain!!...Rain and its unpredictability…. Would say, it was a perfect trip for 2 days and life seemed so different…it’s like you have no clue what you would do next, but you always knew that this was your view for a perfect outing…or rather a Perfect Life!... I wish I could have captured that serenity, that music of the river dancing down the rocks, the vision of the ruins which speak a lot for themselves. I know I cannot do that….but some pictures would serve as an alternative to remind me of that wonderful time. And I believe, every time I close my eyes and try to remember few things related to fun and happiness, these 2 days would come back again and again…I haven’t traveled much, but of the little I have, I would put this one in the bracket of the finest I have ever been to….I guess this was because I was traveling with a bunch of great guys…thanks Harsha, Ranga, Arun and Praneeth!....I so wish everyone from Kastle Vista should have joined us….but anyway, that leaves me a good excuse to go back to this place some other time….and this time, I wish I could stay for more time there…it’s a great place to write…to think…to laze…to ogle[:P]…to do…to get lost in the beauty….to get on a high …..on nature ([:P]). And that’s what I call….Nature, On the Rocks!

Click Here to check out few more pics from the trip on Harsha's Gallery....

The Sea

2008-03-17T18:48:00.000+05:30

There is a saying far in a land unknown,
“A drop of water can be saved forever, only when it is thrown into the sea”
I never knew what that meant,
And I wanted to be saved, for I was one.

I was born on the day when Gods sent me to earth,
Only to be lost in isolated paths of life,
And all through I would stare down at the stream below,
Which filled me with curiosity unknown.

One fine day, I took the plunge of my life,
Drooping from the great tree which held me safely,
Guess What?! That was the most adventurous thing I had done,
And the hills of my land couldn’t stop talking about the one, who took the wrong turn.

I couldn’t see where I was heading,
But met millions like me all the way,
And saw million eyes filled with hope and dreams,
But all had one thing in common, the will to reach the sea!

Holding and pushing ourselves downstream,
I looked up into the heaven to see if I could find my home?
All I could see were the clouds obscuring the little possible I could see.

For some reason, I felt lost and stopped for a while;
And when I looked back I could see a trail behind,
A proof that I had lived my life and made others follow.

It brought a smile on my little face,
And wondered how others see their lives as?
I asked,” O! My friend. which part of heaven are you from?”
He smiled and said, I don’t know, I am yet to find one.
And I knew, we would all eventually, in the sea!

The sea, made of millions like me,
Outwitting, outclassing those around,
It is this sense of struggle which keeps us going,
And I don’t know where to stop…where to end this journey.
When that happens, I know that I am saved forever, I am immortal…

And that part of heaven is called the sea,…made of millions like me,
Outwitting…outclassing each other to leave a trail for others to follow….

---Hemanth Kumar

(Written on 22/2/2008)

This one was written on my Birthday...22/2/2008...for all my friends...[:)]

THE MASK

2008-03-17T18:47:00.003+05:30

think I cried the moment I was born,
But I still wonder how I brought smile back to the faces forlorn,
What kind of world have I entered?
Where ones sadness is another’s happiness.

Years later when I could walk and think on my own,
I realized that things are way too different than what they seem,
And to see them you need for yourself a mask,
It gives you an identity alien before.

And now I have many in my closet,
One for Monday and another for Tuesday,
I always have a smile and appear full of hope,
After all it’s a great way to start a week and kick start the race.

They wear out sooner than one can think of,
And I take out another two, one for Wednesday and another for Thursday,
I look all worked up and desperate for some break,
What more can you pray for than some peace of mind?

And they wear out sooner than one can think of,
Only 2 are left, one for Friday and another for Saturday,
What more can I ask for? I look as if I was born yesterday,
All I could think of was some fun and some frolic.

And I ran out of masks,
Thank Goodness, I didn’t have to wear any at least for one day,
The world looks so different without a disguise,
Everything’s so pure and exists in solitude and solace.

But who’s this in the mirror?
I have never seen him, though it’s me standing in front of the mirror,
I tried to draw my picture, but got lost in the contours of my face,
They keep changing, probably getting ready for the week ahead.

I wish I could throw away my masks,
And all those fake expressions and acts of purposeful existence,
But where would I stand devoid my mask?
It’s my identity and maybe my way of life…

And I open my closet to choose the mask for the day,
To go back to my existence and keep my life and conscience at fray,
To walk into oblivion and be one among you,
And keep believing that one day all of this would come to an end…

Reminiscence

2008-03-17T18:47:00.001+05:30

The streets are too desolate to imagine,
And so are the coffee shops around the corner,
Why am I walking on the road at this hour?
Darkness is all around and there is no light ahead.

I sat in the coffee shop for a drink,
The aroma of Chocolate was captivating,
Where have I come this day?
The scent of flowers reminds me of days past.

I used to gaze around and wonder where life was running,
The spring at that time was at its best,
On one fine day I ran into you,
And life was never the same again.

When blink of the eye was a moment wasted,
What more could I do to think about you?
I so wish I had the power to stop time,
Maybe then I can find a rhythm to my life’s hymn.

I followed your steps and took the same lanes,
It’s a wonder that I could never lose your sight,
How could I? I saw you everywhere I went,
And one find day I could tell what was dream and what reality…

I look at myself in the mirror,
And wonder whom I am seeing,
I lost my features….my identity,
Haven’t looked this good till now, and I don’t even know since when?!

And I ran to see you again,
To tell you that my dawn begins with a glimpse of your smile,
And ends when I can see you no longer,
To tell you that you have filled the void in my life,
And I can no longer stay alone!
I ran…and I kept running…

The world is a small place to hide,
But what do I do with this splinter in my mind,
How long would I have to run to find you?
I can’t see you, but I keep thinking maybe you are around,
I keep hoping that one day you will make me a part of your life…
And I keep running towards that day…thinking…hoping…..

One Step Wayward...

2008-03-17T18:46:00.003+05:30

The wheel spun faster than I thought,
And the day was just beginning to wake up,
Clear road ahead, and our gusto fraught,
Oh passerby, did you see the strangers who hit the road?

The ball of fire was too mellowed down,
And what a spectacle was that!
We stared directly into the Sun,
And felt like He was warming up for his routine!

The boulevard took us to lands unknown,
Fields in the countryside were fully mown,
But the Sunflowers smiled at us,
I think we were obstructing the Sun at that moment.

The fog cleared away,
And took away with it the solitude around,
The humming of the birds in trees and bustle of men around,
I wonder how things can change in a moment,
For a moment you see what freedom is, what Heaven is,
But then you realize that you are never alone and are still mortal!

Aimless and free of burden, what more could you ask for?
All we were doing was to find out where the road leads us,
And we go on….we go on…
And we would go on till the point where the road ends.

The Sun kept following us all the way,
I think even He got bored and finally hid the Sun behind the mountains,
The darkness wraps around leaving no void,
But still, there is never a moment morbid,
Maybe this is what happens when we stand and stare…

Sometimes a step out of our banal lives changes everything,
You see what you have been missing all the while,
Sometimes a moment well spent works wonders,
It stays on like that forever…memories are so hard to forget!

Sometimes I wonder if we have time for anything.
All we seem to do is run towards the next post,
Unaware of what lies ahead and hopeful of crossing the finish line,
Oh brother, look back, maybe you have missed a step or two…
Where would you run if there’s no road ahead?

Rhyme of the Wind

2008-03-17T18:46:00.001+05:30

Pitter-patter, pitter-patter;
The rhythm of the downpour accentuates the thunder in the clouds,
And the ferocious wind from the sea howls wildly,
I wonder if the Gods are having a fight up in the Heaven;

The rain descends to the ground below,
Flooding the roads and making all life come to a standstill,
Have never seen things around so calm,
I wish it rains like this everyday just to see everything still and soothing,

Alas, I never wished to see few things,
Like logs of wood floating in the sea,
I fear for a ship far from my sight,
Like an infant crying on the street,
I think about the mother, who has lost her child,
Like a leaf flying in the wind,
And I think about the tree turning bare.

This almost sounds like a lullaby,
Or maybe like a rhyme from a Gaelic bard.
The whispers of the breeze are too obstinate,
They fill the hopes and dreams of people of the spring ahead.

I wish the winds bring along with them,
A message from my Knight, who’s far away in a Crusade,
Oh…my Love, Why do you fight so much?
Don’t you see that it doesn’t even matter if you win?
All I want is your blade doesn’t taste more blood than this,
We don’t want to rule over a land of Ghosts!

I wish the rain washes away the blood on the land,
If not, it will always stay as a memoir of a battle once fought,
A battle which changed the course of history,
And turned brothers into Enemies

Oh God of Rain…What are you waiting for?
Unleash your power, and let the clouds drain out every bit,
Let the masks of people be washed away,
Let the disguise of egotism be unveiled,
Perhaps that day, their souls will drop,
Let them repent for what they have done,
And contemplate for what may lie ahead…

Drop in the Rain

2008-03-17T18:45:00.000+05:30

The clouds are too beautiful to describe,
And so is the rainbow spread across it,
I try to catch the glimpse over and over again,
But it just conjures up when I think of it,
Where does it go when I am awake?
I wish I could walk on the clouds and splash across the rain,

On the streets, early in the morning,
I see the birds chirping in oblivion,
I try to look around and come across few,
But I wonder if it’s the same voice that I heard?
The music stays on and so does the aroma of the dawn,
I wish the day goes on like this and wonder what if it doesn’t?

I step out and am lost in the crowd,
I try to find a way out,
And I end up taking a wrong turn in the maze,
There’s no way back and then only hope remains,
Hope that some new turns and ways come on the way,
What would happen if this goes on forever?

I end up taking the same road everyday,
And it leads to the same place,
I wonder where I would be if I had taken the other way,
What makes me turn towards the same turn everyday?
What if something else happens one fine day?
Where would I be on that day?

With the sun setting in the horizon,
I stare at the sky every night,
And wonder why do the stars appear all over the skies?
It doesn’t matter if I end up seeing a different star everyday,
They too end up doing the same thing over and over again,
What makes them different from what we are?
What makes them so beautiful night after night?

What if…what if…
I end up doing nothing and yet, there’s so much to look out for,
Oh…brother, don’t laugh at me; I am not lazy,
I don’t understand why I stand still in the race,
If idleness is boredom, then isn’t work?
If only you could see that there is no point trying to catch up with life,
You go and change the world, and I would stand beside to clap for you,
But the question is…what would you do if you were me?!

The Dawn

2008-03-17T18:44:00.002+05:30

As the valley relishes in its deep slumber,
The mist creeps in and kisses my feet,
I go further into the layers of my quilt,
Too curious I am to know the end of my dream.

I ain’t sure when I woke up,
But am sure that others were still dreaming,
I saw myself in the mirror,
And after too many days to remember, saw myself smile.

I hate the fact that we wake up with the same feeling,
Day after day, year after year it’s the same.
What if something abnormal happens at times?
Like snowing in the middle of summer,
Like flowers blooming in autumn,
Like a feeling that something great is in store for us…

Dew dripping down the trees,
Clouds hanging around searching for a place,
Hills singing in melody for the monsoon,
And we thought that everyday is the same.

Late last night, something exceptional happened,
The hills for the first time in ages had turned white!
Reflecting like a mirror, they shone like silver,
So strong was the glaze that even the Sun closed his eyes.

I kept the morning coffee aside and gazed around,
The aroma of dawn filled my mind,
I can’t help but think, if this isn’t beauty then what is?
If this isn’t bliss then what is?

Dallying and sauntering on the boulevard
Singing with the wind and catching the snow,
I smiled at the Tulips and Roses in my hand,
And there it was…the Sun in its full glory,
For a moment it looked as if heaven had dawned on the hills.

The snow started melting and the drops fell on the rocks,
It’s probably the most soothing sound in the world,
Sounds as if an invisible Mozart at his best!
And what bigger Opera can there be if there are birds chirping along.

The warmth of the Sun set the vale ablaze,
The silence of the night gave way to the din of the day,
And by the time the town was on its feet, snow was gone
Alas it was just another day for most of them!

I am back to my room and thought the day passed too soon,
When would I get to see the snow again?
When would the hills drape in ubiquitous silence again?
I sleep again wishing that I won’t wake up the same way as today
I sleep again wishing that I would smile and hope a great day is in store,
I sleep again…dreaming that there would be another morning…
I sleep again….to see another dawn.

Walking Through Haze...

2008-03-17T18:44:00.001+05:30

Cindrella…o…Cindrella,
What are you waiting for?
Days go on, but you won’t comply…
When shall thou realize the maze?
Up there from the tower,
What do you look for down here?
Miles and miles across,
There’s nothing but emptiness

You can’t move, you can’t shout,
Neither can you smile, nor can you laugh,
Yet you wait for the day to do all that
When shall thou realize that it’s not a matter of time,
But the confluence of you two which will free you.

The knight is too naïve to realize the truth,
He thinks, that there’s no tower on this earth which he has missed,
Yet he can’t find you and he keeps looking,
When shall he decode the enigma?
When shall he break the spell cast by the witch?

The witch was too shrewd and challenged the Knight to the crest,
And what a spell it was, she hid you inside your Knight’s heart!
But here’s the catch …you can’t be free unless one of you die!!!
Either way, it’s a heavy price to pay… my princess.

What if the knight realizes this spell?
I think, he would give his life to set you free,
But if he did, then would you want to be alive?!
So far, so good…no one knows this, neither he nor you.
And the search continues…

Look around Cindrella and you will hear your name rebound!
O Knight, look within she’s there in you,
Let there be no tears, and no fears…
You are bounded for eternity...this is just the other side of the spell.

Come what may, you won’t know this,
And the search continues,
And the day you realize the truth,
Neither of you shall survive.

Keep moving…keep looking, maybe one day you will take the road less traveled,
Maybe you will walk through haze without a clue what’s around
Who knows what you may come across, keep searching…keep walking.

Road to Nirvana

2008-03-17T18:43:00.000+05:30

Just another day in just another town,
Walking, strolling, and dancing in the wind,
I wonder why the sun always rises from the East,
It makes the Sun so predictable!

I see, plenty others staring at Him,
Hoping that He would show some mercy,
I wonder what they lose if their prayers are unheard,
Life goes on like the eternal sun.

I thought my job was perhaps the most banal of all,
And thought, there are thousands of bored people like me,
I saw the Sun and the prayers,
And realized that my life is no different from theirs,
We walk the same road and crisscross in oblivion

What would I be if I wasn’t just another average Joe, with an average job?
What would I do, if I had no reason to work?
What would I do, if I had no reason to live?
What would I do…why should I do anything?

What drives us crazy to do something?
Hope that it will be a better day tomorrow?
Will to succeed and be the best?
Madness to rise above the rest?

I ask my alter-ego who seems to be always happy
Maybe it exists to see another Sunrise, to see another sunset,
To see another smile, to see another tear,
To see another night, to see another moon & stars,
Live on…Live on…Eternity comes before 100!

Am just another ghost, in just another town,
Waiting for the sun to rise to start my day
A day devoid of reason, but ironically, the means to find a reason
If everything is so predictable, then where does the smile or tears come from?

I tell my shadow to follow me,
Too difficult to lay all your egos at rest,
If escaping from yourself is the solution,
Where would you go to live a life?
It’s the same sun, same wind, and same night everywhere.
Madness, confusion, smile, tears, hope, destiny, Oblivion, Chaos, Win, Loss, Conquer, Defeat, Bliss, Innocence, Happiness, Knowledge, Nirvana….

What dreams may come true?

2008-03-17T18:41:00.000+05:30

Far away in the sky,
Came an unlikely guest to peep across the horizon,
A horizon quite unlikely to have taken place
But when it did, nothing could stop it.

The flakes of snow which kissed my cheeks all this time,
seem to have vanished in no time
And the moment the sun came into the picture,
I knew I had a reason to smile.

What does it mean to smile...to chuckle?
I look at the solitary swing in my backyard,
And smile at an era bygone, when there was joy around,
Now, all I do is wonder what and when did things go wrong?

Isolated are the streets and so are my dreams,
I can't think of anything different from what I see,
Images gory pass through my mind,
but i wonder who gives them a reason to occur in first place.

I hold the edges of the threads dangling from my mother's dress,
And think of the days, when this would have been an oddity
that the queen of the house can't maintain the dress properly
But what do I do, I see the awkward silence on her face
And wonder, where did her aura go?

All I hear outside are boots singing in unison,
they remind me of another futile battle,
A battle, where everything is lost after the victory.
It's not the battle for power but of egos

I cry not because I am sad, but to wash the dirt on my face,
I can't think any more and have dreams
But if I am still existing, then maybe there's still some hope left
To see the day, when I can walk down the road without any fear...

I dream to see the sky azure, without any smoke
I dream to fly a kite without a bullet piercing it,
I dream to walk around the bazaar and haggle for everything possible
I dream to sleep everynight without fear
I dream...to dream...and dream...and dream...

First Take

2008-03-17T18:39:00.000+05:30

Everything you are about to read is not fictitious, any resemblance to an event or idea existent or not, is purely intentional and not coincidental. Although, I am just going to write about what I think, and not emphasizing on what one should think.

The following post is a real scenario which came too close to existence but couldn’t in the end. So, everything that I write here is genuine stuff and not a figment of my imagination.

One fine day, I was wondering what’s the best thing to talk about in front of 119 people. Should it be something which everyone understands. Or should it be one which might interest people to actually listen to me?...By the end of the day, it struck me that, maybe I can talk about what I love to talk about if given a chance….Cinema.
Suddenly, my brain put on its thinking cap and tons of incidents, ideas, trivia popped up and I indeed had a lot of stuff to talk about. And for a moment I daydreamt of the scene where I would be talking about this stuff…literally nothing short of Robert Langdon clearing some myth to his students in Da Vinci Code…(Oops…I think that was exaggerated to quite an extent, but I guess you have an idea of how excited I was.)
And the daydream developed into a good script which takes place like this….

“Good Afternoon One and all….My name is Hemanth Kumar and I am from Batch 827 And today I am going to talk about Cinema and its Impact”

“I understand that each one of us understand cinema in a different way, so I would relate my experiences with Cinema and how it has influenced me. Before going any further, I would like to have a close look at this letter from English Alphabet….”i” What all things can you think of when you look at this letter?!
1. 9th letter in the alphabet.
2. The only vowel which exists along with a meaning.
3. The only letter which is giving the same preference as your own Name and even God. Have you ever thought why should we equate ourselves to God?!...or why should the first letter when referring to God should be in caps?!

What I mean to say is, when you can come up so much stuff, so many questions from just one letter, imagine the impact thousands of word would have on you?! If you believe that a picture speaks a thousand words, imagine the impact created by thousands and thousands of images. That’s the amount of information you can convey through cinema…absolutely impeccable, and endless possibilities when you think about it.

Before going ahead, let me define what Cinema means to me through a small story. In some parts of the world, before all the modern techniques came into existence, Gold was extracted in a different method. Hundreds of tons of sand would be processed to extract gold. If man had given up digging for Gold because there was too much sand, maybe we could never have got Gold…for me Cinema is that Gold. So, cinema for me is something which makes an impact…and sand is the stuff which is available in plenty around, sometimes hindering people from differentiating quality stuff from the banality around.

There are two quotes which really inspired me…something which reiterate why it’s great falling in love with movies…

“If photography is truth, then Cinema is Truth 24 times a second”-a quote from the French movie…”Le Petit Soldat”
“Talking about movie, is like talking about Dreams”-Fredrico Felini, Italian director, one of the greatest filmmakers ever.

The process of making an image movie is quite similar to the way, how we as kids used to make cartoons at the top of the page and flip it at one go, it looks as if the action is taking place. Similarly, for every second there are 24 frames (pictures) moved at a go, so that looks like an action.
All of us watch movies for different reasons, some would say it’s just entertainment, some for timepass…and quite a few would agree that it really changes the way you think about things around and life in general. Coming to some of the types of cinema, there do exist quite a number of types of cinema, prominent among them are the Commercial cinema and the Parallel cinema. And these can be divided further on the basis of the genres that they fall under...like Action, Drama, Romance…etc.

In my view, people who make commercial cinema understand what people want to see and Parallel Cinema, expects the audience to think and try to understand what the director wants to convey. Most of the times, they literally put you off to sleep…so, it really a test of your patience and your interest in cinema. Personally I like parallel cinema, because I tend to relate the protagonists to people around me and most of the times I find that people don’t sing, dance like what’s shown in commercial cinema…and they are not some superheroes either. Most of the times, Parallel cinema is quite successful in portraying people in different shades where they have feelings quite similar to how you and I feel.

What makes Cinema such an interesting thing is its power to reach a wider audience and also make people aware of several issues like War, Genocide, Racism in places where it is not known. There are plenty of movies which deal with issues related to war…like few of the WWII movies which depict the atrocities by Nazis (have to say, that’s just a part of the greater picture associated with war) and you have loads of documentaries which bring the views from inside…for example, Farenheit 9/11, Sicko, The Inconvenient Truth etc. There are few other great movies which have been adaptations from great books, plays. People surprise you with their view of life…someone like Stanley Kubrick, Andrei Tarkovsky, Ingmar Bergman (these people are adept at depicting traits like loneliness, spirituality, Dark comedies…etc).

Let me take you back to my past, maybe you will get an idea about how this passion for movies started. In Andhra Pradesh, we have a great culture with respect to movies. Every festive season there are tons of movies released, there was a time when we would end up watching everything. This phenomenon transformed to Passion for cinema 15 years later. And I realized how much I had fallen in love with movies in college. Should say it had made me more and more interesting towards things other than books and grades. And I am deeply indebted to it for this. On the flipside, if I have to say, about the not so good things…I became a couch potato, am 84kilos right now and deeply confused about what I am doing right now….But would also add that I know clearly what I love the most, and what I would do few years down the lane.

People always ask me how I get so much stamina to watch movies (I am not exaggerating, the average count was around 3-4 movies per day at one point of time…). The answer is…. I don’t know, probably we don’t mind spending time for something which we love to do. Foreign Cinema, especially that from Europe has made me realize the power and outreach of great cinema. Directors like Bergman, Felini, Pedro Almodovar, Roman Polanski and loads of others from France have redefined my perspective of cinema. Their take on themes that are difficult to comprehend and satirical subjects create an impact which only few can understand; which makes the very point of watching all their so called “philosophical” and “boring” movies so interesting and demanding to watch. It’s like having to talk to a person whom you don’t want to talk to. But after sometime, you tend to look for ways to like that person. And when you do fall in love with that person, you wonder how could you think the way you earlier were thinking? Watching a great movie makes me feel like that. And foreign cinema…the more you watch it, I sometimes feel that the more original themes seem. It’s like eating ice-creams…first you would try having all the flavours and then decide which one you like more. For me, foreign cinema is an untouched flavour.

A bit about Indian Cinema, it has come a great way from Alam Ara to Shree 420, from Mughal-E-Azam to Sholay to Lagaan. What’s most interesting about the trend in Indian Cinema is the effect of the Indian psyche or the conditions in the society which have been adapted so well in many of the movies. The movies which came in the decade after Independence had a huge influence of the prevalent conditions like fight for land, hunger, man vs machines and so on. Some of the best examples for this kind of genre are….Do Bheega Zameen, Mother India, Naya Daur. And then came Mughal-E-Azam, by far such grandeur hasn’t been achieved in Indian Cinema History (perhaps Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s Devdas might come close…but considering that Mughal-E-Azam is from 60’s, it has an upper hand). This film took 9 years to finish, some 4000 horses, 8000 troops were used for the war scenes. Also one of the first Indian Films to have a song in Colour (Jab Pyar Kiya tho Darna Kya?), it was a commercial BlockBuster, and one of the very few films which was granted a theatrical release in Pakistan. In the year 1975, another film took the nation by storm, Sholay. Never in the history of the cinema would people end up loving everything associated with the movie. Dialogues would last for eternity and so will the action and emotion. 80’s brought along with it themes like fight for justice, socialism and also the influence of emergency was clearly evident. 90’s was dominated by Romance and we had films like DDLJ stand up for more than a decade. Then in 2001, a film came which turned cinema halls in Cricket Stadiums, Lagaan. Never had a movie captured the imagination of the entire nation the way Lagaan had done. Eventually it was nominated for Oscars and was one of the five finalists. And no list of classic movies is complete without the mention of directors like Satyajit Ray, Adoor Gopalakrishnan and a host of others from Malayalam and West Bengal.

Cinema is also a great medium to bring forth issues to a wider audience. One of the best examples could be stated is that of Marlon Brando. When he had won the Oscar for his role in Godfather, he sent a little known actress named Sacheen Littlefeather who was dressed in the Red Indian Style. And he wrote a letter which she read out to the august audience, the reasons why he wasn’t present on the occasion, and also his objections to the depiction of Native Americans by Hollywood and Television. In 1915, D.W.Griffith came up with a movie “Birth of a Nation” about white supremacy and interracial relationships. Although, it had a bit of negative impact on the society at large, it was also responsible for the resurrection of Ku Klux Klan.

With the advent of new technology and also internet, piracy movie marketing, distribution and advertising have taken the centre stage. There was a time when we had to wait for 6 months, sometimes even a year for an English movie, but the trend changed with Matrix Revolutions, the movie released worldwide on a single day. In India, Reliance came up with a strategy where the movies could be telecasted through satellite. What this means is, cinema halls in rural and remote areas wouldn’t have to wait for longer time to watch a movie…they can simply order a movie within a week of release and it will be telecasted. Also movie merchandising and distribution with the entry of huge corporate houses has helped the production houses rake in huge profits.

There’s a famous debate on whether “Life imitates art or Art imitates Life?” Whatever maybe the case, the ultimate aim of a film should be to influence and make an impact. We have more than 6 billion people across the world. And each one of them have a different story to tell, a different point of view of life…which means at any point of time, we must have more than 5 billion stories….so, it’s crap to say that we don’t have enough films…either you haven’t come across enough or you haven’t made an effort to catch a flick. I would like to conclude this session with a brief mention of my transitions in life. I call it the CD transition. When I was a kid, C stood for Cat and D for Dog. After few years, C was for Cool, and D for Drinks. In college, C stood for Compact and D for Disks. And now, at the turn of an important phase of my life, I have realized that C is for Cinema and D is for Dreams. I hope we as a generation pass the knowledge what we have gained from this life and not what you learnt from your forefathers. I hope we never cease to believe that possibilities are endless and there can never be an end to what one can think. I hope that we never cease to explore the unknown and interpret things more and more.

Thank You and I hope You Dream a Lot!!!

I, Dream

2008-03-17T18:37:00.000+05:30

Rays of Sun with a gentle breeze,
Birds chirping in a distant corner,
And a coffee in hand & smile on your face and next,
Is it yet another day or am I waking up to one?

Traveling through hordes of anxious eyes,
Trying to come across the same as yours,
What wishes may come true?
What dreams may come true?

I am not on top where I have to be,
Maybe that’s a good thing to know that you have a long way to go,
And a step forward is just the starting,
You might just end up at a different destination.

What’s good for me & what’s bad…
Do I know or should I know?
I look around to understand this,
And find the same rebound.

Anxiety should I call it or fear of unknown,
At a time when every moment is meant to be exciting,
I sniff something around,
I think I am trying to read alien thoughts.

I am not crawling, am trying to walk,
I want to fall down,
I want to melt infront of an adversary,
And when I see myself standing the next day,
I know I have won, I am still standing.

Walk until you droop, you will know the road,
Run until you stop, you will endure the fight & the race,
Live and let the destiny take you along,
After all things shouldn’t be kept under control.

Dream….dream….dream
What dreams can you dream?
What dreams do you wish would come true?
What dreams end as dreams?
I, Dream….Do you?

-Hemanth

(23-10-07)

This poem was written on the second day at Satyam...Auditorium, loads of people around and me...

The "Y" Side...

2007-09-11T19:30:00.000+05:30

A generous smile greeted me when I opened my eyes,
It was different around than what I had imagined in my mother's womb,
I tried to move around and saw him then,
My source, such was his graceful appearance...

I instantly realised that I knew him,
He had heard me move in my mother's womb,
Placing his hand to feel how big I had grown,
That was my first contact with things alien separated by a thin membrane..

One day, he took me around,
me sitting on his shoulders,
to a place too far that I can't remember,
To see a Sun setting, a life down the hill gearing up for the night.

I wondered, why he was so calm most of the time,
Everyone else around seem to talk as if there's no tomorrow,
He replied for everything with an unreasonable smile and calmness,
I believed everything what others had told about him...he was so unusual!

One fine day, I happened to see his other side,
He was talking too much....and something seemed to be awry,
I think he just wanted to be himself,
A shade of his persona which was unknown to many.

Years later I looked at myself in the mirror,
And couldn't stop wondering,
How in the world could two people be so similar!
I had inherited his calmness...that eternal calmness!
and everything which people couldn't understand about him...

He's more than twice my age now
and staring down at the other half of life,
he drops a little hints here and there,
just to make me realize that my days have come to stand up for the rest!

Another day,Another night
I come across the bills and recall those visits,
For a moment I forget about the blood and hysteria around
Thinking about the feeling of togetherness...if only for a brief time
A privacy felt amongst a crowd...in a foreign land...

I think the day isn't too far,
which he had been preparing me for,
A day when he no longer would be on my side holding my hand
and let me fly free with time...

If only he could be with me,
To let me put my head on his shoulder,
and see the sun going down the sea,
With a calmness that exists between us...

P.S...To a person who gave me my name
From a person trying to live upto that name....

Alapana...

2007-09-09T14:04:00.000+05:30

A chorus in my backyard forced me to take notice,
Something so soothing...so reminiscent of days of my youth,
I walk now with a stick in my hand,
which never forgets to remind me of the days to come...

The evening sun infront of the house was going down the sea,
A glowing red spreads across the waters
Never had it ceased to amuse me as a child,
That Sea could engulf something so powerful...

The little waves touching my feet,
taking the sand away from underneath,
Something like time does to you...
Takes away moments but promising to return with better ones...

Once, I prayed so hard to let me fall back in time,
To a life that I had once lived,
Where all I would care was to forget about time,
That was the time when the next day was more promising...

I was amidst people who were brimming with life,
Bustling but serene at the same time,
When severing was not in mind,
yet knowing that one day we have to face it.

And then we did face it,
promising each other to never forget,
Etching the memories to our souls,
we moved on to the other side of life...

That's when probably I began thinking about time,
and from then on it started going faster than I thought of,
Years later, I looked back,
Found nothing apart from the lingering images of my youth...

I ask the rain, do you fall there too?
Where someone I know lives...
I ask the wind, do you blow there too?
Where someone I know lives...

Perhaps the sun is the best of all the messengers,
Rising in one part of the world while setting in the opposite,
It soothed me that we all share the same warmth,
Just reflecting what someone else is thinking in some part of the world...

I smiled that the waves washing my feet,
once kissed the feet of others I knew,
It made me jealous for an instant,
that when I couldn't,they met the ones I love.

The dusk reminded me of the night to come,
Reminding me that the time has come,
To walk back into oblivion of my life,
And seek a rhythm to this dwindling life....

I smile at the days bygone and hope the time keeps its promise,
But life's just that...made up of broken promises and hopes of undoing that,
Pure melody I would say, this way of life,
Chaotic yet reminding you that serenity exists in some part of the world,
A peace which everybody seeks, but only some find....

Dedicated to.....12 men with whom Time had been glorious(I wish there was no such thing as time!), a friend whose passion for books/theatre is immense, a friend who has never ceased to surprise me(my best partner when it comes to movies!)..."A n S", a journey through the lanes of Pilani which introduced another friend into list of specials, a lovely friendship forged in 3-2(i regret for not knowing all of them before...but better late than never!)....a lovely school where I first learnt to "converse".....Orkut/Facebook/Yahoo msgr for keeping those conversations alive after 8 long years!....and everyone else with whom I have spend my days and those whom I always to know but couldn't....[:)]

Note....In Indian classical music, an alapana is defined as the exposition of a raga(Melody). The flavor of the raga is outlined in the alapana by rendering the raga's permitted notes in structures and phrases unique to the raga. Alapana typically precedes a song that is going to be sung in the given raga.

Samsara...

2007-09-07T23:11:00.000+05:30

A fine morning greeted by singing birds and warm sun,
There was buzz around nothing like I had ever seen,
Quite an anxious day it was turning out to be,
I was being goaded to prepare myself to meet my prospective in-laws along with their son,

It was as if my whole life depended on that nod!
How old was I? Twenty??
I was cajoled to leave everything in the hands of God...
It wasn't the God that I thought of, but my life ahead which was filled with hopes plenty.

Little after 9 I guess, they had come,
I couldn't wait and saw the guy from a crack on the door,
Impressive I thought, he looked too calm!
My plans had changed now and I toyed with the idea of life with him more and more...

I walked into the room and pretended not to see him,
He didn't look at me either, but had the nerve to request for a private moment with me,
I wondered what he's gonna say
That was the first time I cursed myself for being unprepared for this moment

He looked around the room,
And admired the zari on my saree,
Maybe he didn't know where to start,
And I comforted him by blurting out something stupid!

After sometime we seemed to have hit a roadblock,
This was more or less a negotation
of what he likes and what I like,
little did we know how we are gonna end it!

And the unexpected happened atlast...
He asked, "What do you expect from me?"
I seriously had no clue...I had never thought about it myself,
He repeated once more, but I couldn't say anything..

Now it was my turn and I struck my blow!
I asked,"Are you ready for this?"
This caught him off-guard and he kept calm,
Both of us kept calm and looked into each other's eyes.

A little later, everything was fixed,
nobody gave us a chance to speak,
we were told that we were too shy to say anything
So...there it was...things worked out without even my nod.

Years later....one fine night,
I woke up to the sound of a thunder in the middle of a rain,
Wondering if my life was a dream or just a joke,
I looked around and found nothing but silence.
Silence and more of it, I had all day,
But I couldn't get an answer for that "why?"
Why did this happen?
Why didn't anyone stop it?

When I met him first, he asked me,
How do you see your life 10 years down the lane?
I didn't have an answer, but he did
I wonder why he never told me what he had in mind.

Over the years, the roads diverged
and one fine afternoon that happened.
Ever since I tried hard to connect the dots of our lives
Trying to understand if he was one unhappy or was it me?

The smile on my face is gone
replacing that is a eternal gloom
of having done something terrible
An unfathomable fear of being the reason for his death.

Yes, he died...but he had killed me years before,
Years before, when he became indifferent to my presence,
It was as if I am no more than a ghost,
Ghost who destroyed his Samsara...

His Samsara...where I didn't have a place!

The Cursed...

2007-09-06T23:54:00.000+05:30

The drops of rain kissing my body woke me up,
And people I saw around me giving a look profound,
How many times do I tell them that such things I scorn,
Yet the anger of my thoughts dies without making a sound.

Many a times I think with this burden on my back,
How cruel could Zeus be to give such a spherical shape to this stack,
How could he do this to me?...I merely played my part in the war...
he cursed me to bear this burden for eternity!

You know what the worst part is?...
I can't look at the Heaven, though it's me who bears the burden
Neither can I see the Earth , though it's just below where the heaven is,
Day and night, I look down and see nothing but a path untrodden.

I wasn't meant to be like this,
I hope my Lord would heed to my prayers,
but he never forgets to mention the betrayal,
and that erodes my hopes of redemption layer by layer.

All you creatures glaring at me from down there,
I have just one thing to tell you,
Don't forget that you too have a burden on your shoulders,
The burden of hopes and that of consequences,
You can't escape it, yet you think I am the only one around to carry it!

My lord! You have kept me down for time immemorial,
Yet I never understood what delight that begets
Maybe soon, one day you will realise my worth
And that day, I will look into your eyes
And say to myself, so this is how you look after all these years?

I once had a dream, to stand tall!
That's still a dream, but maybe the day isn't too far
I will swim across this pool and put the sphere under my feet
And scream....I am Atlas, the immortal Titan!

I am Atlas...I am Atlas...

What lies Beyond??

2007-09-05T13:02:00.000+05:30

One...two..three...I am coming,
"Sebastian, Ariel I shall find you".
I swim rather quickly flapping my small fins,
But I seem to be falling behind the other two.

Atlast I see them laughing in one corner
Laughing at my innocent and curious looks to find them,
I give up and swim across to join them rather meekly,
It's all so beautiful with them....we dance, we swim.

One day, I looked at the mighty gates of Atlantis,
Sebastian told me that beyond it lies a world turbulent,
So turbulent that you rarely have a chance to look back
I couldn't take my eyes of those gates, beyond it everthing looked fabulous

I began to think about those gates day and night
and began wondering how would life be without Sebastian and Airel?
Finally, I dared one day and crossed those gates
And I told myself,"Flounder, Here you go........!"

I swam..I swam as if there was no end,
All along, there were schools of others like me,
And there were corals, plants alien to me
Everything looked so beautiful and merry

And then I reached the edge of that land,
Beyond that, it was getting darker
I remembered Sebastian's words about a turbulent world,
I wondered if this was that? Yet, I couldn't stop myself...I carried on.

Somewhere down there, I got sucked into the current,
I couldn't look back...there was no looking back
I loved my ride, but little did I know where I would end up,
Something about life beyond the gates intrigued me.

The water was calm again, and I had no clue where to go,
Suddenly a Shark saw me and invited to have dinner with him,
I didn't like him and so I carried on my journey,
But perhaps that was my mistake, I should have stayed back with him

I turned and found myself heading straight towards the whale
It sucked everything down and I was afraid of getting lost
I tried to flap back and don't fall trap to this,
somewhere I prayed that I should have died in the hands of that shark rather than the whale!

The situation got too frantic
and as a last resort I prayed
O King Triton...O God Posiedon...Help Me...Help Me!
I don't know who it was, but with that flash of lightening I fainted

I woke up amidst Ariel and Sebastian,
They were laughing again that I had a daydream!
I smiled at my moronic dream,
Yet..I couldn't stop thinking about the life beyond...

What lies beyond? What lies beyond?

Hope....

2007-08-23T00:14:00.000+05:30

I fell down from heaven,
and was about to go where others go;
but maybe it was the wind,
I drifted away and no longer knew where I would go.

Up in the heaven sat my lord who said
"What are you doing? Don't you see you have strayed from your path?"
I couldn't wait to hear him,
I got sucked down to the earth

As we moved forward, I saw others falling into the sea,
they said, that's where we have to go;
I looked at myself determined to go the other way
This was my maiden journey and I couldn't go back

My lord up there banished me,
said, I betrayed everybody,
and that, heaven's door is closed forever for me!
I wondered if he had noticed what wind had done?

As I was falling down,
I saw a man sqautting beside a field mown,
Alas! I saw the agony in his eyes,
I saw the hope that one day someone like me would arrive;

My journey had a purpose
and I was soon going to be His messenger!
How you ask me? Haven't you heard of what are called as prayers?
My lord happens to listen to some of them;

Soon I found out that he was a farmer,
and I wanted to greet him with such a force
that he would notice me and open the doors
to his hope that Lord would listen to his murmur!

In an instant, I think I touched him,
I think he looked up
I think he saw where others had fallen,
As I lay dead infront of his eyes,
he smiled and wanted others to come

I came to an end...a tragic end
because never had I thought that someone would smile at my death!
but perhaps this was a message that to my Lord I send,
No matter how we stray, there's always a purpose
and no purpose is unworthy because it always results in something!

You ask me, what did my purpose result in?
Maybe more prayers....but I think it was Hope....and keeping it alive..
Beause that hope always results in something..

Hemanth
21/8/07

Highway to Truth

2007-08-23T00:13:00.000+05:30

once upon a time...maybe long ago,
it's believed that someone popped up in the garden of Eden,
after a moment of bliss, in came satan;
and tempted to commit the sin upon which He had decreed an embargo.

In a state of anger, He lost his senses,
and shunned his children to mortality
And years after they descended, they started building fences
And generations later they forgot the meaning of morality!

He saw that we were forgetting Him,
so he sent his messengers to remind about His presence,
for a moment there was no bounds to one's effervescenece
but I think it all started there and for some strange reason we divided Him,

In a strange turn of events, the apple turned the world around,
the infamous fruit had invoked a genius
things were never same again and a notion lost its ground,
A notion that He is the unquestionable genius!

Soon, they started defining things,
until one day, someone shattered the whole world
he proved that, God is just a made up story
and the reality is much more complex

Years later, another defined energy,
yet he looked at stars and exclaimed,"How can you look at stars and say God doesn't exist?"
You call him genius, but he's the most Humane Human
he initiated the eternal question!

Does God exist?
Is science the new Tower of Babel?
Everytime you define something ethereal,
you climb one level of the tower
maybe one day we will reach the tip too....

I just hope He doesn't show up in some corner,
that will just shatter everything that we have believed in so far,
Words, art, music have changed with time,
what if notions don't change?

I am no more naive,
I maybe wrong, but i am on the highway to truth
truth that will one day define what science has been trying for so long,
But, What if i reach that truth?...
If something is proved then science will have an upperhand,
does that mean, defining God will mean that He isn't what we think,
Will that proof make me an athiest?

Hemanth
19/8/07

Night

2007-08-23T00:12:00.000+05:30

It all happened one cold night, when I took a turn wrong...
and ended on a path unknown,
with snow dancing down from heaven
I greeted the wind on my cheeks with contempt;

Not that I hated the wind,
but the day was very unkind....perhaps it was my life that was!
Days, I spent wandering for something,
perhaps it's been years or maybe more.

I was told by many that I was looking for truth about too many things,
Things perhaps that I shouldn't ask myself,
why am I walking down this road?
Where would I reach?
It makes me all the more miserable....this having to choose!

I think I heard music somewhere on that road,
and I walked over to the fence to see what it was,
the strings of some instrument created magic,
and I heard something that I hadn't before;

I looked around and saw people sleeping,
and I looked at the grass they stamped below,
The air suddenly turned warm,
I couldn't understand why?

Maybe there were too many people,
maybe it was the magic of the music,
Someone told me that it's just movement of air molecules,
if that's so, then what's cold wind?
Am I falling deaf to things around?

I looked around and saw the joy and applause,
I saw the courteous thanking of the musicians,
I saw the harmony of life there,
I shifted my glance towards a baby, a little angel there,
I saw her curious glances and innocent smile

And I smiled....or maybe a smile escaped from my heart,
because I saw myself in her eyes,
I was no different than her; then what is this that torments me?
Am I carrying a burden to be someone among the crowd?
I think I am...and I don't know why?

Perhaps that's my quest now,
I looked towards the sky and saw the night glowing with stars,
They were smiling back and I was happy I looked at them,
It's been so long since I looked up...since I was happy.
And it all happened one night, when I took a turn wrong...

Hemanth
15/8/07

Are You in Heaven?

2007-08-23T00:09:00.000+05:30

Phew!...been so long since i posted something here...and been too long since i tried to write something good...Finally came up something last week....here's the poem of sorts...hope you will like it...and do pls comment on it, if you happen to read this one and few others above...[:)]

Are you in Heaven?

At the stroke of midnight, I was born,
not knowing what was happening;
There was commotion, there was mayhem,
little did I know why people were crying!

It made me sad that people always cried on that day,
it's my birthday for heaven's sake!
Yet, I can't stop people to keep their emotions at bay,
tell me what can I do for this anomaly to break?

Everytime I fly, I see people looking at me,
I see their joy, I see their pain,
But I also sometimes see victory in their pain,

One day, finally I saw someone smiling on my birthday,
I asked him why he was doing that?
He smiled more and walked away
But he told me one line which made me ponder,
"I am free....I am free"

I wanted to know what had happened on the day I was born;
one said he came outside the limbo,
another, he became rich;
one said, he was just happy;
but I think I found my answer when I bumped into someone!

"I learnt to look up and see the skies beyond,
I can see beyond the boundaries,
I can feel my urge ti stand up,
so everytime you fly, I look up and see the skies beyond!"

I thought, then why is that not everyone is the same?
Are they bound by the shackles of their mind?
That after all these years, they feel there's still something missing?

Sure, we have moved away from lot of kingdoms
from time immemorial and finally reached freedom.
For us, freedom was the kingdom where there were no boundaries,
first we fought for it, but still not everyone could have it;

So, here's what I say to all those who cry on my birthday;
Freedom isn't just a day of the year on which you can unfurl me;
I am your mirage, I am your apparition;
I am in your happiness, I am in your failure;
Perhaps.....that's what I am...

I am your peace....and peace within yourself is what I call Heaven is!
So, now tell me, are you just free?
or are you in heaven?

Hemanth
15/8/07

I just saw it couple of feet away!!....

2007-06-14T17:13:00.000+05:30

Remember, some years ago, there were only few spots which were "the thing" to do something...for example, in Hyderabad, Koti and Abids was for shopping and the situation was something like people from all over the city would come over to these areas to shop around....whereas in the case of Bangalore, it would be perhaps Brigade Road....But all this is a thing of past. Now, there are just too many options I suppose, which in a way I must say has done a lot of good for the citizens who now will have to travel less....I just hope, the old doesn't ever lose the charm for which it was once famous for...and I hope People always remember such places for what they stood for once upon a time....

Brand Visibility is perhaps the biggest matter of concern for today's market when there's just too many things to choose from. So, that's more or less would be the reason why you see billboards of the same company every 2 miles...leave advertising; this thing is happening for offering services as well...and undoubtedly the telephone service providers are numero uno in this issue...and coming close in that matter would be banks and ATMs perhaps... But over the past couple of years, I have seen something else coming up too...

ICICI bank once had a goal; to establish its branch every 2 kms across India, so that it can provide better services to the people...and SBI did another nice thing....an amazing network of ATMs...more or less one every 200 metres in some places...am sure it has made money transaction easier for most of us.... but giving it close competition is another unlikely brand....I would say it's "Cafe's Coffee Day" outlets...they are just everywhere....trust me in a city like Bangalore, it easily outnumbers any other brand in its segment and otherwise...it's more or less like a deja vu, each time you spot one, it feels as if you saw something just couple of feet away...maybe that's true in some cases!

What I wonder is, how we see this mushrooming of brands as? If it's a case of people loving coffee and the ambiance, may be...if it is a case of giving people a place to chill out..maybe...but my point is, do we need so many of the same brand that too....sometimes just few steps away! I still hope that they do good business in each of their outlets otherwise there's no point...as of now, it looks like that the panipuri outlets of our yesteryears have taken a new form...(hehe..No offence intended!)....wouldn't it be nice if SBI and Cafe' Coffee Day come to an agreement and instead of having one outlet separately, maybe there could be an ATM in every coffee day...this would save lots of space!!!

Protecting the Unknown....

2007-06-11T00:06:00.000+05:30

Look around and you will find lots of organisations trying to protect something....well, protecting the elements like Water, Earth and other things makes a lot of sense since they impact the society in one way or the other. But then there are organisations which seem to protect things like Culture, Language, Regions from outsiders...and so on. I wonder what exactly they want to do here. Of course expressing concern and protests are one way of doing it...but we nowadays take the road of violence and stringent action to make our point.

If 20th century was responsible for liberalisation from colonialism and the consecutive drawing of boundaries across the world; the present era demands for a society without any boundaries. I agree that it's our duty to preserve our culture and language but you just cannot ignore the influences that we have in our day to day lives. Take the case of language itself....we go as far as banning schools from teaching with English as the primary medium with the pretext that it might obliterate the respective regional mother tongue. But on the other hand we want everyone to rise up to the current demand of speaking a global language?!!! Is this possible....how can you have both??!! Isn't there a serious mismatch of what we are doing and what we are supposed to do??!!....Another example of such protection is about the wealth and land from foreign settlers....Till 1947 we fought against Britishers and then 60 years later too...we are fighting...but this time it's among ourselves!

Why do we fight among ourselves?? Economic differences are one major cause of this fighting; but what I find it more amusing is that why people blame others for their misery??!! It's not like they were eating in the same plate!!!....In most of the cases the notion that the land belongs to the original inhabitants of the land and so its resources there after should also belong to the native people. What we forget here is the effort that these supposed outsiders among our own people put in to develop those resources...We see this in places like Andhra Pradesh where the demand for a separate Telengana is gaining support day by day. I wonder had Hyderabad been in some other region, would this movement have been this strong??!!....Even in Karnataka we have these organisations which fight for the protection of Kannada and also the notion that all the riches of Bengaluru are being swooped away by the outsiders in the city is just too strong!!....

With the globalisation phenomenon taking centre stage in the present age, there's obviously going to be movement of jobs, money to different regions in the world. And in India it happened to be Bangalore, Hyderabad, Chennai while Mumbai and Delhi were among the list long before big businesses started in the southern cities. It's the innate nature of humans to feed upon resources where they are available in plenty....this is exactly the reason why there's movement of people within the nation...so, instead of resisting such movement, and much worse seeking some kind of security for the locals under these circumstances through reservations and quotas; we have to adapt for what the situation demands...as Thomas Friedman in his book "The World is Flat" says, if someone wants to keep his job, gone are the days when one can promise lifelong employment....it's the time when you have to show others that you are employable.

Boundaries are diminishing, we are going to live in a place called Earth where each nation is connected to one another by zillions of optical fibres...What we need to understand is that, however foreign we might dress, sound, talk, dress...but within we are still what we are. And what exactly is that....maybe each one of us understand what we are made of....!

How Flat is our world?

2007-06-10T16:45:00.000+05:30

If you have read the book "The World is Flat" by Thomas Friedman, you would realise what exactly is my question. This is not a review of the book but something which struck me while I was reading the book. On several occasions in the book, Thomas talks about the challenges in future for America and developed countries from countries like India and China. On the other hand, I wonder how many of us realise that we are capable of doing that one day in near future. Although things have changed to quite an extent, I would say, it should be attributed a lot to the focus of media on the booming economy which has turned our focus onto seeing this possibility.

Schooling is one important thing which has to lay the foundation for young generation to dream big. In an age when we are in the crossroads of deciding who should get what share of the pie; I am afraid we are again on the verge of losing a huge global opportunity. The percentage of people who are working towards this goal of attaining a whole new role and position at the world's stage is so minimum compared to the possible potential of the country! The yesteryear's generation of our country still keeps talking about our great freedom struggle and how this has brought a whole new identity for us....yes, that's true and that's really something to be proud of. But it is the generation of the 60's and 70's which really bothers me, because they are today's decision makers in every home and office and so many other places. Having born and brought up under a not so highly dynamic system of growth and opportunities; it is true that most of our parents had to undergo a lot of struggle to come out of their struggling phase of life. But what about us??....what about the generation of the 80's and 90's which has grown in the post liberalization era?? We haven't gone through the early years of struggle like our parents had and we don't understand what they had undergone....of course I cannot generalise this for everyone.

The problem is there is just too many choices and opportunities in the present age and the world which is changing itself so constantly that, it's difficult to point out which one we should adapt ourselves to. We are advised to take up something because it's a notion that it is good for a comfortable living. But is it really so in the present age? Friedman talks about how motivated were people during Space War in the 60's that it inspired a whole generation to take up Science and Engineering. And how that generation knew what it had to do 10 years from now.
Today, we don't have a space race, neither there's a nuclear race for our nation...we have already achieved both! The thing which we need to ponder upon is, what's next on the line? How long will we implement the present strategy of providing services for others? Do we really see ourselves as someone who can bring the next big change in people's lives? If so, in what way?....

We are going to reach the American standards in everything one day but what happens then? I am sure, when the disaster strikes this will be an immediate reaction too... Going by the present phenomenon and excerpts from the book also say that in this flat world America is stagnant and even receding at times and India and China are fast catching up! I wonder what's it going to be which will reverse the past 60 years phenomenon of G7's dominance?? Russia and G20 might be ready for the challenge, but the question is who will pose that challenge and who will set the parameters for others?? And who is going to be who will realise the existence of such a challange??...It all boils down to, how flat do we think our world is? And what are we going to do about it??....

Equality in the present age....

2007-06-10T16:27:00.000+05:30

One reason I believe why equality in the present age has such an important place is that, we are entering into an age of debate how we are looked upon by others. We demand for equality in everything; some wishes are granted and some aren't. And when things don't happen our way, we crib that there's no one who will listen to you. I think there should be equality in things like justice for all and maybe in access to education and employment (Here again...i am just saying "Access" as in I am strictly against reservation or partiality of any kind towards people of any caste/creed/race/region/colour)....

While in other cases the relevance of equality is fast diminishing. Take the case of the present age man himself. I believe that no two men should be equal...they shouldn't treat themselves as equals nor should others look at them as equals. For when you are equal, there's no difference between the two and their existence has no meaning...they are just clones! Differences should exist in our lives, otherwise there's nothing left to trade between two individuals or among a group. What I mean is, there has to be a difference in the knowledge levels, so that the person with more can "share" it with person with less in that field. Again one important that we mustn't forget here is that, if someone isn't good in something doesn't mean that he's not good at everything else...as I said differences should and do exist among us. That's what keeps us alive. Had there been no differences, cultures would have been wiped out, languages would follow in the same category, and jobs too....we do things that we are more capable of doing than others in exchange for something else, like Money.

On a larger scale, what we need to realise is that we can never be like somebody else. We should never be like somebody else....but yes, we should set for ourselves some parameters which look unachievable and progress in that direction....like the saying goes,"Aim for the moon, you will atleast reach the stars!". Forget about equality in the era of globalisation; unless we do something better than others, we are doomed. So, instead of protecting somebody under the umbrella of reservations or waivers we have to find ways to find gold in sand!

My new blog....

2007-06-10T00:21:00.000+05:30

Well..well...I thought, maybe I should dedicate one entire new blog just for movies.....so, here's the new one from me....http://moviesarenice.blogspot.com
This blog would be entirely for movies, reviews, trivia/quizzes, other aspects in movies....I hope you would enjoy reading that blog as much as I would love to write one....please do drop in your comments and suggestions...they really mean a lot to me...

Most Viewed on Youtube....

2007-06-06T14:47:00.001+05:30

The Video here is from Youtube....titled "Evolution of Dance" created and performed by Judson Laipply, an American Motivational Speaker and comedian from Cleveland, Ohio.

What's so special about the video??...Apart from being a very funny one...it's also the Most viewed video till date on Youtube.....49million+ views till date and the 6th most discussed video of all time. That definitely is something to watch out for!!...

It's a 6 minute video with steps for over 30 songs (out of which one song is repeated twice...)...surely will bring a smile on your face...[:)]

Disruptive Technologies @ H.O.M.E

2007-06-03T23:21:00.000+05:30

Disruptive Technologies....probably the better way of describing it as something which changes the way we live either in a good or a bad way. (In this case....technology is presumed to also mean an event/issue or maybe even a consequence.....)

During the evolution of mankind....first it was his power to think! This is what differentiated him from animals...and then there was his discovery of use of Fire...and invention of wheel....and other techniques in warfare starting with a bow and arrow, spear.....Later, there was construction...something unanticipated...for example, the Pyramids of Egypt and other monuments elsewhere across the world. For quite sometime, things went on like this...and then Man had already conquered the seas on his ships and new techniques in warfare...there were swords now!....One fine day, he made Gun Powder. That just changed the very art of warfare...the more the gun powder, the more the destruction! Then there was the Printing Press...this perhaps triggered the Industrial Revolution...then came Steam Engine and the rail roads and airways. Out of nowhere...following the two world wars....Colonialism was gone... and it led to a new world order which just changed the course of our lives in the past 60 years. Then there were Computers and Internet....and now, it's altogether a different story...which doesn't seem to have an end or a beginning....which we all are well aware of.....but what I am going to write about is not what's happening in the world around, but about how these changes around are influencing the disruptive technologies in our own homes and lives.....(It's just an objective point of view....I really can't generalise this issue for everyone...[:)]....)

1. After you are born, the first bottle of milk in your mouth triggers a whole new phenomenon which didn't exist before. It's just an indication of how life's gonna be in future...

2. First day at school amidst a whole new bunch of strangers...still can't forget the first day I had spent in each and every school I studied in....

3. After you realise what studies mean for you....the first report card!....that's one hell of a thing to watch out for...it's a brand on your head what you are "believed" to be made of....some schools go as far as making toppers wear "badges" which say that he/she is class 1st!!....that's so weird when i think about it 10 years later!!!....hehe....

4. This triggers another concept of "Success and Failure". Why does one need to fail to make someone else succeed??!!...I simply fail to understand this point....why does only one 1st rank need to be given??!!...What is the need to start a race to see who wins it?...I wonder, how would
things have been had they allowed the river to flow peacefully??!!

5. CHOICE....this probably is something which is quite ironic to its meaning. Probably the only act of human where he/she has very little right to do it for themselves....because there are plenty others to do it for you. And then you are told to follow it...because that's the best thing for you. It does coincide with your opinion sometimes...but still it's a decision where you would have wished you had more say in it....starting right after 10th!!!....Sometimes I wonder, in what corner of earth has "HEC" (History, Economics, Commerce) group in my own state of AP been thrown into??!!....No one talks about it....I guess some, don't even know it exists!....And then after 12th....it's the path for the next 3-4 years which has to be chosen!....Again here, there's more freedom on the one who has to face the reality's side....they get lucky too...for their wishes are granted and for others...it's again decided by others....you should be actually happy. People are reducing your burden of thinking!!!...

6. Society.....This probably has the most devastating effects than any other issue which might influence our lives. It's like an ocean where a tiny drop of water has no value or meaning unless the drops decides to go along with million others....the drop which refuses to go along with others...is either evaporated or left alone in a far far land during the journey with the other drops kicking it out of their path. It's both a boon and a curse...for when wind blows in your direction it becomes a boon and when it's against, it's a curse! It's the most astonishing thing which rides millions along the same path...be it in the craze for jobs....software (My god!!!...this one is just too much.....)....globalisation and what not to name a few....Call it the greatest lesson of Management....it's the best possible example of Chain Marketing or probably it applies to every other type of marketing where your decisions are based on recommendations and also sometimes...replicating what others do!....

7. Ideas....Imagination, Thoughts, thinking out of the box, crazy things which seem to be a misfit...might be termed as some of the synonyms of this disruption. It's quite a tricky thing too...for an Idea which goes well along with the "current" trend or the emerging trend in the society is well received...and if it isn't...then either it's a work of a genius or just a fool who's wasting time!....People who have great respect in Society and who can influence our decisions come under the category of Genius when something like this is told...and the others...well, they fall into the latter category. Well, I am not sure if Ideas can change the world....but the truth is, "Ideas can't be destroyed"....even if you keep your mind shut it thinks of million ways to come out of this condition....in the darkest of the alleys, it searches for the faintest possible light....such is the power of thinking....Maybe the only time we should stop thinking is when we are dead!!!....But look at the situation then....Society comes up with a whole new term for it...calling it as "Rebirth" and "life after death" and imagines what's the path going to be for us from then onwards....

They are all so, interconnected...with one triggering the other...and somewhere in the middle of all this...they get intermingled so badly that it's so difficult to determine which triggered what!...If you decide to come out of all this web at any stage...then good luck buddy...you are about to face "series of consequences" called L.I.F.E.....

Straight from Heaven...

2007-06-03T23:01:00.000+05:30

Imagine if something fell from Heaven what will that sound like when it strikes the earth??...hmm...sounds kinda improbable isn't it??...for the simple reason that we don't know where exactly this Heaven is....lets suppose it's up in the sky then??

There's rain from the sky....and I can't describe what it sounds like....probably we are still far from describing it in english with one single phrase!....But nevertheless it's one of the most soothing sounds of nature that you can hear...and right now I am in the process of that!...Countless drops of fresh water....soiled and coloured with all the pollution of the city falling outside my walls....I wonder what exactly I should do to let this feeling stay on for a little longer time??!!....

Rain...Rain... don't go away....
I want to sleep for some more time,
Rain...Rain...don't go away....
It's a beautiful scene to watch things around cleansed by your downpour,
Rain....Rain...don't go away....
For things look far more beautiful without people around,
Rain...Rain...don't go away....
I wish....you stay a little longer....it's nice to see life slow down for sometime,
for, I can smell the aroma of my coffee a little longer
I can smell the beautiful earth's aroma wafting in the air,
It's music to my ears when you dance down from up above,
I always wonder...what's the best possible way to describe you??!!...

And....and...there you go....leaving me alone again,
Maybe you should have stayed a little longer, I wanted to tell you a secret,
I miss you a lot, you don't even tell me when's the next time you shall meet me,
What??!!! You say, I am one among the others??!!And you ask, how different am I from others?

Hmm...that's an interesting question!...I wonder, what do I need to do to prove that I am not like others whom you see everyday?....I wonder, do I really need to do all this??!!...Maybe "others" like me are thinking about something too....but the question is....what's it that they everybody seems to be thinking of and I ain't??!!

Life is a Hologram...

2007-06-02T19:22:00.000+05:30

How many times have most of us wanted to be so many things??!!!....I remember as a child I wanted to be a scientist, and then in school after developing a great interest for History, I wanted to be a Archaeologist...and then when finally I went to High school, Science seemed pretty interesting, so I wanted to be a Doctor....but finally it was decided that I should become an Engineer!....

After having graduated recently from College with an Engineering degree, I come to think about it...phew!...what a journey has it been from a scientist to an Engineer...but wait, the list hasn't ended. Owing to the multiple exposure of different topics and options...I guess I have a list which will never end. The moment you start thinking about the life ahead....you want to be something. The question is what exactly out of the given choices that you have?

It is not uncommon that your choice is influenced by the extent of money you can earn later, yet I don't disagree with the fact that some of us don't bother much about the money factor. They say, you need to look at the global scenario when you think of life ahead. That's probably what most of us end up doing...because lot of times your decision depends on what the person next to you is doing....this could be anybody...your friend, neighbour, relative, anyone else!!....it's like a continuous chain which links to almost each and everyone of us and thus moving forward. The ones who don't want to be a part of this chain....I am worried about the ongoing phenomenon that.....they are looked upon as someone who's irresponsible towards one's life..literally an outcast!.....You want proof of such phenomenon??!!....Just look at the sheer number of Engineers and Doctors we have in our country...phew! unbelievable...I wonder if each one of us wanted to be an Engineer or a doctor....or maybe we just ended up being so!

Life....Life is something like a Hologram...it just changes itself depending on the light...which is similar to ideas and multiple things that you learn each day....and also which angle you look at it!...what i mean to say is, before aiming for the top, never forget to look at your sides..you will get a fair idea of how much your are competing for!!!....But the question is, Are we ready to look at life as a hologram??!!!....Are we ready for the changes that might spring up??!!....Wants can't be suppressed for long...if they are, either you feel that it wasn't the appropriate thing to do, or you are just waiting for the right moment to do it sometime soon....

I wish, if all of us look at this phenomenon from different angles and maybe we can see different things happening which hitherto were thought to be an impossible thing to happen!....Routes to success can be plenty...I think they are....What we need to do is, not imbibe a notion that some routes are bad which will lead to a disaster....because all that matters is the journey and the end goal on the route you take......But what if there is a dead end on some route?!!....Well...well...Life has such endless possibilities...who knows there might be some surprise waiting for you in some corner!!!.....

Whispering through walls...

2007-06-02T19:21:00.000+05:30

May 16th, 2007...probably it's one date which I am not gonna forget for quite a long time. The reason being, I unofficially graduated from college. Now, in college there are always two kinds of people, those who love it...and those who don't. And then there are others....who neither love or hate college...it's just another 4 years of their lives....no big deal. And I....I loved it...for everything that it has taught me...and for giving me all the time to think and do what i feel like doing....

Then when I finally landed in my home, things weren't all rosy to be honest. In another 2 weeks we had to shift to a new apartment, which means that I have to help in packing stuff....given the leisurely pace at which I would love to work, I am supposedly way behind the expectations!!!....hehehe...and what followed next is completely different story. And then finally we landed in a new apartment in one of the posh localities of Bangalore....

The very first thing which my dad told me after coming to a new house is...."We have lived the past two years in some sort of hiding; and now, with so many people around who all work for the same organisation...you are bound to be watched...so, be careful in what you do!"..Fair enough I suppose!....

In the first one week of my stay here...I used to look around and wonder...wow! there are so many buildings and apartments around....and plenty of people too. Quite a different scenario from our tiny house in another locality....anyway, another interesting thing about this new apartment is that....there's a huge park in front of it....and if i am not wrong, then you can see people jogging/walking right from 5 PM to night 11PM!!!....that's right....maybe even after 11 PM!!!....of course you get to see only children and families in the evenings and couples after dark...hehe....Looking at so many people doing this routine, I wonder if they are doing it for the health reasons or is it that they feel as if some kind of obligation to utilise an oppurtunity!...whatever maybe the case, it's nice to see so many people at one place!....

Another day, Mom told me that, someone was enquiring about us!...So, in a way, what dad had been telling me was infact true....everyday i stand near my window and stare at the 7 floor high block trying to figure out if i can spot someone in any of the floors....of course i am not always successful in doing so....But for some strange reason, I can feel plenty of people, watching us behind those closed windows and curtains. And I carry the burden of trying to justify that we are a pretty nice, social newcomers!....of course, I don't do anything....I just sit at home, watch movies and blog....pretty much the same what i used to do in college....just that, in this phase of life....I...I...

I wonder, if someone is watching me every 10 minutes,
I wonder, if someone is eager enough to get to know the newcomers,
I wonder, if I can hear yet another airplane go high above me in the next 5 minutes,
I wonder, if I will see the same people jogging in the park,
I wonder, if something interesting will happen on any given day,
I wonder, if someone will give me a call which might make my day
I wonder, If I will ever be prepared for the challenges ahead,
I wonder, I wonder, why does time fly by so soon? Why did I graduate so soon?
I wonder, if I have better things ahead,
I wonder, if it's gonna be as good as my past,
I wonder...why do I just keep wondering almost all the time!....

On the lot

2007-06-02T18:50:00.001+05:30

The brand new TV reality show being aired on Star World in India seems to have generated quite a lot of interest....hehehe...I am not too sure of that statement, but what I am sure of is that this is one of the new shows which I don't miss on TV these days....[:)].....to put it in simple terms....the show is about Film-Making.

After screening several applicants and after several rounds during the show, the number is down to final 18. Out of which last week 3 were eliminated. Since, I started watching the show very recently, I would like to write about the recent episode that I had seen in the show. A two hour premiere of the 1 minute short films made by the contestants....they were evaluated by 3 judges comprising, Carrie Fisher (Actress, screen-writer), Gary Marshall (Director, Runaway Bride) and D.J.Caruso (director, Disturbia).

A small investigation from Wikipedia shows that this show hasn't done well in US...but still it's captivating enough...the reason. The big prize which the winner is gonna take home....

A 1 Million dollar deal with Dreamwork Motion Pictures!!!!......isn't that good enough??

Anyway, in those 18 minutes.....here's my favourite short film...made by Zach Lipovsky, a Canadian, Special Effects expert....titled..."Danger Zone"....check out the video
something about the movie....A simple concept...which was completed in one single 360 degree shot....Zach says he had to do it 46 times to achieve this level of perfection!....

Check out the show...it's good enough especial if you love movies...then please do watch it....it's now down to final 15!...

7/7/7

2007-06-02T12:36:00.000+05:30

555 became famous as a cigarette brand....666 became famous as the number of Devil....but 777 beats it all....because 07/07/07 is just gonna change the face of history as we have known it for the past 4000 years. This is the date on which the New Seven Wonders will be announced in Lisbon, Portugal. And we have a chance to select the new seven wonders of the world from the remaining 20 candidates...(Pyramids of Gaza, Egypt has been removed from the voting process....since it's the only remaining monument of the old 7 seven wonders...it has been declared the honorary new 7 wonders candidate )

The last 21 candidates are....

1. Acropolis (Athens).......
2.Alhambra, Spain
3. Angor Wat (Cambodia)
4. Chichen Itza (mexico)
5. Christ the Redeemer (Rio, brazil)
6. Colosseum (Rome)
7. Easter Island Moais (Chile)
8. Eiffel Tower (Paris)
9. Great Wall (China)
10. Hagia Sophia (Turkey)
11. Kiyomizu Temple (Japan)
12. Kremlin, Red Square (Moscow)
13. Macchu Pichu (Peru)
14. Neuschweistein Castle (Germany)
15. Petra (Jordan)
16. Pyramids of Gaza (Egypt)
17. Statue of Liberty (USA)
18. Stonehenge (England)
19. Sydney Opera House (Australia)
20. Taj Mahal (India)
21. Timbaktu (Africa)

And here's the final seven which I voted for....
I must confess that as a student when I was back in high school, I had a great interest in History and various civilizations across the world. So, probably my final 7 list has been more or less influenced by my past....anyway, here's how the list goes....in No Particular Order.....

Acropolis.....I see this monument as the greatest symbol of Greek Civilization and also once the greatest empire of Greeks. True to its attributes of Civilization and Democracy, we owe it quite a lot for the democracy that we are seeing today.

Christ the Redeemer..... Standing on top of the Corcovado mountain overlooking Rio de Janeiro, Brazil this statue strikes me as the numero uno symbol of Brazil. Although a representation of Christ....it's something more than just a religious statue....it stands for the Love and Welcoming and openess of Brazil to the world...something which I think each one of us should replicate.

Colosseum....Another symbol of the mighty Roman Civilization...this once was a playground where people of Rome used to watch the Gladiators fight!.....A symbol of a by gone era....it deserves all the attention you can give.

Hagia Sophia....To be frank I hadn't seen this monument anywhere on the net, until I saw the movie Guru....but when I did, I was dumbstruck at its sheer beauty and enormous layout of the whole structure.....A symbol of the Byzantine empire...now, it stands as a monument both for Christians and Muslims....sometimes I wonder, how similar does it look like Taj Mahal....this one too has 4 minarets and a central structure of course both of them stand for different things....a beautiful amalgamation of Islamic and Christian architecture...this has stood the test of time of all the crusades of the medieval ages!

Machu Picchu....All we have now of this place is the ruins of what was once was the prime seat of the Incas. I had read about the Inca's civilization in High School...but the visual representation of this Mountain and the ruins....I had was again from a movie Motorcycle Diaries...simply amazing!....I always wonder why in India, most of the temples are on top of a mountain....but this one beats it all....there's actually a city on top of a mountain!!....I guess if ever I got a free world tour this would be my second choice....first being the entire archives of Pyramids...Egyptian civilization and the exhibits in British Museum!.....Please....please vote for it....

Petra......I saw a wall paper long time ago in college which showed an amazing formation of rocks leading to something.....and sometime later...I saw a video song which was shot in the same location....and thanks to Discovery channel...i saw it one day......Phew!...to have that kind of architecture amidst those mountains requires some skill!....and to create a whole city inside the mountain...well, i just don't have any words for it....this city once served as a pit stop for travellers who were moving across Asia and Europe.....a man made wonder in true sense!...

Taj Mahal....Yep, I voted for this one. Everyone keeps talking about it....people from far away lands...it's more or less seen as a symbol of India....there's so much myth and controversy about this monument...some allege that it was once a Shiva's temple named Tejo Mahal long before Shah Jahan remodelled it....some have serious doubts about the exact date when it was built....whatever the case maybe...I guess I voted for this one....because this is the only chance that we have in our lifetime to make a difference....only chance to make our misconception that Taj Mahal is one of the 7 wonders of the world into reality ( I still remember...how I used to argue that it's not one officially long time back!)....but to be honest....I guess I voted for this one...because I felt it was a self imposed obligation that I vote for this as an Indian....I hope the A.R.Rahman's song motivates more people to vote for it.....do vote for it....to prove what our misconception about it being a wonder of the world is infact true.....hurry up,....last time i heard...it's got less than 1% of the total votes!!!......

Remember....the voting ends on 7/7/7...that just a month away....[:)].....

Amen!

India and its Catch 22 issue

2007-06-01T21:52:00.000+05:30

"There are two roads...if you take one, you are doomed. And if you take the other you are doomed too!" This is more or less a definition of the Catch 22 phenomenon. Some of us would have read the Joseph Heller's novel by the same name and I am pretty sure it's a good one too...but what has India got to do with the Catch-22 phenomenon??

If you had seen the news on 31st May, 2007...the Ministry for External Affairs "demanded" its Sri Lankan counter-part that it shouldn't approach either China or Pakistan to fight against the LTTE. What makes this extremely interesting also being a Catch-22 situation....after the assassination of Rajiv Gandhi by LTTE, India vowed that it will never forgive LTTE. But 16 years later, LTTE did accept that it was a big mistake and gave a formal apology...but even now India hasn't forgiven what LTTE had done. On the flip side, one of the main ally of the present UPA government, DMK is known to be inclined towards LTTE...more precisely for the rights of Tamils residing in Sri Lanka. And we have seen several times in the recent past, DMK and its allies voicing opinions regarding this issue.

What makes the entire issue a Catch-22 for India is that, it doesn't supply arms to Sri Lankan Army which is fighting against LTTE and trying to subdue the civil war; neither does it agree to be the mediator between the Lankan Government and LTTE during the recent peace talks....(can't believe it was Sweden which agreed to do so!!!....and Thank God, someone came forward!!!)....and now...now that Sri Lanka wants an external support to fight against LTTE....India says that it is the Big Power in the region, so Sri Lanka shouldn't go to other countries for help. What's even more surprising is that, India has always been a sovereign state and it's actually hard to believe that it's acting like a big brother to its neighbouring nation. Lets say even if it agrees to supply the arms given a condition that Lanka asks for help from India....I wonder if DMK would agree to it!!!....you just can't allow your country to fight against your own people residing in other countries!!...can you??

Which brings us to our second issue.....owing to its foreign policy which doesn't allow India to indulge in other country's matters....it just cannot sit silent to allow China or Pakistan to come anywhere near its shores....such is the level of trust we have with our neighbours!..[:(]

It would be interesting to see the developments in the near future on this issue and I am actually wondering if we would be able to get ourselves out of this issue without hurting anybody. But in the end I guess someone has to lose. Whether it's the "ego" of the UPA govt to not forgive the LTTE and thus playing a major role in the peace process....or will it be conceding the Sri Lankan government to go ahead with its plan of asking for help from either China or Pakistan to come so close to the Indian shores which might have some future implications.....well, we will have to wait and see....!!!

The Inconvinient Truth...

2007-06-01T20:02:00.000+05:30

An Oscar award winning documentary on Global Warming featuring Al Gore, the former Vice-President of US during Bill Clinton's time is what this is about. Undoubtedly one of the best documentaries I have seen in the recent times. What makes this so interesting and compelling piece of work to watch is that it shatters so many myths and notions that you would have had about Global Warming and its long term affects.

Coming to the story of this documentary, it travels along the political and sociological conquest by Al Gore to address the problem of Global Warming and also explaining the major concepts and affects to a studio audience in front of a huge screen. As a student when his professor presented the first ever measurements of CO2 levels in the atmosphere and based on his predictions, Al Gore, states is what really compelled him to take upon this mission and this remained as one of his major issue during his entire political career spanning 3 decades. First as a senator and then as a member of the Clinton administration, Al Gore explains his battles fought in the court over the first ever case on Global Warming, then allegations on one of the chief member in Sr.Bush's regime and then also some on the Kyoto Protocol which he himself suggests is controversial in US....

What is equally interesting is the comparison he draws between the mother nature and his own son who was fatally injured in an accident while he was a senator. He terms it as a reaction when you see your beloved is fighting for their lives!....Also, he goes back and forth in his own life and talks about how his life in his childhood was...emphasizing that it is the responsibility of the current generation to make the future safe for our future generations. He uses his presentation on Global Warming to the best possible extent to explain several factors in the issue and the picture below is one among the slides.......
I want to talk about this slide and the elements shown; this infact has been my wall paper for sometime now...(a "safe" desktop wallpaper when at home, i suppose...hehehe!!)
What you see in the picture above is the direction of the principal ocean currents, where the red one indicates the warmer, lighter current and the blue one indicates the colder, heavier current. This basically explains that all the ocean currents are interconnected to each other....and the area right next to Europe where the warmer current becomes heavier and colder thus going back in direction...this inturn generates lot of heat which blows across Europe and keeps it warmer. But, as explained in the documentary, thousands of years ago, the whole of Canada was one huge landmass of ice which over a period of time melted and suddenly the water gushed into the Atlantic Ocean thus jeopardizing the whole conversion process. This created the five lakes on the US-Canada border and as a result of sudden injection of thousands of gallons of fresh water...the conversion of warmer current to colder one stopped, thus stopping the warmer air to blow over Europe....this had such massive implications that the whole of Europe went into an ice-age!!!

The modern day implication of this process is the process of another huge land mass of ice in the adjacent area of Greenland...and given the pace with which the ice is melting as a result of global warming, there is a possibility of triggering another ice-age in as less as 10 years time!!!...One possibility which the governments across the world shouldn't overlook while talking about this phenomenon....

Among other problems related to global warming is also that, it causes stronger storms and on the contrary, another major issue is the dislocation of precipitation; this is the reason why some areas across the world have been facing sever drought in the recent times...esp in North Africa, Darfur...while some other regions receiving excessive rainfall. There are other problems with migratory birds and the birth of caterpillars which are the food for the young birds....outbreak of new diseases and the resurface of problems which were minimized....and above all of this...the problem of migration under such circumstances....Are we ready for a huge wave of refugees??...That's one of the major issues right now, we can already see the implications of this thing about refugees in the ongoing Iraq war.

The documentary also stresses on stringent measures by the governments across the world to tackle the issue...for example...the Himalayan Glaciers are melting at a dangerous speed...and not in a distant future, 40% of the world population which gets water from these glaciers is in serious trouble. But, what's equally puzzling is the situation in which India is right now. The government says...this is all happening because somebody elsewhere in the world is contributing majorly to global warming and India and the adjacent countries are paying the price....true, very true!....Hope there is a solution for this problem soon....

I guess, there are enough reasons for everyone to watch this flick....even though it's a documentary, the style of narration is engrossing enough to keep you interested. It's a brilliant film from a scientific point of view, which I think should be shown in every school and college so that the students are aware of the danger of the present age because they as the future generation of the world would have to come terms with it....something which is even more threatening than Terrorism!.......

"Two Thumbs Up"....."Must watch Flick"....rent it/buy it/ copy it....ain't matter...if you miss this, you really are missing a masterpiece....[:)]

Deja Vu...

2007-05-30T23:47:00.000+05:30

I have a question for you....Have you ever been through a Deja Vu??...That's a term used to describe something that you are so sure that has occured in your life and it's occuring again although it might not be so...in several cases it's more or less a small incident but rarely would you have heard of incidents of Deja Vu after watching a movie sometime back.....Now you might say, it's stupid and quite a baseless statement to say. How can anyone experience the same things after having seen a movie of that kind??...

I am not talking about the usual comedy/romance/heavy drama/blah...blah of cinema....but i just can't stop thinking about two movies that i saw earlier this year.....Italian movie "Noshtalgia" by Tarkovsky and Swedish movie "Cries and Whispers" by Ingar Bergman...while the former is full of silence of self and yearning for the beloved, the later is about sibling rivalry .....both these qualities spectacularly portrayed things in both these movies....In Noshtalgia you see a writer who's thinking about his past and his homeland almost all the time though he's in a distant country....and in the latter movie...you have two sisters who have developed huge mental walls between themselves for what may seem like a very trivial reason....

Lemme put things into perspective by saying that...I am that man who thinks about his past...maybe just too much...or maybe it's just too many times...I guess it's a combination of both which makes it seem so close like a Deja Vu....I wonder why I keep thinking so much about so many things...most of them might seem to be very silly which even my Mom tells me that I day-dream way too much and thus neglecting my day to day responsibilities...but then maybe I don't see a better thing to do than to think and trying to find answers for what you think. So, in a way it's both a boon and a curse to think a lot. On one hand it generates lots of ideas out of which maybe one day, one among them might change the course of your life....the curse is that, maybe it will lead you to a path where you believe that there are much better things to do in life than that. Right now, I am more inclined to the boon part of it....which brings me to my second Deja Vu....building mental walls for seemingly trivial reasons....

A question constantly posed by my mom is that, "Why are you so Lazy??!!...Don't you see the other kids of your age of the present generation??!!...they are so capable of doing anything..." Now I wonder, why is my laziness a question of my capabilities...now I don't claim that I can do anything....but since when did not doing something become...not capable of doing anything?? I think about this which takes time....and inturn it adds to my laziness...hehehe....quite an irony it is!!...Another notion is that, if there's plenty of food with a TV(of course with cable) and a Computer (with internet)....it just doesn't matter where I live...be it among tons of people around or on a maroon island!!...and I had a taste of that life for 2 days...something which I am not gonna forget....you see, again there I thought...What kind of life can you live when the person sitting next to you is forcefully avoiding to talk to you!!! and not willing to give up under any circumstances even though you are almost begging to talk....atleast if I am on a lonely island, i will be happy to live a life the way I want to live it...but with someone who's willing to set up a similar condition at home!!....that's scary...that's really scary....Yes, this is me Hemanth who confesses that silence and lonliness is a scary thing when you know that you are not really alone and have to restrict the way you think and someone is actually watching you, why in the world are you like that!!....

Finally after having gone through 2 days of struggle within...there was a sunrise and atleast for the time being I was less lazy and atleast for the time being the mental wall collapsed!!....hoping that this phase of life of mine gives me wisdom to think what I wanna think without "starying" away from my generation....but WTF, why should I be like someone else, when in the end all that is gonna matter "How should I be myslef??"...Think about it. Maybe you will come across an answer....[:)]

Woh Haseena Zulfon waali!!!....

2007-05-30T23:15:00.000+05:30

Natália Guimarães ....Phew...phew...phew....I just had one glimpse of her on the final of Miss Universe-2007 and was completely blown away!!...and i wonder...how in hell could she come second!! thought she deserved to be the winner....I am talking about the first runner-up Miss Brazil....

Would have loved to watch the whole show, but then I have no clue I didn't switch on to "Star World" till the final round...I guess it's reserved for the Indian Soap on channels like Sun, E and Gemini TV...[:)]...anyway...the final round wasn't that exciting; and thank God...I didn't hear any cliched answers like...I wanna do something like Mother Theresa and all other things...it's nice that these beauty queens talk about great people but then at some point of time, it just looks too artificial...they look as if they would do it if and only if they win the crown...otherwise, they are plenty of other options open for them...(i guess there are plenty of them who follow what they say, but this is one opinion which I have had for quite sometime about them)

And since it was being held in Mexico, i expected to see some anti-US remarks and there I was!!...Miss USA, Rachel Smith was booed so badly..at one point of time felt so sorry for her...but it didn't take long to focus all my attention on this lovely lady from Brazil...even Miss Venezuela and Korea was pretty....but as fate reigned supreme...Miss Japan took the first place...I wonder why??!!....I mean look at this lady...if there had been a popular vote for on the spot decision....then I am so damn sure that Brazil would have won it by a comfortable margin..hehe.....

Anyway, I bow before God...and wonder at the magic of His creation....

My Last Article...For EPC

2007-05-07T15:21:00.000+05:30

I wonder, why I have been asked to write this one. And I will never be asked to write something like this again….4 long years…well they are going come to an end in less than a month!!!...Over the last few days my friends have been asking me, “Are you feeling psenti that you are leaving this place?” The answer is…No, not even a bit psenti about leaving this place. The reason why I say this is, there’s nothing that I can shed tears for, there are only smiles about everything imaginable, because every memorable moment is so crystal clear in my mind that I can just recall as if it has happened just few days ago!!! It’s for the sake of those zillion memories that I take back with me that I don’t cry. Maybe I am too overwhelmed to accept the fact that I will not be here anymore…

On Day1 we were told that attendance is not compulsory, there is no curfew after dinner like in several other colleges back home, you get to choose your own timetable; they said, you are mature enough to make your own decisions. Yeah…that is what this place is all about….we call it, “FREEDOM”. Some of us are of the opinion that too much of freedom will deviate us from the path of what we are supposed to do and what basically we are here for. Yes, they are quite right about that, but maybe I should mention this quote from the speech by Steve Jobs in Stanford University, “Life is too short. Don’t spend it living someone else’s. You gotta find what you love to do…so, don’t stop until that day, keep looking.” What we are about to do in the next 5 years might not be the same what we will end up doing in the next 20-30 years. And those seeds have to be sown right here, so later when you look back you will realize what great influence has these 4 years had on the rest of your life.

Everyday has been a pleasure to live here…so, the next time if some of you hear a comment someone saying “I can’t believe how those 4-5 years went”, you know why they say that!!! As someone who does very little apart from seeing things go past in a jiffy, watching movies or maybe even talking to someone, I wonder why didn’t that moment last longer. What I want to say, there’s nothing which is going to wait for you and as one of my senior had told me in my first year, “There’s no time for anything…you will have to make it from whatever you have.” One fine day, all that is going to matter is what we think and how far we can go to make those thoughts come true…make those dreams come true.

Before I forget, I really should mention some things which I would miss a lot!!!...Pappu’s Double Chai, Chimpu’s MNB, chai in Nutan under the moonlight just before sunrise, DC++ and all those people with awesome collection, people who smile at you for no reason, friends who are too excited to tell you “the” gossip in town, all those friends and seniors who have had a huge influence on me, heavy ghotting for each and every subject right from first year (Pun Intended!!!) and the biggest of all, Movies and Internet!!!

How I wish, these moments last longer, but maybe there’s more to come, that’s why everything has to have an end…atleast that’s what you can hope for. So, there go my last few words which I thought I could share, wish you all loads of success in life and for all those who still have time left here, think and do whatever you want to. This is BITS, this is LIFE.

A tribute to Boredom.....

2007-04-17T16:22:00.000+05:30

I was reading this post on one of my friend's blog named "The 'Stolen' Tag" ...more or less a tribute to boredom!!! and at the end of it...I was tagged, because I had read the post till the very end...hehehe...so, here's my list of things!!!

1. Were you named after anyone?
I was about to be named "Heli"...incidentally the Comet "Halley" was around in that year..but the pujari was kind enough to suggest to look for some other name starting with "H".

2. Do you wish on stars?
They just remind me of a quote by Einstein, "How can you look at stars and not believe that there is no God?"

3. When did you last cry?
Not sure...but then crying doesn't necessarily mean that it should end with tears....sometimes those unseen drops have too powerful feelings attached to themselves

4. Do you like your handwriting?
Only I seem to like it...although all my teachers in school used to say that it looks as if a cockroach dipped in ink has crawled over the paper.

5. What is your favourite meat?
Chicken!!!

6. What is your most embarrassing CD on your shelf?
Any empty DVD/CD...b'coz that's not the purpose of its existence...it has to have some or the other movie recorded!!!...heheh

7. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you?
Oh yeah!!!...i would have wondered how can such people even exist??!!...nothing short of one of a kind.

8.Are you a daredevil?
hehehe....not really...although i tend to be devilish and mean at times.

9. How do you release anger?
Thinking...thinking...blogging at times...but i haven't found a better option to release my anger than watching a good movie..it's easily my favourite stress buster...favourite companion when i am alone.

10. Where is your second home?
Pilani :D.

11. Do you trust others easily?
Yes.

12. What was your favourite toy as a child?
a monkey doll which my brother had...I used to throw it all over the place till mom scolded me.

13. What class in school/college do you think is totally useless?
Math till class 10!!! I used to flunk it lot of times...but then my perception changed...and I am glad it did.

14. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
Maybe not...but sometimes I guess I surprise myself!!

15. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?
No.

16. What do you look for in a guy/girl?
Ability to sustain a decent conversation.

17. Would you bungee jump?
No...I am afraid of heights. But the day I come over this phobia..I would just love to do all that...

18. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
No, laziness prevails.

19. What's your favourite ice cream?
Anything except strawberry flavour....but Chocolate rules!!

20. What are your favourite colours?
Black...black...black...

21. What are your least favourite things?
Being the odd man out in a crowd.

22. How many people do you have a crush on right now?
hehehe...taken a break this semester..Who said I stopped!!!... the number is obviously bound to increase...I am gonna graduate this summer...yuppie!!!

23. Who do you miss most right now?
Company of all those I have been with over the past 3 years.

24. What are you listening to right now?
Some movie themes...Shivaji and Prasanna...and operas by Mozart.

25. If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?
Black/red...would wanna die soon and try to be something else...i guess that's what we all do everytime...changing ourselves to prove our existence.

26. What is the weather like right now?
Horribly Hot!!!..I can't even sleep these days.

27. Last person you talked to on the phone?
Dad.

28. The "first" thing you notice about the opposite sex?
There is something called as "Likeable Index" in my brain...so, would see how likeable is she...of course in the first notice it's the physical apperance which counts!!!...(Muhahahaha...)

29. Do you like the person who sent you this?
Oh yes...tagged from one of my best friends.

30. How are you today?
As always- restless and Inquisitive....waiting to see if this day would be anything different from the previous one.

31. Favourite non alcoholic drink?
Chai...but these days...I prefer Coffee!!!

32. Favourite alcoholic drink?
Haven't tried much...I mean different Varieties..but then Vodka with a good amount of salt and lemon would be IT!!

33. Natural hair colour? Black

34. Eye colour? Brown

35. Wear contacts? No

36. Siblings? Yes

37. Favourite month? Feb.

38. Favourite food? Anything good...but then Chicken is always up in the charts.

39. Favourite day of the year?
None in particular...or maybe I have too many to figure out which one is more important.

40. Have you ever been too shy to ask someone out?
Oh Yes...everytime...too much of planning goes in..hehehe..but it's nice fun nevertheless

41. Scary movies or happy endings? Doesn't matter...as long as it is a good movie.

42. Summer or winter? Spring.

43. Holi or Diwali?
Both. Who cares, its holiday time.

44. Do you like your name?
Love it, although I wonder how it would have been had I been named "heli"...hehehe...

45. What book/magazine are you reading?
The City of Joy- Domique Lapierre...but dropped it for the time being...gonna read "The Animal Farm"-George Orwell... for the second time..i just lev it!!

46. What's on your mouse pad? Don't have one.

47. What did you watch on TV last night?
Not a TV addict when I am on campus...but late night TV is always reserved for movies on HBO/Star Movies at home

48. Favourite Smell?
Post Rain, Choclate....and the smell of chicken boiling with the umpteen number of spices...delicious!!

49. Have you ever regretted breaking up with someone?
Hehehe...haven't even started a relationship to break one!!...

50. Most tiresome thing you’ve ever experienced/done?
Just cannot figure out how to console my friends when they are not in a good mood.

How I wish this list goes on...now that it has ended...have to look for something else to do...I seem to have fallen in love with boredom...everytime I think I am bored...I end up doing something...most of the times it happens to be blogging....hahaha!!!

Seven Days...

2007-04-17T03:40:00.001+05:30

Sometimes, all it takes to write a story is one idea which can develop into a series of thoughts....and finally you have your story. In my case this happens usually when I am travelling...many times I have had this urge to write something while travelling in Trains....so, here's one of my first stories...to be exact written in Summer of 2005 while travelling to Mysore from Bangalore....

(Click on that underlined subject...it will take you to a location where you will find the story)

Down the Road...

2007-04-17T02:52:00.000+05:30

This one is the script for the first short film that we were supposed to make...although due to some technical problems we couldn't make the final 4 minutes film...anyway, here's how the stroy goes....

Down the Road...

“Dream big….it’s only when you dream big that you have the motivation to achieve something…

A person should always have dreams…..because dreams transform to action & action to reality.”

[The guy opens his eyes & comes out of the room…]

[Looks around for sometime & then stares at the Sun & again looks around]

[He goes and splashes some water on his face…]

“Hi….I am the guy next door and this is my story and maybe one of yours too.”

[Now, he walks down the road looking at his surroundings]

“Everyday I walk down this road, wondering if this is gonna lead me to a new destination.”

[He sees a crossing infront of him.]

“But always there’s this choice to be made. You wanna know what I do day after day? I follow the same route…life’s much simpler that way….as we are told from times unmemorable.”

“The question is what would you do? What would you do to make your life different?”

[He takes the road towards sky and on the way he sees some birds and clouds]

“I wish I could fly like them…I wish I didn’t care about anything & simply sway with the wind. I always wonder what they wanna tell us. But I later figured out there can be so many interpretations that it’s impossible to follow one. If you say it’s all science then so be it…but what if they tell us something. You can never be sure.”

[He sees the time & later the mobile phone. There are no calls.]

[He looks at the clock tower now.]

“That clock always reminds me a question someone asked me.

What’s the most exciting thing that you wished never happened? And I said, “I wish there was no such thing as time; I wish there was no such thing as a clock ticking away. It does bring some exciting moments with every second, but why do you wanna get past the time so beautiful; a life so beautiful.”. “

[He walks to sky and orders something….this is the first time the protagonist says his first dialogue]

“Pappu….ek maggi aur ek double chai.”

[He goes and sits in the lawns and looks at his mobile….again he talking in his head]

[He’s looking at a group of people who are laughing and chatting.]

“Why do I feel all alone in this huge group?

I feel all alone….

I was one among them sometime back, but what is it now? What am I even thinking???”

[He closes his eyes and there’s a dream sequence]

[Two people are sitting beside him and they alone talk; the main protagonist is sitting silent all the time.]

“You ask yourself too many questions my son. Be silent, ask yourself no questions and you will see how different things can be.”

[He is still silent]

“Did you understand what we are trying to tell you? Why don’t you talk? You have barely talked in the past few years with us. You have changed a lot. We never expected to see you in this state.”

[They go on and on with their thing….and in this scene some 4 more people enter the scene]

“You should listen to your parents. They care so much about you. They know what’s good for you.”

[Now the 2 member group starts speaking.]

“See…how many people are talking about you. They all care so much about you.”

[He’s still silent…now everyone starts shouting at him]

“What’s wrong with you? You think you can lead your whole life in a dream. Stop dreaming….start living in reality. Dreams are never true…they can never become true. Stop what you are doing…stop what you are trying to do…stop…”

[Suddenly the protagonist shouts…]

“Stop it...all of you. Let me ask you something since you seem to care so much about me.”

[All others stare at each other]

“What do you expect from me? What do you want me to do?”

[The 2 member group speaks now.]

“You are out of your mind. How can you ask such a question?”

“You are not answering my question.”

“That’s for you to decide… we don’t expect anything from you.”

[Saying this…they disappear]

“You…what do you want me to do?”

[They all stare at each other & they also disappear.]

“Where are you going? Answer my question….what do you want me to do? What do you want?”

[The protagonist opens his eyes…he sees the time and his mobile]

“Ah…the food is here.”

[He simply eats the food and walks away to his room.]

[He’s kinda feels elated…jumps and kicks his legs….Singing…goes away.]

[Final Voice over…]

“I had thought….that’s there’s no end to this … this life which doesn’t seem to change at all. I donno…I somehow seem to have an yearning to hear my mobile ring…every time I hear it ringing, I see that as someone acknowledging my existence in some part of the world. I feel happy that someone is thinking about me….but I wait….I wait…maybe too long.

We all wait for something to happen which would make our life interesting, but nothing happens & it’s the same story all over again. I don’t know if I see a light at the end of the tunnel. Even if I do…I wonder if I would recognize it. But if you do, the question is….what would you do? What would you do?”

***** THE END*****

Some of my favourite film reviews....

2007-04-16T06:33:00.000+05:30

this one seriously rocks...have never read such a review!!

Another review

2007-04-16T06:29:00.000+05:30

A review of a recent hindi movie...although the review of this movie has been quite differently presented in other websites and newspaper....but WTF....it's Rajeev Masand on CNN-IBN....i just lev him for his style and crticial analysis!!!....

10 reasons why you should stay awake all night.....

2007-04-16T06:27:00.000+05:30

Here's my list of 10 reasons why you should wake up all night atleast when you are in campus....[:)]

You have all the time in the world for yourself.
You can surprise yourself with the amount of thoughts that your brain will generate in this hour
Enjoy unbelievable speed on the net
Watch movies….chat a lot…read a lot…..and yeah of course for some…ghot a lot
Enjoy the silence of the night….there are very few things which come as close to be pleasant as this.
walk out of the campus for a chai with some ppl and put latcha about every damn thing possible
Watch the sky being spilled with the rays of a distant sun
watch the moon fighting its best to maintain its existence, but eventually losing out to the might of the sun
Watch the sky turn red with the rising sun
Finally….you can see some of your wingies wake up the next morning and wonder what has he been doing all night….little do they know what they have been missing….of course…they never bother to look into the other side of the mirror…hehehe…

Hunger....

2007-04-15T03:48:00.000+05:30

He woke up from a dream that there's plenty of food around. Little did he know that not everyone can afford it. He smiled at the Sun which was just getting ready to stretch its arms. The same scenes of people jogging...of dogs barking...of parents carefully dropping their kids in school...everything that he knew, everything that he had known all his life...it was the same everyday. He went to the tea stall and asked how much should he pay for one plate of Dosa...and was heart broken when he knew that he couldn't afford it. He needed to get some money....somehow...no matter what way he chose to follow...he needed to get money. He was too proud to beg from someone, although the whole world branded him...saw him...as a begger. He knew he was good at painting...but couldn't afford to buy brushes. Somehow managed to pick up some small pieces of left over pencils from the dustbin of a stationary and before he could choose many...the owner of the store drove him away.

He sat down to draw and after sometime, he thought he amused himself. He was pleased to know that he was quite capable of creating such a thing. He displayed it on the road for the public to see his work...but none would spot him on the road. It was as if he never existed...although his form is quite visible..blame it on his shabby clothes. He could see the day pass by way too quickly...he had to do something to get noticed. He shouted...he pleaded....he begged people to see his work. Finally a gentleman was kind enough to stop by and see the work...
"Did you really do all this stuff?"...
"Yes Sir. I did..."
"Are you planning to sell them?"
"Well, if you quote a good price...then definitely yes."...
"Hehehehe....I don't think you are a man who would wait for a good price."
"Ah...prejudice!..I might have dressed badly, but that's not who I am...See me in what I do...see me in my work...and not in these clothes...they mean nothing!"
"Well I think...I will come back later to buy them."

The gentleman said this after he was rebutted....There, he could see, his only hope of buying a dosa fading away...he could see one more night of starvation ahead of him...he went back to the stall and asked him if he could eat for the day and payback later. He got thrown away.

He couldn't take it anymore...he cried. "Why does the world think I am capable of doing anything? Am I not one of them? Am I not like them??..." he thought...and he kept thinking. What he didn't know was, there's always a sunrise....there's always a curve down the road which will change the path. He slept for the day...and to his surprise he didn't feel the hunger anymore. The next morning, he woke up and again the same things. Just that, today everything seemed in a very different manner....because the thought of him being hungry ceased to exist in his mind. He decided that he should be on a quest to change things all by himself....while he was walking down the same old route by the side of the park, the gentleman who had promised to buy the paintings stopped him and asked,
"Young man..I want to see your art again...I wanna buy them this time."
"What art?? what buying? Who are you? Stop bothering me...go away."

The gentleman was shocked...he had just seen the affect of indifference....he had just seen what can a man do, when he's hungry....he won't die of hunger...he would not stop fighting until the day when he shall no more be hungry....but then he wondered whether that day would be possible??!! because there are just too many things to be hungry about...

Three Movies that I would recommend you to....... not watch.....!!!!

2007-04-13T18:29:00.001+05:30

Yes, you read it right....I am going to write about three movies that I would not recommend you to watch. I am not saying that they are bad or anything...but I think, they give the whole process of movie watching a new perspective. It's a challenge to watch these movies and after having done so, you tend to wonder...how on earth could you tolerate that!!!...so, lets start on the saga of exploring some of the most challenging movies to watch.

1. Taste of Cherry: Released in 1997, this Iranian movie was directed by the critically acclaimed director, Abbas Kiarostami. The plot basically deals with a man named "Badii"who's driving near the hills of Tehran, always looking for something, with a purpose of his own. He interacts with few people while travelling across the terrains and asks them to come along with him on an errand for which he will be paying a lot of money. Some people agree and when they finally get to the spot where Mr. Badii takes them, they are shattered at his request. One of them runs away on hearing this request, another is too flabbergasted and starts quoting the verses in Kuran which says it's a Sin to do such a thing. The request which Badii makes to them is,....." You see that small hole there under the tree....I am going to lie down in that hole and commit suicide tonight. All you have to do is come the next morning at 6 and see if I am dead. If I am alive, please pull me back otherwise, throw earth on my dead body."!!!!....And finally he meets a person who gives him a personal account of what happened to him and how the taste of mulberries changed his life...(extremely symbolic!!)...and the story ends with what happens to Mr. Badii at the end.

The reason why I say that this is an extremely difficult movie to understand is that, although it seems very simplistic that there's a man who wants to die and wants someone to be there by his side...it's the journey the day before that makes us ponder lot of things. Why does he want to die? Why doesn't he stop by an average person on the streets of Tehran and take them along with him?...at one point, after he convinces a young Kurd to come along with him...he gives his explanation of how it's the duty of every Muslim to help his fellow Muslim....he questions the Kurd's beliefs. I guess that's what the movie is about...it questions your beliefs...it makes you wonder why is he doing, what he is doing??...Nevertheless...this 90 minute movie depicts a wonderful landscape of the arid mountains and the signs of development in the city.
Most of the scenes are shot from within the car, so that gives a clear picture of his journey of Mr.Badii....he's so emotionless in the movie!!...no anger, no pain...just blankness which makes you wonder, what had happened in his life which has made him what he is now....and to be honest all these questions came to my mind only after finishing the movie...because all through the movie i was cursing the pace at which the story is told....and why the hell does he drive the car so slow!!!....hehehe

2. Cries and Whispers: A 1972 Swedish movie directed by another acclaimed director, Ingmar Bergman, deals with the relationships within a family. This is the story of Karin and Maria who come over to look after their sister Anges along with the loyal maid, Anna. Anges is taken ill and she is not expected to survive for long...and as the story progresses, mysterious and often sad relationships are unravelled among the members of the family. Marie cheats on her husband and has an affair with their family doctor David. Karin is having a very unhappy marriage and Anges suffers from her perrenial illness. After sometime Anges dies and Maria and Karin who were not in talking terms with each other try to mend their relationship. Finally both the families decide that everything in the mansion would be sold and they would settle down in the nearby city.

What's so striking about this movie is the it's use of silence throughout the story. All you hear is a silence which is momentarily shattered by the cries of agony, of pain. Also each one's life is full of secrets. The film is also about inter-sibling rivalry. In what is told as a series of events using the stream of consciousness technique, we come to know how each one had distanced themselves from the other. Karin says, "Mother and Maria always had many things to whisper about, but then they were so alike. Jealously I used to wonder what they were laughing at together. Everyone was in gay spirits, I was the only one who couldn't join in the merriment," continuing, "Yet I could not help feeling sorry for her... and now that I'm older, I understand her much better. I wish I could see her again...to tell her what I understand... of her boredom, her impatience...her longing and her loneliness." Also towards the climax of the movie, we come to know about Karin's hatred towards Marie all these years and her agony and pain that nobody has touched her in years....in between all this is the character of Anna, who wants to serve her beloved Anges and she does care about her like her mother.... we see there's hope left in Anges when she's alive...always dreaming of the days when they were happy and dreaming that, that day would come again. To sum it up all about what Anges thinks about, she quotes, " Come what may, this is happiness…here for a moment. I can experience perfection.”

What makes me so impatient about this movie is it's use of long gaps of silence...makes me impatient to quite an extent. Also, the use of the colour Crimson Red for the majority of the scenes has a great spiritual meaning to it....no wonder it is rated among the Top 100 Spiritual movies of all time.....

3. Nostalghia: Imagine a Russian director who's way beyond anyone's understanding living in an exile...what do we have??!!!....The answer is "Nostalghia"...made in 1983 by Andrei Tarkovsky. The theme of the movie is more or less longing, your yearning for someone whom you love, something that you miss because you are so far away from it. The main protoganist, Andrei comes over to Italy to study about a 18th century musician who used to stay in Bologna in Italy. Accompanied by a translator named Eugenia, both of them meet a person named Domenico whom the villagers believe to be totally eccentric. But Andrei begins his conversation with Domenico and before leaving he kind of understands the feelings and the reason for Domenico's eccentric behaviour. Eugenia over a period of time develops a soft corner for Andrei but he doesn't respond, so she leaves to Rome to meet another man of her dreams. Before leaving Italy, Andrei remembers the promise he made to Domenico that he would try to carry a lit candle across the dried up pool in the village. At the same time, Domenico comes to Rome to deliver his speech about the imporatnce of dreams in one's life and in a shocking ending, he immolates himself....the story ends with Andrei successfully crossing the pool with the candle and him dreaming of his home.

Have to say, this has by far been the most difficult movie for me to understand...and quite frankly i still don't to a great extent. The whole movie is interspersed with surreal and dream like sequences which depict Andrei yearning for his loved ones in a far away land. What's more terrifying is that, it virtually throws a challange to those who watch it....challenging them to understand what is being depicted. Because it's so difficult....added to that, some merely unbelievable long shots...sometimes extending more than 5 minutes without any editing!!!....but nothing beats the last scene where Andrei crosses the pool...it's an uninterrupted 8 minutes and Forty Five seconds scene....it really gets on to your nerves after those 116 minutes of abstract stuff. Every dialouge uttered has got a deeper meaning to it...and sometimes it might take a great amount of research to know what the character is saying. Tons of symbols are used in almost every possible scene...and how can I forget Water....there's water in almost every scene imaginable!!!....All these makes me wonder how does he do it!!!....How does he do it? Where does he get all these thoughts and ideas from??...it's like a gift which rarely people have...can't really write much about the movie, because I guess it has to be seen to be understood...words just cannot measure its style of filming.

Having seen all these three movies...I can say that, understanding the respective director's psyche changes your perspective of watching their movies....beacuse each one of these movies...cannot be understood...they have to be felt!!!....That's exactly the reason why I would not recommend them to be watched as movies....I guess after reading the whole thing, you would agree with me that these are no movies at all!!!!....These are not movies....these are dreams brought onto the screen by wizards of creation....these are like paintings and modern art which cannot be explained to others...they have to be felt and interpreted...And that's the reason why I would not recommend these movies to be watched just for the sake of watching a movie...because that way, let me tell you they might seem to be so boring...that it's difficult to go past the first 15 minutes!!!.....so, understand the psyche of the director and prepare yourselves......fasten your seat belts and get ready to travel in a dreamland....a dreamland of immense philosophy, a different way of looking at life and ideas way beyond expression....and emotions way beyond words....because that's what this is all about.....Trust me, if you survive this, you will hear the power of silence!!!

Annie Hall (1977)

2007-04-13T03:17:00.000+05:30

Woody Allen's, 1977 flick "Annie Hall" is one of the few romantic comedy movies that carefully traverses between relationships and feelings for others without much of goofy/slapstick humour....it's very clever, the one which would make you smile for a long time. This Academy award winner comes in quite as a surprise right from the word go....especially the pace at which the dialogues are spoken. After adjusting your listening capabilities to the main protoganist, Alvy Singer (played by Woody Allen himself)...the dialogues from there on are so cleverly written that you wouldn't wanna miss anything. Here's a sample of some dialouges from the movie...

Mom: He's been depressed. - Suddenly he can't do anything.
Doctor: Why are you depressed, Alvy?
Something he read, huh?

Alvy:The universe is expanding.
The universe is everything, and if it's expanding...someday it will break apart,
and that will be the end of everything.

In another scene....

Girl: He kissed me!
Teacher: That's the second time this month! Step up here.
Alvy: What did l do?
Teacher: You should be ashamed of yourself.
Alvy: Why? l was just expressing a healthy sexual curiosity.
Teacher: Six-year-old boys don't have girls on their minds.
Alvy: l did.
Girl: For God sakes, Alvy, even Freud speaks of a latency period!

Another scene...Alvy is talking to his girlfriend Annie (Deane Keaton)

Alvy: You're having an affair with your college professor! That jerk that teaches that crap course, "Contemporary Crisis in Western Man."
Annie: "Existential Motifs in Russian Literature." You're really close.
Alvy: What's the difference . lt's all mental masturbation.
Annie: Now we're getting to a subject you know something about.
Alvy: Don't knock masturbation. lt's sex with someone l love.

"Annie Hall" is the story of Alvy and Annie who stay in New York....of how they meet and fall in love. And thereafter how their interests affect their relationships. After some months of on and off relationships, they realise that they still love each other...but one day after Annie's performance in a club, oppurtunity comes knocking at her door when some chap from a California's label company offers to record her voice for an album...so, Alvy and Annie go to Cali...Annie decides later that, she should carry on with the recording inspite of repeated requests by Alvy to come back to New York....Finally he comes back again to Cali after realising how sad his life is without her...but Annie refuses and insists that they can still be good friends....the film concludes with Annie moving back to New York and they meet each other and are still in good terms.

To some extent, it's also story of obsession...obsession to drive home your point, obsession to do everything perfectly...Alvy's portrayal of a man of 40, who has had bad relationships in the past and wants the present one to be a long affair is great. When I say great, I mean I have rarely seen a movie where someone talks so much about countless topics everytime there's a conversation. He just talks, talks, talks and guess what...you don't get bored of it...because he doesn't give you time to brood over it. And that's a good thing actually...you will know why, when you see this movie.

Another very important thing about this movie is the techniques used while filming. There are occasions where Alvy talks directly to the camera in the middle of a conversation, and scenes where Alvy is talking about his problems and thoughts and out of nowhere, he stops somebody on the road and asks them if they have a solution for it....also they transform themselves back in time to depict how life was in their childhood....

What does Allen say about relationships, " I think relationships are totally irrational, crazy and absurd. But l guess we keep going through it...because most of us want something out of it".

A nice movie and an interesting way of story-telling....do watch it...as Roger Ebert, the Pulitzer prize winning American Film Critic puts it...."it is Everyone's Favourite Woody Allen's movie"!!

L' Appartement (1996)

2007-04-12T17:54:00.000+05:30

I had read about this movie while reading about Monica Bellucci a couple of years ago. And I got lucky this semester...found this movie on DC++ last month. Finally saw this 1996, French movie last night. Here's my review or should i say what i liked in this movie....since i rate it as the second best French movie I have seen till now...topping that chart is another movie named " Amelie".

A romantic, thriller and a good amount of suspense...that's how i would classify this movie. The story revolves around 4 characters, whose lives are intermingled with each other. The film opens with a scene where Max is buying a wedding ring for his Fiance who's gonna marry him in sometime. Then on his way out, he meets his buddy Lucien who has been out of touch for quite sometime now. After their conversation, Max goes to a restaurant where he has a deal with couple of Japanese and we come to know that Max is on his way to Tokyo that same night. But before leaving that place, Max sees Lisa (Monica Bellucci), his estranged girl-friend and tries to follow her and finally gets to know where she lives. Finally the next day he goes inside her house to surprise her when she comes home....but to his surprise he comes to know that he has been following the worng woman...Alice....and then their lives are not the same again....

Revealing the story further would be a total injustice to this splendid story...more than that...the brilliance of story-telling. The film doesn't follow a particular chronology, but whatever chronology that we see in the film leaves a deeper impact. I don't think if the scenes were arranged in a proper sequence, it would have made a mark. Editing is very nice and also the transition of one scene from another. Acting is nice...since each character brings out the emotions of what they are going through...be it a person who's trying to find his lost love; a person who's trying to fall in love; a woman who doesn't really understand whom she loves the most and the other woman...personally i felt this one was the best....the one who's desperately waiting for the person whom she is in love with, but when he's finally with her she doesn't tell him the truth....untill one day where their lives and dreams are shattered and they move on.

This is a story of fate....of how fate determines the turn of events. It is also a story of, how far can you go to get the person you love. With a rather unexpected ending, where I still wonder couldn't it have been otherwise...but later i tell myself that's how life is. You really cannot do much about it...just going with the flow expecting that it would all end well...as it is supposed to be. Please do watch this movie....you will enjoy it....if not anything, guys, you can drool over Monica Bellucci...she looks so babe in the movie!!!!

To put it one sentence..." It is a Jig-saw puzzle which is beautiful even though, it's not set in a proper sequence. Because that's life."

Verdict: MUST WATCH......

Movie Mania....

2007-04-12T16:19:00.000+05:30

There are few people around us, who call themselves as aficionados...about music, games...MOVIES etc...and i can comfortably put myself into the movies category. Thanks to the presence of hundreds like me on campus, there's never a shortage of cinema and the more encouraging of all this is that...no longer do we amuse ourselves by watching Regional and English movies...we are kind of exposed to world cinema as well. In campus, a general observation is that people like Korean movies and other languages...i don't think they would take that risk, unless someone recommends it. But there are always those who don't wait for others...they just do it in case of cinema. and maybe i am one of them too...

Once, a friend of mine asked me how can you watch all these foreign movies where you have to carefully follow the subtitles; once you skip a dialouge or don't follow something...everything else doesn't make any sense? Well she did have a point there...and i came up with an analogy, i don't know if it was silly..but this is what i had to say, "For me, Cinema is like an ice-cream...if you like ice-cream...you just really don't care about what flavour it is....of course over a period of time...you start categorising which flavour you like more....so, language is never a problem as long as the basic storyline is good."

Another time, while chatting with another friend, i said these words, "Cinema or movies....is of three types....
1) Movies which you can watch with friends on one of those hangout days with popcorn and cola in your hand.
2) Movies which you have always wanted to watch.
3) Movies which your friends or someone else recommends you to watch because they thought it was good.

Anyway, I guess in these last 30 days of my glorious college days, i hope i can as many movies as possible...don't really care about all that scientific stuff that...you will strain your eyes...and also what few might say that...watching too much stuff will make you go crazy...because I tell you what....believe me i am not wasting any time....this is also a hobby too...like playing cricket, reading books, collecting stamps....I love what i am doing....i don't see a reason why i should give it up at all in first place....

I love watching movies...because it's such a powerful medium to interact with the audience....it's one place where your dreams come alive...having said all this, give me one good reason why people should not watch movies??!!!

It's all about the Resume....

2007-04-12T04:32:00.000+05:30

The other day, i was walking with a friend of mine and came across this bunch of guys who were having, one of those discussions over a cup of tea...and what i heard made me think for sometime. I remember, when i was sitting in the same place some 3 years ago, the discussion would go no further than who's the hottie on campus, nice gossip, who's hooking up with whom...you know one of those things which would light up your mood over a cup of chai...

But something has changed or maybe i have been blind to the change that's been taking place. Maybe this is not a universal thing...maybe there are still some people who have discussion like we used to have some time back....but invariably, every discussion these days should atleast have some topic of how the academics are going on...and friends meticulously guaging the number of problems that they have done from different books...(sometimes even sending the other chap into a frenzy when he realises that his counter-part has studied more than him)....and how pathetic or how wonderful the classes are going on...and most surprising of all the things....is one chap saying to another chap...dude, lets write a business plan...it would look good on the resume!!!....

Then i realised...that's the whole point...that's the whole point why we study for those 4 years...just 4-5 lines in your resume which would show that you have done something...or atleast pretend to have done something. For a moment, I thought if we could do something without considering that it would look good on the resume...I didn't have an answer immediately; but I am sure there is one...that's why i am still searching for one.

By the way, I seriously had no clue how to explain this thing about placements to a curious first yearite....after giving him a glimpse of how it is in psenti-sem...i wondered why he was asking me in the first place..that too in his first year....true that 4 years are actually too short in this place provided once you get used to its style of living...But i wonder what that chap could be doing now...maybe start doing all that quant and DI...and also vow to make 10's every sem...you never know...!!!

afterall, whatever we do....has to do something with making your resume more attractive!!

Animal Farm...

2007-04-12T04:11:00.000+05:30

The last time I read a book was I guess 7 months ago; this book named "Kite Runner"....a brilliant work portraying the coming of age of two friends under the cultural impact and later the terror of Taliban in Afghanistan...and today, something struck me and I sat down to read again properly without any disturbance. And it was "Animal Farm" by George Orwell...

I was actually glad that i was reading a book which was not more than 100 pages long...so, would complete it in 2 days or so...and given the reputation this book has in the literary circles, I thought it would be something which would advocate strong philosophy or the point of view of the author...
But it turned out to be quite a thing after i read it...took me around 3 hours to read the book, i still can't believe why i wasn't watching a movie or playing songs while reading it.

Thanks to the writing style of the author, there is not much to be pondered upon while reading the book. Of course, it's highly political and a very subtle current passes althrough out the story about the world politics during world war...but it's never said so. The kind of langauge that the author uses is what baffled me the most...quite simple to understand and contemplate and even the pace at which the story moves is good enough to keep you engrossed till you finish the book...quite inspiring actually for all those who want to write some good stories. I mean, this is a good example of how to keep things simple, yet drive home the point.

Revealing about the story wouldn't make much of a sense...b'coz it's clear that, it's not the point at all. it's the satire that one must understand and brood over. In a nutshell, the story could be described as Power is what distinguishes the mediocre and those who have it.....as Orwell puts it, "All Men are born Equal, but some men are more equal than others".

Highly recommended...

The Others-1

2007-04-05T21:07:00.000+05:30

I am back...i guess there are no better words to describe my long absence on my blog...hehehe...i am putting down this story that i wrote some days ago...hope you will enjoy this one...please do....leave your comments and suggestions

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DISCLAIMER: All Characters in this story are fictional; any resemblence to a character living or dead is purely coincidental and unintentional....

Also, some part of this story is influenced from one of my favourite movies, "Iruvar" by Mani Ratnam....so, the movie plot that you will subsequently read here is my tribute to that movie; although some things have been altered to suit the present story....this is to convey the message that there is no plagarism and i would let the story speak for itself....hope you will like this one...

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THE OTHERS

- Hemanth Kumar

What is it you ask from God every time you pray? Health, Wealth, Peace??!!!....to be honest, I don’t want all that…and I really don’t know what I should ask Him every time; but somehow I am left with this empty feeling that my prayers have been missing that special element which would make all the difference.

I walked out of the temple that day with the same old feeling and this time I had decided to come with a proper request that I would pray for, next time.

“Ah…here you are. I have been looking all over for you. Come here and help me out in the kitchen.” My mom was telling me as soon as I stepped in my house.

“Come on Ma… I don’t have time for that, remember, I told you that I wanted to go to this movie with my friends.” Saying so, I rushed out of my house. Actually I did have time to help her out, but was too lazy to do the daily chores…

“Macha…you got all the tickets kya? We are total 11 in number.” We started looking around and saw that Raja was missing from the group.

“Shit man!!!...this bugger ditched us this time too. Asshole, he must be hanging around with his new set of friends…” some of my friends were bitching about Raja.

“Yeah dude…why wouldn’t he??...these days he’s surrounded by chicks almost all the time.” Right at this moment, Raja walked in with some group of gals and few guys. He waved at us when he saw us in the cinema hall.

“Ah…brilliant. Just in time…sorry da, couldn’t help it; those gals wanted to come along at the last moment, so couldn’t say no to them.” We were literally growling at him.

“Anyway, I shall catch you guys later…seeya.” Saying so, he went away along with his gals.

“Did you see that??...I am telling you something is wrong with him…well, maybe I should say something is different about him now. He behaves as if he has got this halo around him! Macha…I really don’t understand why he is putting some much weight around these days…” these were some of the quick murmurs I heard as soon as he left us.

“Leave all that da…maybe he’s not doing that after all. We are just thinking too much about it. We don’t see him around that much, these days, that’s it! Now since when did that become equivalent to avoiding us?” I started saying. But, something was not right with what I said. I realized that maybe I was trying too much in defending him…too much actually.

“Phew…lets get inside, the movie is gonna start in sometime, we shouldn’t miss the beginning.” And the movie began.

“There is something wrong! Don’t you people realize that? We don’t have the rights the same way as people in other part of the country have. What should we do? What should we do?”

The people who had been listening to their leader talking all this while, started shouting in unison, “Revolution!!!”

“Yes… that’s it…we need another revolution. A revolution which would make our point very clear…a revolution which would make our voices heard in the capital. I can see that happening already. I can see that happening right here. In your eyes…I can see that revolution. Now, tell me, are you with me in this revolution?”

He was expecting a reply but he was amused to see all the people running towards a convoy of cars which had come just then.

“Please make way…please make way.” The supporters of actor Kumar were screaming at the hordes of people who wanted to catch a glimpse of their favourite actor.

“Ah…how blessed are we to have your presence here. “

“My dear people…this is a great day for all of us. God has answered our prayers and he has sent his messenger to finish the task that we wanna do. I present before you the man who’s gonna be our face for the revolution…Filmstar Kumar”

There was uproar all around…a different kind of uproar which Kumar had never seen. He could see the people go on rampage just to hear his voice and catch his glimpse. The whistles were gone now. He could see their eyes filled with hope that life would change. And they placed their hope on this newly proclaimed messiah…

“What I see here today overwhelms me. For the first time I can see a wave so big that it has the power to become a tsunami. Not the one which kills people….the one which has the zeal to unleash its power and those who don’t yield to its power would get washed away. This should send out a warning to all those who neglect us! Let there no longer be darkness in our lives…let there no longer be sorrow in our lives…are you with me in this quest??”

“Yes….Yes….Yes”….that was all what everyone could hear.

“To the revolution!!!” Saying so, all the people on the dais stood up holding their hands in air together….and there were claps around….claps….

“Macha…pass me that coke na” “…dude you want some??”

Mr. Kumar is leading the election by more than a lakh votes…there was an announcement in the counting centre.

“What are the results from other places?” Reddy asked his commander-in chief, Naidu.

“Everything is going as planned Reddy garu. We are leading in most other places. Clearly we will have a majority to form the government.” Naidu explained to his party-head Reddy.

“Ah…yes.”

By the end of the day, the results were out and there was celebration in Reddy’s camp. They had won by a huge margin. But one room in the office was filled with all the silence in the world. A silence whose outcome would shatter someone’s dream…a dream which drove him to achieve what some people thought was impossible.

“What do you say? Both of you are like two eyes for me. I can’t really say which one is more favourite. But we can’t sit silent all day. Someone has to be ready to come second.”

Naidu looked into the eyes of Kumar. And both of them smiled at each other…it was not a gesture, but a compliment that neither of them had anticipated that they would have to make such a decision.

“It’s upto you Reddy garu…whatever you say.” Both of them had reached to this conclusion.

“You have again put me in a fix. Hehehe….I would have never dreamt of anyone other than Naidu to be my successor; but we have changed our course in this election. We went by a new strategy named Kumar this time. There’s no doubt that your star power helped us win this time. You are the face of our revolution…of everything we wanted to be. “

But Naidu couldn’t stop what was going in his mind to come out of his mouth.

“But I worked so hard for all this…all these years.”

“I understand all that Naidu….but you have to understand one thing, if we don’t declare that it’s Kumar who’s gonna be the next CM then we might lose the people’s support. It might destroy everything that we fought for. You will be the Home Minister…always the most trustworthy person around. What say??”

Naidu couldn’t refute Reddy’s claim. And he smiled in meek submission. And there it was…Kumar was declared the new leader.

Things which were not supposed to be forgotten were lost. Those we wanted to build an empire got crushed under the weight of the new dreams. No one realized how strong the pillars were nowadays. Kumar’s popularity soared and everything that Naidu dreamt to be, he found it in Kumar. He was almost there, but maybe he wasn’t destined to be “The One”…he just remained one among “The others”.

“Macha…I shall see you tomorrow da…don’t forget we have that class tomorrow.” I bid my friends good-bye for the day and went home.

The Others-2

2007-04-05T21:06:00.000+05:30

Days passed by and things changed a lot. I was missing a lot of things…missed how I used to smile sometimes….missed how people used to talk to me once. Then one day, a thought struck me, maybe I should change. I should change because if I don’t then no one would recognize me anymore. I would be just a memory of the past which has no meaning…at most maybe a good thing to have happened in someone’s past. But then I wondered what should I change to make myself different? Is it my clothes, the way I talk, the way I behave?? Or is it the way I see things??...

I wish I could be a super hero, who could solve every problem in a jiffy…I wish I could be a versatile genius whose talent would make others jealous!!!...but I was neither of what I wanted to be.

One day, I was sitting by the side of Raja and then some more of his friends joined us. We started talking about so many things, but I chose to be a silent spectator. I wondered at the depth of knowledge they had on various things, to be honest it literally made me feel small in front of them. I wondered how someone could be so intelligent. I tried to add in a point or two, but it didn’t make a difference….or should I say, it wasn’t the point, but I didn’t make a difference in the conversation…hehehe… I was there all the time, but no one would pay attention to me…no one would see me…no one would listen to me… that was the day I was a ghost!!!

Ghosts…ghosts…they are everywhere. Just that the ghosts don’t say or realize that they are ghosts. Everyone lives under the pretension that everything is going alright. There’s no need to any change. But then is it the case??? Or am I asking the wrong question?

Raja was good at singing. Infact that was the thing that brought us together. I would say I was his first admirer. And ever since he started practicing professionally, I was his best supporter, always there for him and admiring him for everything he was doing. I wished I had a voice like that…and one day the dream came true...not mine, but his. He sang infront of a huge audience; it was our college cultural fest. And I saw his face that day…his eyes filled with pride of achieving a dream…a dream which was burning in both our hearts…to be recognized….and he piped me on this one…he piped me. Anyway I was happy that he became a celebrity of some kind in college and that I was his best friend. Actually people just know me as the chap who hangs out with Raja most of the time…nothing more, nothing less…isn’t that good enough, I asked myself? And I know there’s an answer. Just that, I have to search for it under this pile of bizarre thoughts which always seem to lead me to a new conclusion…one that is most of the times not expected.

Things went on like this for quite sometime and then something happened that day…something which I hadn’t anticipated. I woke up with this feeling of being incomplete. Not that it was a bad dream that morning….the problem was it was an incomplete one. Hehehe…I was this firm believer of the concept that dreams early in the morning always come true. I kept on thinking about that…I couldn’t recollect anything. But I didn’t give up; I kept on thinking about it for quite a while. Finally, I gave up.

But wait...there was still one last hope. I remembered the promise I had made God that I would ask for that one thing which was missing in my prayers. I knew this was the one thing I wanted to ask Him. I closed my eyes and praying God. I…I…

I saw Him…in my prayers.

“Who are you?” I asked.

“Well, you just called me. How can I help you my son?”

“I…I…saw this strange dream my dear God. I don’t know what that was. I have never felt this way, but somehow I feel that the most important thing for me is to know what my dream was. Do you know what it was?”

“Hehehe…my son; it’s your dream. How can I see it?”

“But…but you are God. You know everything.”

“I know everything…because you believe I know everything. It can be the other way too.”

“No…no…that can never be the case. You like to play around, don’t you? But, I seriously want to know what my dream was.”

“Well…well, let us see what your dream is…you were walking on the road and someone stabbed you from the back.”

“No…No…I am pretty sure that’s not the dream.”

“You were falling down from the top of a building?”

“No…”

“Then what is it?” He asked

“That is what I am asking you…that’s what I came here for. Ah…yes, I remember something vaguely; I was in this party…everyone was laughing and having a good time. I turned my head and found more people came inside the room. Suddenly my voice wasn’t clear any longer…the people around me were talking to me, but I couldn’t hear what they were saying. I suddenly felt everything was going blind infront of me…and I started running hither-thither till I turned into the direction where I saw the door…then I…I don’t know what happened after that. What happened after that, dear God?”

“Well…I don’t know. I didn’t have the permission to see your dream. You didn’t let me see it completely. You opened your eyes…why did you do that? “

“I don’t know…I really don’t know. I tried to look closely at the surroundings, it was something that I had never seen, I didn’t know anyone around. The only person whom I could recognize in my dream was me…”

“How do you know it was you?”

“It was me…I saw him.”

“It was just a dream…wasn’t it?”

“Yup…it was just a dream. But, it was me.”

“So…now you wanna know what happened to you in your dream.”

“Yes…Yes…I want to know what happened to me.”

“You, want to know what you did after that? Well…you got up and closed your eyes and started praying God to help you.”

“But, that’s what I am doing now….”

“Exactly…that’s my point.”

“I didn’t understand you…”

“Hehehe…the day you understand what I said, you won’t ask me that question.”

“So…should I wait for that day?”

“I don’t know…but I will be waiting for an answer….”

I opened my eyes…and looked around. I walked into the crowd which was oblivious of my presence; actually I was just another face they would come across. But that’s not a reason good enough to remember me. Isn’t it? I have to do something that would break the anomaly in their lives…otherwise I am just another person. There in the crowd, I think I saw the same face…the face of Naidu from the movie the other day. I couldn’t understand why. I wanted to see if it was for real and that I wasn’t dreaming. But the face just escaped into the crowd.

The Others-3

2007-04-05T21:01:00.000+05:30

“Dei …here he comes.”

“Where were you dude? We have been waiting for you.”

“Well, I was just coming from home da…had some work at home.” I knew I had lied. I didn’t know why, “Anyway, where’s Raja; he said he would join us without fail.”

“Ah…here he comes. Finally you made it.” My friend referred to Raja who had just joined us.

In the course of discussion, I kept on looking for questions. Questions of all kind…why were we having that discussion after all; why was it so important than so many other topics? What’s gonna be the outcome of that conversation?....

Isn’t that strange? Why should someone look for questions? I think answer is just a matter of time if you have the right question. And based on your question, your answer changes every time you ask a different one. There are so many different interpretations of the same thing. Which one would you say is the right?

Maybe everything is right…but some things are more right than others….

“What happened dude? What are thinking so deeply?”

Raja broke my string of thoughts. And everyone was looking at me, expecting a reply. But I didn’t say anything; there’s always this mask…this smile which would assure that everything is alright. It’s a good technique…you should try it out too…they say you don’t lose anything if you smile!

I was looking at Raja now…was looking at his brilliance in talking to others…it’s like he was born with this charm that I always craved for….

“What makes you think, you are better than me?”

“What are you even talking about?”

“You know…everything. Just about everything...”

“Who said, I am better than you?”

“Everyone seems to believe that.”

“You sure that’s what everyone thinks? Or is it what you think?”

“I donno what to think…”

“So, you let others think on your behalf. Is that what you would have wanted? I am your friend dude. Ever since I have known you, I have never seen you with this state of mind? What’s wrong man?”

“What do you even care? It doesn’t matter what I think.”

“It matters to me…it matters because I am apprehensive that some of your conclusions might not be what they are in reality.”

“What is reality then?”

“I donno…what’s reality. But I can see that something is eating you up from inside. Something which you can’t let go in my presence. What is it? What is it?”

“I am just jealous…I am just jealous.”

I started speaking after a long void of silence. That broke the anomaly. Suddenly the ghost had woken up…it was no more a ghost now.

But the time in which I spoke those words was so wrong that my friends started questioning me if I was day-dreaming about something.

“I meant I am jealous that you hang out with so many girls…I wish I could do the same.”

“Aha…the cupid is sharpening his arrows…hehehe….sure man, I will introduce you to few gals, someday soon. I wanna see what you do.” He gave one of his evil laughs after that. And the rest joined him….

I wore my mask again…I smiled too.

I went home after our meeting and silently ate my food and went to sleep. But I couldn’t sleep. I walked towards the window to have a look around the city with its zillion lights. The wind brought with it some new fragrance of the moon lit night. And I turned towards my bed.

“Oh…shit!!!...Who the hell are you? And what are you doing in my room?” I had almost fallen back when I saw someone in room.

“Fear not my son. I can’t harm you. I came here because you wanted to see me.”

“I wanted to see you??...I don’t even know you; why would I want to even see you?”

“Are you sure, you haven’t seen me? You saw me in the movie the other day, I was Naidu. You saw me on the street the other day, whom you wanted to follow, but later gave up looking at the thousand other similar looking faces.”

“Ah…yes, now I remember. So, which one of them was really you?”

“Both or neither…whichever you believe is true.

“Ah…but why did you come now? I never called you or wanted to see you…”

“Hehehe…don’t be silly. You know that you have been thinking about me all the time. You think about me when you are alone…you think about me when you are with your friends.”

“What rubbish? I just saw you on screen for couple of hours…that’s it!”

“Are you sure about that? Maybe I am everything that you have been dreaming about. I am your thought itself…I am you.”

“You are me?? Then who am I??”

“Isn’t that obvious…you are me. Just that the difference is that, you are a ghost even though you are real…and I am a ghost in reel.”

“But that’s not true…I am in a way quite different than what you are.”

“What difference does it make? After all I am the apparition of your thoughts. The mask that I am wearing doesn’t make me different, no matter what we do; we are all the same.”

“I don’t believe you…”

“You can’t escape the truth…and the truth is…”

“Whatever it is, I don’t wanna know…”

“Hehehe…then don’t. But I will tell you what others say about it…the truth is everything that you are running away from. Truth is everything that you don’t wanna know. They say Truth is light; it will overwhelm you because you will no longer have to wear the same mask over and over again.”

“Stop it…stop it…”

“The question is what are you running away from? What is that you don’t wanna know?”

“No…I don’t wanna think or know what you are asking me. But do you know the answer to all that?”

“Neither do I…Didn’t you realize that I was you?”

“Wait…wait…where are you going? You can’t leave me…wait…wait.”

I could see myself confused…confused with the burden of unanswered questions. Anyway, I didn’t want to know any of those. I was happy till then…atleast that’s what I thought. I don’t wanna know the truth which would supposedly enlighten me. Whatever it is…I don’t care. I don’t want to break the anomaly to walk down the path of reality.

The next day I woke up…I didn’t have a dream. And I met my friends and Raja like I did everyday. I was still jealous.

And like everyday…I kept looking for questions. But one day, I chose the other way round. I got an answer….I got an answer that

“All Men are born equal, but some are more equal than others.”

I don’t know if that was my destiny…I don’t know if that was reality. All I knew was to try to keep searching…searching for things unknown, searching for things that were always in dreams….searching for things that you always wished for. And every time I came across some new thing, I wanted to know if this was the end. But I didn’t have an answer…so, I kept searching.

I want to be equal…that equal that I have always dreamt of. I don’t want to be the ghost around. It makes me quiver because one day when I am not the ghost anymore…I look back and I see my tracks missing.

I know this….I can feel it too…

I am almost there, but maybe I wasn’t destined to be “The One”…I just remained one among “The others”. But I don’t stop…I keep walking.

Is it worth it?

2006-09-19T16:40:00.000+05:30

Time: 8:00 AM
Channel-A

Good Morning....Today's Headlines......

>PM meets Mussharf in Havana.
>Tensions escalate in middle-east
> Angry protests over Pope's remarks
> WI win the ODI against Aus....

Now take another channel B for example which is telecasting news at the same time.....

good morning....Today's headlines......
>PM meets Mussharaf in Havana.
> Girls win over college administration in Chandigarh.
> Minister fined for travelling without a ticket.
> Sting operation exposes xyz in UP.
>
>
I think these are some of the common things that we come across in day to day life. what i mean to say is, how different news channels see different things as matters of national importance!!! Isn't there a limit to all the crap that we get to see in so many news channels. Thank God there are some specialized channels like Business channels, Cartoon Network and NGC/Discovery types.....otherwise it is the same old boring crap repeated over and over again.....and then there seems to be a new trend where the common man can voice his opinion.....through SMS. recently in one of the episode of "Laughter Challenge" there was a reference to these incidents which I would like to quote here......

"On a day not too far from now....the CEO of a newschannel was unhappy that his team was not doing enough to get all those "Exclusive" videos and "Flash" news, so he comes up with a plan to boost up the viewership of his channel; to telecast an incident before it even happens!!!!"
you must be wondering how this is possible???....Let us just for few minutes imagine that the channel goes ahead with this decision and later that day there is a kidnap scheduled to happen.....a girl is to be abducted by some goons and the newschannel comes to know about this. then the incident will be something like this.....
"Good Morning.....welcome to our special show...."Kabhar se pehle kabhar" . Today we will show you the girl who is going to be kidnapped exactly 5 hours from now......see this girl carefully; she's so young, so innocent, but she will be kidnapped by some goons without any kindness. This is an exclusive report.....let us take the opinion from the girl herself....."Mam....mam...you are going to be kidnapped in another 5 hours...how are you feeling about this?" The Girl says," well....i am kinda tensed, i have been told that i will be kidnapped; but they haven't specified how and who will kidnap me. i am really very excited, but i guess i would prefer if the goons don't use any knives because i am scared of sharp objects."......"That was the girl who will be kidnapped in another 5 hours by goons who will not see that she's so young and innocent....but will kidnap her in another 5 hours without any kindness.......this is XXX with Cameraman YYYY from Mumbai".

Studio: Thank you Mr.XXXX for your update on the incident which is going to happen later today. we will stay in touch with you throughout these tense moments. You, the viewers can also participate in our show, please send in your comments and letters to this address....."crap....crap.....crap...."....which leads to our question of the day...."What instrument will the goons use to kidnap this girl? A.Knive B.Pistol C.Lathi D.none of the above.....please remember the girl had earlier told us that she's afraid of Knives and other sharp objects.......you can see this in our exclusive footage....(scene repeats.......scene repeats....scene repeats.......until a wise thought knocks your head to shut down the crap and change over to something worthy.....)

Well maybe this programme hasn't yet invaded the channels, but going by the current trend that day will not be too far. I am baffled when i see the content of these so called 24*7 News channels......don't they run out of things that they can show!!!!! I guess this is exactly why there is so much of crappy repitition and all the worthless things that are picturised as matters of national importance. Check this out......

1.In the past few days i have seen reports about a snake which was chasing a young chap apparently to take revenge on him!!!! and later it was pacified after the villagers follwed the suggestions of a Baba...!!!!
2.In a village not too far from Delhi....people believe that some ghosts have occupied the police station.
3. In a village in Gujarat, people are not allowed to sing Himmesh resshamiya's tunes because a ghost haunts those who do it!!!!......(it is another matter that i seriously wish that ghost directly goes and sits in his studio, atleast that would prevent him from singing all that crappy songs...[:)]

and so on!!!!....In an attempt to show all these so called "exclusive" reports people go just too far to potray some of the most trivial matters as matters of national importance. it is high time we realise the job of media is just not to create sensation but also suggest/raise an issue which needs to be seriously looked upon. it is high time, that we realise that media ought to be an eye opener and not just an encyclopedia of human lives. is it really worth spending so much time getting all these things infront of people???.....is it really worth seeing all these sensational things???.....Is it really worth thinking about all these things???....Is it worth it???......

then an idea knocks my head and i become wise again......i switch on to HBO.....[:)].....alas!!! has been blocked in Maharshtra for apparently showing "A" rated movies......i wonder if the high court knows that there are more number of 18+ population than the people who whom this law is supposed to protect....[:)]

Misinterpreted......

2006-09-19T14:48:00.000+05:30

There is perhaps no other process like "Interpretation" which can influence a society or country. What we are seeing in the past few years in the world around us is the consequences of the "interpretation" of an incident. One group which i would say largerly responsible for this process is the Media.....these are the people who interpret the incident or news in the so called "best interest" of the people, without a single clue that the people that they are blaming are also watching the channel....for example take the example of the American Media. Long ago they termed the word "terrorist", maybe initially it was used in a very politically correct manner as someone who has no shape, no religion, no country whose sole aim is to terrorise the community.....but these days, i am very sad to say that things which were not supposed to happen are happening....now the terrorist has a name....he has a form....he has a country....he has a religion...[:(]. The media goes a long way in expressing their views when some incident happens...again as an example take 9/11 attacks....YES...that was a very inhumane act....nobody has a right to destroy another person's life....no religion teaches you to kill someone else....no country has a foreign policy of killing others, but look at the aftermath of those attacks. It was interpreted as an "attack on America's Independence" and that every human being in that country was in danger; instead of safeguarding the country from within, the incident gave a great excuse to wage a war on some remote country thousands of miles away where the only thing that grew was "Opium"!!!!.....In what one can term as the futuristic approach, applying the principle of "Prevention is Better than Cure"....this world super power was on a mission to destroy the terror outfits and now some supposedly potential nuclear threats.....

What i fail to understand is the fact that we form an opinion on what others think about the issue....often there are sensitive issues such as religion, faith which are always under scanner.....take the issue related to christianity.....when the movie "da Vinci Code" was set to release there were protests all over the world....(and India especially) that it was against the religion; well maybe dan brown did or did not intend to mean that...but before we even the saw the movie or read the book, where the debate is obviously open ended it was interpreted as being against the religion. another recent issue were the remarks of Pope Benedict related to Jihad.....my knowlegde in things like these are very limited, but don't you think these issues are taken too seriously??....maybe Pope misinterpreted the facts of the original conversation of the 14th century emporer Byzantine with the Islamic teacher.......and this quote from the Pope might lead to forming an opinion across sections who strictly follow his words....phew!!!...Mind is such a complex creature...you never know what thoughts crop up and what plans will be made...

Why go to all these places around the world....take our own country; how many times have we seen politicians and celebrities say that their statement has been in "Misinterpreted" or "Misquoted".....take the example of channels like Aaj Tak, India TV, Star News....and newspapers like TOI which all boast of having a large viewership in most parts of the country....these are the things which are going to influence the mind of the reader.....it is really a serious issue when they write something on an incident..because love it or hate it.....you cannot ignore it. It hurts when media/newspapers come to their own conclusion depending on the opinions of the so called "elite" panel (i was shocked to read that the recent blasts in Mumbai were targeted mainly on Gujaratis...). Now please don't get me wrong, but i think it is really important what you conclude after reading a report or seeing something on TV......

Let us all hope that things like these don't effect us.....let us hope that these "misinterpretations" don't change our lives....let us hope that they don't change our world.....

long time....

2006-09-19T12:04:00.001+05:30

yup...it's been a really long time since i have blogged. Blame it on my schedule; though it's not that hectic but it definitely is kinda hard to get access to a comp...[:(]....Anyway things have changed a lot in the past few days, rather i have to see few months. Some good, some not so good.....first things first, i was pretty happy to know that all my friends have made some pretty nice jobs and also that my wing was the richest in the whole batch and Akki's wing was pretty close too....[:)].....hehehe....it is quite interesting rather curiousity i should say to stay in touch with all my friends in Bangalore, hyderabad and Pilani. And me in Pune which was pretty exciting in the starting few days. The city is pretty good to live in actually; it sort of has this urban India feel to it something close to Bangalore and Hyderabad. I had planned to explore the whole place in the initial few weekends and then keep the rest of the weekends aside for going to far off places like Goa, Nashik, Mumbai etc., This was until of course I realised that I was lagging behind in my prep for CAT. and everything changed in August. i began spending more time at home; made some nice friends, and mingled pretty well with a nice Tamilian family staying close to my house. And then there were my movies.....the watching spree was going in full throttle in the first few weeks and then started becoming very occasional though there was a continuous of movies through DVDs.....have to mention a point here; probably i saw some of the best Hindi movies in the past few days...starting from Guru Dutt's "Pyaasa", "Sahib Biwi Aur Ghulam" on DVD and in Cinema Hall......loved "Omkaara" and "lagey raho Munnabhai".
Chary has left for his MS to California, Garam to Toronto and pretty soon Apar too to some univ in England, Madhu to Germany.....after spending time with all these seniors I feel so nostalgic of all those good times...it also makes me think about the time not too distant in future when i will face a situation when i will be standing near the gate of some metropolitan Airport; and bid goodbye to friends who will soon soon leave for their job/studies. I guess everyone will have to encounter situations like these but it is the life after that which is quite puzzling without all those wonderful around. I think i am going through things like that almost everyday; not having too many people around, not much to talk about even with people whom i meet everyday. which is exactly why there seem to be too many things to talk about when you see a friend online or on the phone....alas! little do i know that they were too busy playing CS that time....hehehe....i must have disturbed so many guys who were at the peak of the level in the tournament....[:)].....

Maybe this sentence is sort of cliche' because every chap whom i come across says this.....these days even i have started thinking about it. we say, "It is so boring here da....i seriously want to get back to Campus".....maybe everybody lives under the same sky and they see the same Sun and Moon.....i guess it's a sort of feeling which is strong in each and everyone of us that makes us yearn for the college life. you may call it as "home away from home".....but i would prefer terming it as....perhaps the only place on earth where you are the boss of your own life...you can control the dynamics of almost everything around you...and also owe a lot to those around you...perhaps the only place where you feel you own your life....you live a life. I guess the scene from the movie "Shawshank Redemption" best summarizes my thoughts; yup i am talking about the letter which the old librarian sends to his friends back in prison and also the one which Morgan Freeman explains after he is released from prison.

life is full of little surprises and it is things like these that keep you going. perhaps there is no better thing than conversing with all the little people who matter.....there is no ego....no jealously....just a pure heart to heart discussion about everything that you can come up with.....i think this is exactly what one needs to learn in college.....it definitely help a lot in days to come, and i can assure that it will take you places.....it will prevent this "there are so many boring things around" idea from cropping up every now and then to a large extent. Which leads to the latest thing going in my mind......there are days when we rarely think about everything going around us....which is in a way Ok....but then there is something called as "Ripple Effect"....and also the "Chaos Theory"...which states that an incident can occur after originating from a different incident nowhere connected to it thousands of miles away.....something like the butterfly fluttering in one part of world can cause a typhoon in another part.......this is probably the inspiration to my next story that i am writing now named......."IT MATTERS......".

"IT MATTERS...."
...coming soon to your inbox......
Note: Not available in all territories (read as inbox)
Check Out your local listings for availibility....[:)]

Till then.....Good Day.....Hope you have a great time ahead......

Da Vinci Code....

2006-05-27T14:06:00.000+05:30

well...if you guys are eagerly looking forward to see this movie...i have few words for you...i saw it yesterday at home...well..you know, that piracy can come good sometimes especially when there were doubts if this movie would come out at all in the first place after all that controversy....

my rating:3.5/5

we should actually thank Ron Howard, the director for making this movie..exactly the way it is in the book.but somewhere down the line you get this feeling that you are not watching a movie but some sort of documentary in discovery channel.just that there are some big names in the cast and some chasing scenes the movie is like a moving version of the book..where every detail has been carefully explained. if you have liked the book...you will like this movie too but don't expect too much out of this moviewell, what stands out in the movie..hmmm maybe nothing at all..maybe the scene where Sophie is told what Priory of Sion is all about and the explanation about the Last supper is one exception
the movie doesn't need Tom Hanks or the beautiful Audrey Tautou who played the lead role in..."Amelie". because their talent doesn't create a magic for the film...maybe it adds on to the aura of the cast. forget for a moment that you are watching Tom Hanks acting like a God in..."Cast Away" or "Terminal"...i think you should see it is...Robert Langdon who's acting in the movie...overall..it's a good movie...nothing controversial at all....a fast paced book well shot..and oh yeah, forgot to mention...if you thought the character of Silas was scary like how they showed in...ads...well, think again...hehehehe...

THE "MEMOIRS".....OF THE "438 SYNDROME"...!!!

2006-03-14T16:45:00.000+05:30

What does this day mean to me?? Well..if I sit and recount the moments I spent on this day....maybe I will fall short of words….first when I got up, I was disgusted to see…TOI in my window instead of Economic Times. But everything has a purpose and I believed in that. I was sure that I wouldn’t find anything other than some crap written about some of the most unimportant things happening around us in the front page of TOI…but to my surprise….there was an article which completely took me by surprise. It said…this is the Platinum year of celebration of talkie movies in India…..it was exactly 75 years ago, that on this day, 12^th march, 1931 that “Alam Ara” India’s first talkie movie was released. The whole page had some interesting stats and analysis of the most famous films, most famous villains, and stars in their eras, movies that changed some lives, the highest earning movies and loads of other stuff…..as the time passed, I was eagerly awaiting for the moment when we, the English Press Club of BITS, Pilani will go out for a movie for the first time. Finally we ended up in what I shall describe later as my new found hangout, Lakshmi Talkies. I should say, it’s gonna be the PVR of Pilani, given the variety and frequency of new movies that we get to see these days in this cinema hall. I had talked to the owner some 2 days back and asked him to screen some English movies too. We promised him that he can expect a good BITSian turnout, especially during this time when there are no tests. So….on my request he agreed to show, “Memoirs of Geisha” and “Crash”. The day when we went there….they were gonna screen the first movie. I had seen few trailers of this movie and thought that it will be very interesting. Well by the end of the movie, I don’t know if I was bored or if the movie was not that good. That’s not the point anyway….all that matters is that…there was something that could make 20 of us to hang out on a beautiful Sunday afternoon and for that I shall never forget that experience. But as murphy’s law goes…”if something has to go wrong, it will”….yes, it holds true everytime….and on that day….an innocent and unexpected nail tore my pants on the left side…:)…..and while coming back from the whole…what I can say….a good outing…..i saw somebody…whom I was least expecting at that moment and whom I thought should be the last one to know what had happened to my dress…:)…but…I should say….there was no other moment more suitable than that….when I believed in the saying…”everything happens for a reason”…..i was so thankful to God….that it didn’t happen on my right side…hehehe…..:)…..

After I came back to the campus…..i was kinda shocked to see an empty C-lawns…a very unlike phenomenon especially on a Sunday evening…..and was wondering since when so many people had taken some interest in watching the India vs England test match in Mohali….and to add to my doubts, I heard loud shouts from the common room. Phew!,….i thought some things never change. I came back to the room and opened my laptop….and what I saw on the homepage was absolutely shocking…Aussies had made 434/4 at the end of 50 overs against South Africa in the last of the 5 match series and the series decider ….Ricky Pointing had made 165 runs in 105 balls…to take Aussies to the peaks of world cricket. It was right on top…..no other team had scored more than 400 runs in an innings since the time when Geoffery Boycott played the first ball of the ODI matches in mid 70’s. But I was on the Proteas side…..they have come a long way since 1992…when they made their debut in International cricket after their Independence. I think no other team in cricket can be as unlucky as South Africans….everytime when they were at the edge of a deserving win…..rain gods would create havoc and the %*@!ing Duckworth Lewis method would screw them so badly that victory will be miles away. For a quick recap….in 1992 world cup they were about to win in a match and the rain changed the whole equation…and thanks to D/L method the final target was….22 runs to win in 1 ball. Can you believe that!!....and in 1999 world cup, they lost the quarter finals to Australia….and later when both of them qualified for semi-finals…..something happened….something that should never have…..everyone who had seen that season of cricket wouldn’t forget to acknowledge the heroics of Lance Klusner “Zulu”….as he is better known as….he unleashed his power strokes, almost a baseball style of hitting the ball in every match of that world cup….and in that unfortunate semi-final due to the most unfortunate run out of his fellow team-mate in the final over…the scores were tied and the match was a draw. Now, the tragedy was that….Australia was declared as a winner because it had defeated South Africa in quarter finals. I will never forget that moment. These people have changed the way people play cricket in the past 14 years….their fielding was their trademark….i remember, sometimes I just used to see their matches to see how beautifully Jonty Rhodes, dives to catch a ball….:)

And today on 12^th march they had the most daunting task in their whole cricketing careers. What does it mean to chase 434 against the supposedly the most ruthless team in the world today??....what does it mean to win in front of that very same….Wanderers stadium crowd where India lost by 125 runs to Aussies in 2003 world cup finals??....i heard that the crowd was the most patriotic in the whole of SA here in this stadium….it would have been like…..India, playing against Pakistan in Eden Gardens….if I can draw a similarity. I was oblivious to all these things till the 25^th over of the South African innings, when finally I decided to see the match to see if my favourite team will be able to achieve the almost impossible task of winning the match??....when I entered the room….i found everyone jumping with joy…..Oh boy!. and why not….Gibbs was playing so well….he was playing like a God…..he reminded me of this headline when Sachin played against Pakistan in the 2003 world cup quarter finals….it said…..”Sachin does a Shiva-Thandava”…..i can sincerely keep my hand on my heart and say…Gibbs was something more than that…..:)…..every ball bowled was being scored…..4’s and 6’s seemed like a child’s play…..even though they were maintaining the run rate at over 9 per over, the required run rate was always over 8 per over. I joined the party and went with the flow…every run scored was being greeted as if it was the winning run….and why not…..how many times can you see a team scoring 245 runs in 25 overs!!!!....:)….

Finally in the 32^nd over the party came to a halt when Symonds got Gibbs’s wicket after being smashed for 2 consecutive 6’s….man….that was some moment….he walked like a Gladiator after killing the tiger!...he literally made the whole target seem so possible….i mean after all what was the equation??....136 runs needed in 18 overs….:)….and still there were players who could kick aussies ass..…:)…..but I should say…for the next 8-9 overs I was very much disappointed…no boundaries….even the runs were coming in only singles and some rare 2’s…..the asking rate escalated to 10 per over….i decided to walk out from the room but it was that one shot from….van der Wath which gave some hopes…..and there were 2 overs which went for more than 30 runs…Boucher was playing intelligently…hitting the required runs…and rotating strike…everything seemed possible now…..we just needed 1 good over to change the whole equation in favour of South Africa….then came Lewis….i donno which part of Australia he belongs to…but I shall have great respect for him for my entire life….he literally supplied the turbo power to Proteas….to go close to that winning target….how often can you see a bowler being smashed for 113 runs in 10 overs without any wicket…..:)….after the fall of van der wath came….Roger Telemachus….oh…boy he was good…he did his job and pushed SA closer to victory…..after his fall came Andrew Hall…..that 4 of his in the final over raised hopes further….from 435 to win in 300 balls….the equation had dropped to 7 to win from 6 balls…..this last over will perhaps be the greatest drama you can ask from the THE GREATEST GAME OF CRICKET ever played…..

50^th over: 7 runs to win…..6 balls remaining….2 wickets in hand….Boucher is on strike..

1^st ball: Boucher hits the ball hard…straight down the ground….but out of nowhere Brett Lee puts his leg to stop the ball….only a single taken. Andrew Hall is on strike….5 balls ……6 runs to win…2 wickets in hand.

2^nd ball: Hall strikes the ball for a 4…..everybody is dancing now….SA just 2 runs short of the greatest chase ever.

3^rd ball: Hall again tries to hit the ball for fence….but fails to connect it properly…and offers a simple catch…..SA….need 2 runs to win in 3 balls….1 wicket remaining…..Makhaya Ntini comes on strike….everybody knows that he cannot bat at all..

4^th ball: I think Zeus was pleased with the greatest effort of all time….and he lets Ntini to nick the ball to the third man…..the scores are tied now…everybody goes berserk… Boucher on strike now…SA need 1 run to win from 2 balls and 1 wicket remaining….

I am sure Boucher must have thought of the similar moment in the semi-final of 1999 world cup….and there was no way he was gonna goof up today and have that tag of “chokers” for eternity.

5^th ball: Boucher hits the ball over the mid-field…..for a 4…..he finishes his 50…but more than anything…..gives….SA the greatest victory of all time…..to me it was like….Achilles conquering the shores of Troy….

Finally….SA ended up making 438/9 in 49.5 overs to steal the victory …kicking Aussies ass……I loved that poster that a South African spectators was displaying…..”Proteas are gonna have…Kangaroo for Dinner….”….that was true…..it was a moment that defined everything that shock…happiness…tears….meant. I had lost my voice….perhaps…my use of the word….”*@%$”….’n’ number of times was one reason…..the moment was like that…just couldn’t help it…..it just meant everything for me…..it’s the reason….why Cricket rules!.....it’s the reason why Cricket is a religion….:)……I was reeling under the 438 syndrome……just couldn’t believe anything at that moment…..i can say…..”there comes a moment in our lives which doesn’t need words to describe itself….there comes a moment which we can remember for our eternity….there comes a moment which stands for hope in the darkest of the times…..it’s like watching…a beautiful starlit sky on a clear night….there at that moment you don’t need words to describe how beautiful things are….it’s like…..”…..for me….it’s this moment that I shall never forget……that is what my dear…I call as…..the 438 syndrome…..:)…..

the ideal 8....

2006-03-02T11:29:00.001+05:30

well....i have been tagged by akshaya...to write about my ideal match in 8 points....i am not sure, if i will be able to justify everything that i write...but i shall try to give a honest opinion...;)

1.undoubtedly, she should be a good cook....there's nothing better than you and your girl eating together and that too something that she has made for you....

2.she should be very caring..a teacher when i do something wrong...and be my shadow in every moment of joy and sorrow

3.linguistic, cultural and geographical differences do not bother me....sometimes that's the beauty of life....to be able to co-exist....and i will make a sincere attempt to understand her feelings for everything...but not sure if i will be able to do it.....the mind is so complex!!!....

4.she should know what she's doing...because i sincerely believe that talent in whatever form shouldn't be wasted and every action of yours should define who you really are......as Steve Jobs says...in one of his speech....life is too short....don't spend it living someone else's life.

5.wouldn't mind even marrying a gori from other country....i mean i have seen foreign women who look awesome in salwaar kameez in the streets of bangalore....but just for the record....i defintely have a soft corner for tamil brahmins...;)

6.should have a good taste for classical music....and if she can dance or sing or play veena/violin ...then it's an added advantage.

7.should be patient enough to bear with my unusual long breaks of silence....would be very happy is she doesn't do anything silly to break the ice.....

8. defintely should have some similar interests...esp movies, good food, travelling....and believe that we all exist for a reason...and that reason is going to design and shape our lives and nothing can be perfect in this world.... should consider what's the best in everything...and not find what's wrong with everything.....

now i tag saikat (pyshco)...to carry on this discussion....

WRONG TURN.......

2006-02-17T10:01:00.000+05:30

Wrong turn...as the name suggests, i am not gonna write about the movie in which the hero takes a wrong turn only to find out that they have to fight with mutated life forms in some remote place of USA.....this wrong turn, is my own personal experience and let me tell you i am happy that i took it...:)

it's been three years since i have come here to Pilani, to study and never in these three years have i gone to a world which is just outside the walls of BITS.....but on 13th feb, 2006.....something happened....something that would give me an oppurtunity what lies on the other side of our life. the Centre for women studies (CWS) in BITS, Pilani in association with One World South Asia, was organising the inaugaration of a project to "empower women through implementation of technology" in a nearby village.....and the village was, Jherli...just outside pilani. it was roughly 4kms aways from the campus and i had no clue how to go there...i mean i have never even set a foot outside the BITS gate. but i was determined and decided to go there no matter what.....so..at 2:30p.m on 13th feb,2006...i was gonna do something that i never had.....and set out to explore the world which was so close, yet it seemed so far all these days.
after few enquiries, i came to know that to reach there, i should not leave the CEERI wall....i mean the road by it's side will lead straight to jherli......i reached there at 3:00p.m....and lemme tell you...this one wasn't so bad...but i was quite surprised to see a village which was so long!...i just went on...on and on....finally i reached the gram panchayat office, only to find that it was locked....after few enuiries i came to know that there was someone from BITS who had come on 12th...but nobody came on 13th but they advised me to go to this guy names...jai singh who was a photographer....and also said that whenever students from BITS come to the village.....they go to his house which was on the other end of the village...when i reached there....i couldn't find any cycles....and then i met some guy who was coming from the oppiste direction of mine.....he told me that he saw a jeep passby...and that it was going to a nearby village..."Garinda" which was another 3 kms away from there.....i would say i was on a wild goose chase! i had no clue of what i was doing....i have no clue how i could to all these places all alone and that too on a sunny day....and i didn't even have water to drink! but something....something unknown kept me going...i could feel the gentle swaying of the " mustard fields"....and the mystic silence of the dried up jungle.....one of the nice things that i found in these villages was their curiousity to see a stranger going around their villages.....probably a guy wearing a red bag, specs and clothes with different shades of brown...wasn't such a common site!...:)
then i went to garinda, where a computer centre was opened in a private school only to find out that i wasn't anywhere close to my destination.....it didn't serve the whole purpose....the reason to start this journey....but what it has given me is the experience that i am not gonna forget for a long time....that cycling in the kacha road and i was wondering the whole time whether my cycle could withstand it....i mean....hello! it's not a tar road where you can just cruise at any speed....what if it got punctured! i would have walked all the way....:)......
to be ccontinued......

CONFESSIONS OF A DANGEROUS MIND!!!

2006-02-07T22:16:00.000+05:30

"Arey yaar....ek chaai dena.." i asked Pappu today in sky lawns when a thought struck me. and after sitting under that huge tree with small leaves falling on me made me think twice.....no, i am not talking about the small leaves falling into my tea cup...or the dog desperately trying to grab my attention for a small piece of the burger which i was munching with so much delight. i was wondering, why the hell am i thinking so much about all these things that have been crossing my mind since the beginning of this semester. This place, BITS has given me so much, but when I sit alone and think what exactly it is….i have no clue of what it was. May be my best gift from this place is to allow me to sit quietly and think whatever I wish to. But one thing I hate about this place is that there is no time here…..but I mean in a positive sense. It feels as if there is magic in this place…time just flies here….i still remember my first day here….i still remember my first class….my first zook….my first crush….my first confession…and the list goes on….. I have made loads of friends here and I am happy that I had spent some quality time with them. I would never forget all those screaming in the wing about VT, Quake…though I never played them…J…all those wonderful movies that we 12 guys saw together in that awesome 2nd year. Enter 3rd year….i don’t know….i mean I don’t understand about all that hype about doing your CDC’s well. May be it’s your identity, it’s like your DNA….and whatever other things that you know or like…are like other cells and organs of your body. But is it really important to prove that your DNA is stronger than others??? Check this out….my first Power Plant engineering class stands out as a perfect example why people think it’s important to do well in third year of your engineering degree. My prof said…”your mechanical engineering degree is like a digit 1…and if you are good at software field…a 0 adds by the side of 1…if you have good communication skills…another 0…if you are good at any extra-curricular activities then another 0…and the list goes on….so unless you know your core things well…the rest of the things are useless….”
Three years have left me enough moments to smile for a lifetime. One day I was out for lunch with Akki and after sometime when we went to pay the bill….i was shocked to see that we were asked to pay almost double the amount…and I asked…”wow….i didn’t know that we had to pay entertainment tax in C’not….:)..” I would never forget all those amazing chat sessions and sky latchas…. Lemme tell you about some bizarre things that I was thinking…...may be this is providence or coincidence….but I guess I believe in the number “7”…I am watching a telugu movie right now…and there are lyrics of a song…which literally translate as “there are seven colours in a rainbow…there are seven seas….and there are seven wonders in Bramha’s creation, there are seven swaras in music….and the seven hills are the abode of lord venkatesha….” After listening to this song….i found that I also belong to the same category…there are seven letters in my first name…!!!.....another thing that I believe in is….the letter “A”…..it’s in everything that I like…my parents names…...me and my bro’s name…..all my friends have this letter…”A” in their names….cinemA, chocolates, chAtting…..almost everything that I like so much.

BUT………………………………………..
In another 18 months all this is gonna end….all these that I had so much fun with….all this that was meant to be the best moments of my life are gonna vanish right infront my

CONFESSIONS OF A DANGEROUS MIND!!!

2006-02-07T22:12:00.000+05:30

eyes and I will not be able to do a god damn thing….these three years have taught me to do what you want to do and not otherwise….be it in anything. So what’s the Cache’??? I might not stand on my feet for sometime and until I find a way in the fog that is so still and dense in the future nothing is going to change. When I came here, I was so completely fascinated by software…and all the booming computer technology that India seems to be rejoicing and feeling proud that we have the best services in the world. But then, just 2 courses taught me what it takes to be able to stand in this arena….and I swore that I am not gonna touch it again. But going by the normal trend of campus recruitment…since everybody is gonna pick up guys with stronger, faster, healthier DNA….people like me are gonna pick up the rag pieces left by the so called “superiors”. Lemme just for a moment think that I am working in one such thing…(I pray sincerely that a day like that should never come)….and I wonder is this what you had dreamed of in those 4 years??...is this what you were meant to be?.....and not long after that one single thought I resist…..i resist that I cannot choke no longer in that so called “paradise” where the majority of the educated class is so dying to get into…just because it’s in one of the top most companies in the country and their CEO’s can have lunch with Bill Gates..or hire people like Vivek Paul….or have a reputation of offering some of the best training programs in the world in the first 1 year of joining the company. Not that it would matter for them….i think people rarely get ideas that change the world…..history has plenty of proof to support my thought….the plight of indigo farmers changed something in one simple lawyer and he shook the pillars of the mighty British empire…..now don’t get me wrong…..i have no intention….not even in the slightest possibility of my dream to be a “half naked Fakir”….
People wonder why should someone think so much and why can’t he do what he is supposed to do at the moment…but I fear…that it will change my life….it will change me. I donno what’s written in my pages of future….and I don’t have the fascination to know what would be there and make grand plans for it….time is a strange thing…..it runs faster than you can….though some scientist might prove me wrong that it’s not time…but something other than that!!! Yeah…where was I??....time is a strange thing….oh yeah, it is….it will never stop…it will not stop to see how a drop of rain falls from sky to the ground…..it will not stop to see how happy you are when you are talking to a friend whom you are going to miss desperately in a few days…L….i will tell you my dear fellow….i wish the time would stop when you are in some temple in south India and there’s a beautiful tamil bramhin ponnu…J….lighting a small lamp….that’s probably one of the most beautiful thing…J ….ahhhh…..i wish I was a Iyer …or Iyengar….i wouldn’t have to think so much about this thing then….:)…
I wish time stops for sometime….when I lie down and look into the sky and see a shooting star….i wanna make a wish….what it is….only the same goddamn time is gonna tell me…I guess my story which is the next post in this blog….”LIFE WITHOUT A”….tells more than just words of what I feel…I guess I have confessed more than enough in these words…time is running faster than me….(mom always says…I am fat..:)…)….whatever!....i don’t wanna miss my chocolates….movies….chatting….friends
And may be I even dedicate this to my “non-existent” girlfriends along with the above mentioned things….i don’t wanna miss my chai sessions in Sky lawns…I don’t wanna miss…..life……I don’t wanna miss……

LIFE WITHOUT A......part-1

2006-02-03T22:27:00.000+05:30

I guess i am writing something on my blog after a long time...but the journey so far has been worth it....and after a long time i have written something that i feel nice about and can tell my friends that i have written something...do read it...and your response would mean a lot to me....so here it is ....my 4th story....i hope you will all like this one.....

LIFE WITHOUT A……

“Come on move….move”, shrieked the doctor to the curious onlookers in the hospital ward. I was there at that moment wondering whether all this had to have an end like this….
“Jesus Christ! What happened?” asked an old man standing next to me. Should I tell him the truth? This was the only question lingering in my mind. Should I tell him that I let all this happen right in front of my very eyes? And I could do nothing. Nothing…..

“We will do our best, but I cannot promise you anything”, said the doc and I could tell from the very look on his face that things had gone out of hand and now everything was left to the Almighty. I sat in a corner counting every minute with my hope fainting like the sun going down into the ocean. I had so many questions in my mind and every time I try to find answers for what had happened, more questions pop up in my mind. And I closed my eyes…..
“Dad, look here what I have made for my school project…” I should tell you, my eight year old daughter was quite a gem at school. She was naughty, always getting into some kind of trouble and we had received several complaints from her teachers, but what the heck! She was my daughter and I loved her so much. That’s why I had named her Amogha and she would never cease to surprise me. I was a happy man, I should say. It was early in the spring season and flowers had just begun to blossom all over. And I had the whole day to spend the time with my family. “Dad, come here!” She was so stubborn. I went there to her room and she had made a beautiful model of a volcanic mountain to explain how it erupts. I exclaimed that it was wonderful and took her downstairs to show her the little surprise gift that I had got for her.
“A goldfish! Wow…look at it, it’s so cute.” She was so happy to see the little goldfish. We all had our lunch and I promised my little angel that I will take her for a walk. O’ boy! She loved to go out on long walks with me. She wouldn’t stop telling me about her school and friends. And I was very patient too, never shouted at her. That evening even my wife accompanied us to go out for a walk. We all went to the park and after a while sat on a bench. “Ice creams, anyone?” I asked. “Me”, said my daughter. “No beta…no ice creams in this season. You might catch cold.” Her mother warned her. But it was a mandatory thing to have for me and Amogha. Some habits never die! I somehow convinced my wife and went to the vendor to get them.
“Everybody get down….there is a prisoner on the run and he has entered the park” shouted a policeman at a bunch of people who had come to spend some time in the park. And there was panic all over. People started running helter-skelter. I think the police spotted the prisoner and began to shoot in his direction. “No!!….Amogha get down” I shouted at the top of my voice. But in that hullabaloo, she couldn’t hear a thing of what I was so desperately trying to tell her. I was just a few meters away from her and was running towards her as fast as I could. And then, she just dropped down. Just like that! She had come in the line of fire and before she knew what was happening she just….i looked around for my wife and she lay just a few meters away. I think she too….”NO!!”……I shouted….

LIFE WITHOUT A......part-2

2006-02-03T22:25:00.000+05:30

“No!!” I opened my eyes and found myself in the hospital. “What happened?” “Nothing... Just a bad dream...”
“Doctor, what happened?” his silence said more than his words could. And there she was. My beautiful wife lay peacefully on the stretcher. “Mr. Ajay, we did what we could. But it was not enough. We couldn’t help it. And your daughter, well she’s in a bad shape too. She’s taking rest now. You can talk to her after she wakes up.” The doctor placed his hand on my shoulder and said,” I am sorry. She doesn’t have much time. Maybe few hours.” And he walked away leaving me in a bewildered state. I didn’t know what to do.
I didn’t cry. I told myself not to cry because all my life I was taught that boys don’t cry! But it really is a natural thing to cry when you lose something that you love so much.
I prayed all night and hoping that the angels of death could give her a little more time than what’s destined for her. She didn’t deserve all this. For God’s sake, she was only eight years old! But ….the damn time never stops.
“Sir, sir. Are you Ajay? Your daughter….”she could barely finish what she wanted to say and I ran to the ward where my little daughter was sleeping last night hoping that my prayers would be answered. It was quite a relief to see her lying on that bed. Breathing. ...

“Dad, where am I? And what is this place? We were supposed to be in the park.” She talked as if she didn’t know what had happened. “What are all these pipes going through my hands? And why are you crying?” She always had so many questions to ask. I sat beside her and looked into her eyes. I could see the innocence in her eyes, wondering why I was crying so much and filled with questions. “Dad, where’s mom?” I didn’t know what to tell her. And I lied. “She’s waiting for you, outside this room. She couldn’t bear the sight of you lying on the bed like this. Though I forced her to come here, she didn’t listen to any of my words. She’s….gone.” Amogha couldn’t understand what I was trying to tell her. She asked,” Gone…but where?”. “She was in a hurry. Somebody was waiting for her and she couldn’t wait until you wake up. She’s….gone…she’s gone.” I couldn’t control my emotion and burst into tears. I knew that what I had lost and what I would be losing would leave only one thing for me. Loneliness…..
“She’s gone!! Tell mom that I am very angry with her. And I will not talk to her.” I think my angel was afraid and wanted her mother to be beside her. I was running out of time and suddenly was lost in thought…..
Once she got herself drenched in rain and her mom was all hot upon her. They didn’t talk to each other for quite sometime. Then my angel came to me and said,” dad, do you know why it rains?” and I said,” No, I don’t”. “It’s because the Rain God cries when his mother doesn’t talk to him.” And she smiled. Her smile was so infectious that we all started smiling too. Another time she was eating an ice-cream and by the time she finished it, the cream was all over her face. She didn’t know what to do and came and hugged me and I had a huge patch of chocolate ice-cream’s stain on my shirt. Hehehe…she really was quite gem of a person.“Dad….dad, where were you?? I have been shouting for so long” I was interrupted from my thoughts by her sweet voice. “Dad, I was wondering what will happen to our goldfish? Won’t it feel unhappy that I am not playing with it?” “Yes, my child. It will perhaps be very lonely now…..like me” I mumbled the last two words. “But I promise you that I will take full care of it.” “You are the best, dad. Ok, I am feeling very sleepy. But when I wake up I want to see my little cute friend, “goldie” here.” “Who’s goldie?” I

LIFE WITHOUT A......part-3

2006-02-03T22:19:00.000+05:30

asked her. “I just named our goldfish, goldie” and she smiled. I wondered if these were the last few things she would ever ask me for. And as soon as she slept, I ran to the house and put goldie in a cover with some water and came to the ward. I think it had taken me roughly thirty minutes to come back. And then…..
There was a small crowd of nurses and doctors outside that ward who were hurrying in and out. Somebody shouted,” She’s not breathing…she’s not breathing. Give her this injection. And put that oxygen mask on her face, for Christ’s sake.” “God…not working…not working.” And there was a long beep…..
After sometime everybody went out and I had to go inside the room. I had brought her “goldie”. She had asked for it...didn’t she? She cannot possibly go to a deep sleep. There must be some way to wake her up….there has to be some way….. I went close to her ear and whispered. “ Hey Amogha….wake up. Look goldie is here to say hello to you.” I knew that they couldn’t talk to each other. I knew she had left me alone. I knew that she had gone close to her mother. I knew that there will not be anymore walks and ice-creams. But….but I was her father…and if I had a choice, I would have chose not to believe the whole thing that had just happened. Choice, huh…it’s something that you always hope for and every time you choose something you ask yourself, was that the right thing to do? Then why have a choice at all!!!
Well, I believe that everything has got a destiny of its own. And a man does what he does until destiny finds him. I had lost my most beloved ones on the planet and people ask me how it feels like? Well, I would say look into my eyes and you will know. Look into my eyes and they will tell you what’s missing in my life. Look into my eyes and I tell you, you will forget that you had asked a question like that at all. Life wasn’t pretty much the same after they left me alone. They say it’s still the same sun and same moon. It’s still the same air and it’s still the same….blah…blah. But I ask you, is it worth it? Is it worth it when you choose to not feel anything for all these gifts that nature has for us?

Now, all that’s left for me are few photographs and loads of thoughts and images from the past. It’s so difficult to understand why you love someone so much. That morning in the hospital with my daughter had taught me something. What it is…..I still have to find out. Life passes most people by, while they are making grand plans for it. Now I force a smile on my face and try to believe that my angel is still with me. I go on long walks now….alone. I still eat my ice-creams and play with goldie. Once I had made a promise that I wouldn’t leave goldie unhappy and I couldn’t break it. You see, we still are one happy family. It’s just that I don’t see them often around. They are still there….they are still there. But…yes there’s always a but….I am living a life without A…..reason. I am living a life without A……

stAnd tAll

2005-11-15T03:03:00.000+05:30

I woke up and looked into the mirror,
and couldn't move any further.
i was just a boy last fall
today i am a man and i grew tAll.

i walked down the streeta
nd felt the morning sun on my face
something is different today..
it is suddenly something different today...

you were right there in front of me
and i was too dumb, and i was too busy reading your mind,
and could never tell you, what's in mine.
It's a funny feeling;
you have got the perfect 10 minutes with someone,
and yet you don't know what to say,
it is suddenly something different today....

I believe in destiny
I believe in ........life
Can't you see, you and me,
how beautiful life can be.

I will not breakdown, I am strong,
I will not breakdown no matter how things may go wrong.
i will....i will stand tAll...
i will....i will stand tAll...

BITS....."QUAKED"

2005-10-08T10:32:00.000+05:30

october 10th, 2005: saturday 9:25 A.M.... perhaps this date will stay in our memories for a long time becuase it was the first time most of us had witnessed an earthquake!yes...this is confirmed report that there was an eartquake here in BITS. most of us were writing our tutorials when this occured , the funny part was nobody could understand what was happening....we all thought that the guy sitting at the back was shaking the bench so much that the whole thing began to shake:)....and the people sitting in their rooms were totally confused when their comps and chairs began to shake.....anways there has been no damage anywhere....after this we come to know that the quake was felt in entire north india and in the neighboring countries pakistan, afghanistan. so far there have been no confirmed reports about the epicentre and the magnitude of the quake...probably in the next few hours from now at 10:00 am we will hear more reports.....

THOUSAND DREAMS LIKE THESE......

2005-09-25T20:52:00.000+05:30

Yesterday, i saw perhaps one of the best indian movie ever made. it didn't have any naach-gaana in the rain, or the girl-guy hitting the clubs....but there was something in it which made that impact. it was the way the story was written based on the events from 1969-1975 period during Indira Gandhi's regime that makes the difference. the movie is "hazaaron kwaishyein aisi"...which literally means "thousand wishes like these...". it definitely comes in the line of
mr and mrs Iyer which is one of my favourites.....the story of this movie revolves around 3 characters and about their work....their passion for work and to what consequences each person faces ultimately. unless u see the movie.....it's very difficult to make out what happens in the movie is right or wrong....i mean A loves B, and B loves A....C loves B but B does not love C....and A,B,C are in the same college...very good friends too.....by the way B is a girl here....:)

after their college....A decides to see the Real India....for some reason he chooses to go to Bhojpur, Bihar to spread the awareness among the villagers about the atrocities and bring about a revolution. so on day of the farewell party A+B=> AB.....:)....:)...and unfortunately C sees the whole thing....:(....after 4 years C is a big business tycoon with contacts all over the parliament...and one day he meets a guy...(i guess this character is based on Sanjay Gandhi's life...) and comes in contact with the top most echelons of the government....their first confrontation is very interesting.....and there was one particular dialouge which i would like to quote...
politician: everybody is corrupted here in India.
c: i don't agree that everybody is corrupted, but the trick is to find out who is....
there in a party C meets B....but B has married D....then we come to know that B is in regular contact with A through letters and one morning she just goes to the village in Bihar....again to have a nice time with A..(literally...to have sex with A..:)....) but somehow C manages to interrupt the holiday mood....phew...
then the whole story proceeds with lots of incidents which are the exact representation of the events which happened during emergency......somewhere in the middle of the story B leaves D and after 2 years she gives birth to a son whose father is A....but after the emergency is imposed she's arrested by the police for having connections with the notorious naxalite of the region...that's A. A is arrested too...and in the jail he's beaten up and B is raped....
the story ends in a very interesting and dramatic manner.....just everything changes.....C is almost killed by the police for helping A to escape....and A realises that he has had enough and he wants to lead a happy life and takes up medicine.....and C is almost crippled for life.....but he doesn't want to stay in a hospital, so he goes away with B who's in the same village now.....ohhhh...
seems pretty confusing huh??.....may be.....but don't miss this critically acclaimed movie......it's worth watching atleast once.....but a word of caution, if you are a fun loving guy/girl.....this movie is extremely serious.....:)....
more to come......i am just dying to see probably one of the best movies released this year...."IQBAL"

the SQUARE ONE gossip

2005-09-16T15:48:00.000+05:30

yuppie.....BOSM has started and everything seems to be rushing at the current moment. i fail to understand why they had to make it for 5 days instead of 4. anyway there are no major competitions today on the first day of BOSM....except the BITS vs IIT, kanpur match.....yesterday went to gym-g to have a look around...what's going on.....i could spot some pretty old faces too.....a guy named charan from SBMJC, bangalore.....aravind from MREC,hyd...and lot more.....though i don't remember even a single girl who has come here....but who cares......it has never been so hot out here.....(i am talking about the oomph factor!!!......:)...:)...) there are some lovely girls here who have come here to 'play' and 'cheer' up their teams....it guess it works out for everyone....hehehe.....
it was very disappointing to see that BRAC hasn't come this time...and so did SRCC.....both of them have some quality players especially in basketball....and both were semi-finalists last year. and the big surprise was that there were only 2 players in SBMJC guys team, basketball who had played last year....nevertheless i expect a gr8 competition from this amazing team....
i just hope it doesn't rain for the next 4 days...otherwise i would lose every oppurtunity to build a good team who are going to take the entire responsibilty of the club.....but i wonder sometimes most of them are too busy to realise where the whole club is exactly heading to....
that's the main reason why one has to see a leader in someone and when one gets to see that spark, he has to be well groomed and made into a fine and extremely sensible person to take on the whole world.....
yesterday i had lot of things in my mind to say to a expected crowd....but nevertheless things didn't go as expected ....the number was too small. but there were 3 most important people whom i adore out there with me throughout the night....i just hope i get more help from others...i do understand that at one point of time it looks as if i am doing the "atlas" thing with the entire club.....but is that my fault???....i just love the work so much.....otherwise how could i make so many friends out here....how could i get introduced to all thos people who respect you???.....
i just hope things go on well.....and make some amazing friends.....and may be things will start falling into place atleast by OASIS.....
more update on matches and all the masala factor to come soon.....
till then.....heeho.....main chala

BOSMANIA.......

2005-09-14T23:20:00.000+05:30

the time has come now when i look back at the amazing time i had here in BITS...especially during the festivals... BOSM and Oasis and smile at what i have gained out of it.....both of them being conducted in the same semester under different secretaries attract the major attention of almost everyone around here....
today BOSM is gonna start amidst dark clouds and heavy showers, as it always does....only that this year situation looks far more serious....but it feels lovely out here just to see rain falling everywhere....it's been so long....it's what we have been waiting for, for such a long time. i remember everytime..everyear...it rains on the inaug day but the enthu levels never die here....people trying to cheer up the home team and wondering how many medals we are gonna this time!!!
i am just waiting to see some colleges perform out here....one of them is SBMJC, bangalore. what can i say about this amazing combination of strength and excellence.....talent is abundant and they have got everything that u can ask for from a sportsman. i am just dying to see the best basetball(b) match u can ask for during BOSM....SBMJC vs BRAC (delhi)....these two teams are the titans of baski as far as my knowledge goes...last year i witnessed an unbelivable match in the leauges....BRAC was leading till the last 5 minutes when everything turned to SBMJC's favour and they won by 2 points. that was one of the most nerve wrecking matches ever.
this time we have got a special entry....IIT,kanpur. only 12 members are coming but the best part is they are gonna play basketball.....ohhhh!!!! can u imagine the electricity in the air if there's a match between
IIT vs BITS.....ppl are gonna be on high.....it would be a question of supremacy!!!!
BOSM is fun....u get to see some lovely girls walking and playing in the ground which remains empty almost throughout the year.....i just hope we win lots of matches this time.....atleast for the effort we have put in this time. more reports coming up.....

but the bottom line is....may be this is going to be my last BOSM...:(...... it's so hard to believe that the next year i may not be here.....it's so hard to believe that i am gonna miss all the fun...but life goes on.....

life is a rollercoaster....

2005-09-13T22:42:00.000+05:30

it's been a wonderful time so far this semester.....when i came here.....we were flabberghasted to listen to the number of people coming from various states and the boy-girl ratio (phew....this is one is just crazy).....almost 8:1.....can u believe that......especially for an institute which boasts that it has the highest number of women graduating every year from an university.....it was almost 40-45% for the past few years......anyways no regrets......i guess every guy should know why...:)....:)...

anyways.....things have gone pretty fine.....have met some really wonderful people this semester.....and some special people who just come into u r life...and make u r day as good as it can be....:)....it something like u are walking on a empty street with the cool breeze touching u r face and u look up at the sky and see the stars gazing at u.....and u smile at them....
yesterday i was watching a movie which had a quote that goes something like this...."when a guy looks at the girl he loves, he looks at her as if he is looking at his birthday present and he just cannot stop to open it..."....may be this is the truth....this is all what we wait for our whole lives...just to get that special look from a person whom u love..:)

lets keep this aside and get down to some serious stuff......something strange is happening to me this summer....i guess i can read the signals which my brain and heart are sending me at the same time.....something is burning inside me ....a kind of cinder which just keeps on burning.....and i have began to look at new things and start understanding about them..... for example the b-plan competitions......i had just one idea that could be made into a substantial b-plan and got an amazing team who have the potential to be the best in their respective fields...
since the time i started to think about this.....everyday a new thing crops up in my mind...and there i am in a dilemma....when should i make this happen in reality???....it's driving me crazy....and there's a sense of urgency in everything.....a zeal to learn....a zeal to outperform the rest....a zeal to be the best in what u are good at.....

things change in this wonderful place.....u make new friends.....meet some amazing people.....but the sad part is.....everytime u think about it....u are a moment closer to complete u r 4/5 years here.....that's what scares me.....they say this place teaches u to be efficient in whatever u do and wherever u are.....but i fail to understand how is this even possible at a point when u don't even understand what u are doing...????.....u are not even sure if u do something.....how will it help u???........only time has all the answers....

at the end of the day.....i just pray God to stop atleast one moment so that i can tell something to that one person whom i like very much......just give me one chance to do something this time....i have made a mistake twice....i don't want to do the same the third time....

A NEW MORNING

2005-08-08T22:04:00.000+05:30

It'a party time guys! keep the party going....
don't stop dancing, just keep your booty shaking,
party! party! party! and shake the floor,
and when it's time to stop, just keep on asking for more,

tomorrow when you wake up everything will be different,
you will be one day older than what you are at present,
the date on the calender will be gone,
and new hopes and dreams shall born.

but somethings do not change,
like the oppressed outrage,
a soldier's courage,
and a daily labourer's wage.

but something is always there in heart-hope,
"let there be peace in the world"-says the pope.
to achieve that let pray for peace within ourselves,
let the weak take care of themselves,
then they will have courage to fight,
and their lives will be brighter than sun even at night.

wake up from your sleep, this is no dream,
the world is waiting for u to gleam...
wear a smile on your face, for it's time to witness happy days.

this is a promise which God has made,
"all your worries will fade,
and you shall live happily ever after!!!!
and you shall always smile ever after!!!! "

A LIFE LESS ORDINARY

2005-08-08T21:04:00.000+05:30

Let me tell you the story of a student,
in reading and writing he is going to be fluent.
very happy he joins a school,
and soon finds out that nothing out here is cool.
after nursery, he joins class one,
and tries his best to have fun.
because he knows after that it's all maths and science,
and he will never have time to listen to his conscience.

time is always flying away,
to catch it in your hands there is no way,
so he is in a flow and joins others in what they do,
and follows them wherever they go.

when he is in PG, he forgets about CG,
and that's where he lags behind,
and there's no chance to rewind,
neverthless he looks out for a job,
his time and patience they rob,
to tell him atlast that's there's no vacancy,
and something can be done with loads of currency.

so he makes money by odd ways,
no matter how, he again joins the race.
a race to prove others that he is normal,
after sometime he tries to be more formal.
and then he advises others to follow him,
even though he knows that his desire to do something has gone dim.

and now he thinks about his own life,
and sings it in a sad tone playing a fife,
why didn't he do what he wanted to do?
why couldn't he do what he wanted to do?

the answer: may be he doesn't know what's the situation true?
he just followed people like us, like me and u,
so who's the real culprit?
who is the culprit who has silenced his grit?
on pondering all we will do is blaming each other,
and never arrive at a solution better.

so the real student would be one,
who follows his dreams no matter how wrong things have gone,
who advices others not to follow his own path,
but to leave a trail on their own path,
then no one will be same again,
because nothing similar would remain.

people will do what they do,
because they know that that's the best they could do,
and no matter how, nothing better could they do.
then there will be no question of failure,
because everyone will have a mind mature,
not to kill a killer instinct in the brain,
which is as small as a grain,
but holds the key to success,
and wisdom to assess.

such is our wonderful life,
"follow your dream and make a difference-" this is a student's life.

YOU ARE LIKE.......

2005-08-08T20:37:00.000+05:30

you are like rain in the middle of may,
sunshine on a foggy day,
you are like a glowing candle,
and have more beauty than sandal,
you are like a greeting smile from kith and kin,

the heart your i must win,
not to show others what i got,
but to THY that all odds have i fought,
and to people who have doubt,
i wanna show that all barriers i have broken,
accept me as cupid's token.

never shall i leave your hand,
we will build on he shores of sea- castles of sand,
dreams on no man's land,
i am neither a dude nor am i a dud,
i am just "me"
who promises to smile forever
share joy and happiness like a perennial river,

life is not a matter of day or two,
it's a promise of eternity and fame for few,
those who have courage, fight for it,
and he shall live for ever as a man who had strong wit,
it's only a matter of choice to choose between what u wanna be....
who's he?..........or...........who's he?

THE SONG OF JOY

2005-08-08T20:15:00.000+05:30

Listen to the song which bells sing, oh my dear,
"listen, listen! it's that time of the year,
there's smile on everyone's face,
for the time has come to see promising new days,
there's love in the air,
all this at a time, sounds rare.

the lights are glowing everywhere,
showing that there's nothing to fear,
He has come to earth once again,
and He will remain here forever remain.
to fill a lost feeling in every soul,
that in life we have a very important role,
to love others as you have never loved them before,
to care for others as if you have never done it before.

i wanted to say all this to you,
and show you a beautiful night's view,
i couldn't, so i chose Santa to tell you,
on my behalf, may all your dreams come true,
let there be smile on your face,
let there be like these more gleeful days,
listen to those far and near,
they all sing "happy new year" "

THE DAY AFTER FEW SMILES

2005-08-08T18:09:00.000+05:30

I was so happy on your birthday and i thought the day was mine,
of war and terror there was no sign,
then all of a sudden, you gave us a massive "nine",
and that destroyed everything that was fine.

the huge wave triggered by the massive quake,
something that can devasation make,
and millons of life in a second that could take
away with it, with all lives at stake.

a flourishing market turned into a grave,
and there was little left to save,
anly they survived who were brave,
and others were left for their little ones to crave,

everything happened in an instant, i thought i was dreaming,
but it all happened under the sunday sun that was gleaming,
and you will have a long queue outside your paradise,
because we believe that we will see you after demise.

you are only a belief among us, because nobody has seen you,
and very few are left down here who can tell us what's true,
all we wanted is few smiles and tears for the new year
an you gave us more reasons to fear,
but wait! why am i blaming you for all devastation?
am i responsible for destruction?

few say it might be due to mining and drilling,
and the fragile environment that we are harming,
has given us a good reply,
and may be this will cause for more sincere efforts to apply,
to protect mother nature, promising a better future.

all i ask you is give us some more time,
before a devastation like this could rhyme.
because no one would be left to shed tears,
and there will be fear and panic in coming years.

please save us from your wrath,
i promise that there will be and we shall share love and warmth,
we will live like brothers and take good care of others
this is all i ask you,
please protect us and help us to mke our dreams come true.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2005-08-08T17:47:00.000+05:30

Look at the sun, it's so special today,
shining brightly, it smiles "happy birthday"

hear to the birds chirping among themselves,
looks like they are aiting for you to come out.
beacuse they have come to see you and no one else
and sing "happy birthday" in chorus.

perhaps the air also seems to know about you,
that's why there's fragrance all over when you walk,
and the world seems to be more sweet when you talk.

i guess it should be a busy day for your mobile ,
giving you no time to dial ,
to your friends , because they would be the first to wish you.
no wonder such people are always few.

nothing is more sweet and cut than your smile,
looks like world is a heaven for a little while
wishing you a thousand more smiles on your birthday,
have a wonderful day and wishing a great day to be as special as you are.

SOMETIMES

2005-08-08T17:32:00.000+05:30

may be there have been lot of stories told,
yet there are many feelings to unfold.

sometimes i wish , i was more than a friend to her
sometimes i wish i could more to her.

the scene was perfect, and the stars were glowing bright,
yet i missed the chance and couldn't do things right.
we think silence is gold and speech is silver,
but long before i realised that talking is clever,
the wind had blown away the precious little thing,
and there was brightness all over.

i thought i was about to lock myself in a dark room,
till a gabriel came and told me "there is still hope".
i knew i couldn't remove brightness,
to make my own road, but i kinda forged,
an unseen pact ro live in harmony.

sometimes i wish i should have expressed myself before it was late,
yet nature seems to like people like me,
hence it opened doors plenty or me to see,
i was gifted with a vision to see beauty,
yet i sometimes feel lonely.......so incomplete,

sometimes i wish i could cry with my head on your lap,
and then not my words but tears shall speak the truth,
that i will be always there for you,
and it's not a matter of day or two,
but i shall love you for time infinite,
i will be always there for you like the stars and moon in the night,
and shall always care for you though i am out of sight.

sometimes......someday i hope you will realise the truth,
and smiled that there ever existed a thing like this on earth.

THOSE DAYS

2005-08-08T17:17:00.000+05:30

you seem to be like a piece from heaven,
it's time for our love to be woven,

walking with you down the meadow,
i followed you like a shadow,
i walked down the street
to see how me you treat?

i was dying to see you all day hence,
i waited across the fence,
your face , i craved to look,
precious hours of my life all it took.

everyone says i am a hunk,
but when i saw you my courage sank.

now you are like a socket
drawing all bucks from my pocket

i remember loving your beautiful face,
i cannot forget all those days
don't push me into a ditch
don't caste a spell on me like a witch.

at me even if you laugh,
deep down the heart you know that a guy i am to be proud of.

LIVE YOUR LIFE

2005-08-08T16:22:00.000+05:30

I wanna hold your hand,
and show you a world grand.
i wanna walk along with you
and show you things few.

look at the sun,it says something to us,
quoting it as radiation we make a big fuss.

look at the moon and stars, they show something to us
terming science and maths we discard them as nothing.

i thing it's the way God sees us,
and if something miraculous happens
we term it as a sign of Armageddon- Judgement day.
this is beacuse we have not come out of the fray.
a fray which goes on and on within us
to know who ou are , to know why you are here?

it's so simple yet difficult to understand,
between you and me there's only subtle bondage strand.

let's pray that we shall forever live here,
and live without any fear,
fear of dying someday,
beacuse we will reach Him anyway....

I WANNA FEEL

2005-06-12T15:35:00.000+05:30

I wanna feel the day and the sun,
I wanna feel the night and the moon,
i wanna feel....my life.

i am yet to see the day,
which the world spends without fray.
I am like a man who would wait for warmth
where there's no sun.
and the wind doesn't let anything to glow.

maybe it's notthe wind,
but a feeling from behind,
behind from the past....behind from the legend..
that nothing should change....
and that there's always an anamoly that exists..
which balances every force that resists..

why should anything change?
they say it's not about a day or night, but a gradual change.
i guess i wanna feel that change...
i wanna see that change.

i wanna feel the touch of a soul,
whop would explain about what's happening around,
i wanna feel the air which blows on me with gentle care,
i wanna feel the voices that glance at mje.
i wanna feel someone who's crying to break free...
i wanna feel me.....me....me.....

Is it joy or fantasy?

2005-06-05T20:57:00.000+05:30

i am in a different world now...
i am in a strange land now...
it feels like a fantasy land...
it feels like a amazing land...

Life is so beautiful...
life is so colourful...
yet, there's something missing!

i donno know if it's my brain or heart hissing...
but i know...i am lost now...
yeah...yeah i am lost now...
always looking at something
that would reflect at my identity...

i see my reflection in the mirror...
and laught at myself...
who's this? who have i become?

i didn't want to be like this,
i didn't want to be someone that i am not...

yet something has changed now....
no...everything has changed...and is changing...

i am lost....i am lost.
i am lost to find the meaning,
i am lost to find the strange feeling,
i am lost to find the strange land i had been dreaming,

yet it feels so good....good to look at god's creation...
and smile at his beautiful creation...
i don't wanna miss this....i don't wanna go away....

(if u r wondering what i have written about......it's just what passed through my mind in a shopping mall..:):)..)

LIFE GOES ON.....

2005-06-05T20:46:00.000+05:30

They come and they go...
i doubt whether they got what they had come for?
it feels so empty.....it feels so dark.
there's always a search for enlightment..
there's always a fight for betterment...

Then...there i think i saw it...my life.
and it vanished before i could feel it..
there's so much to do...
there's so much to go through...

Why doesn't time stop for a moment?
just a moment to set all things right....
to see which direction is the one right...

Perhaps, then there would be no meaning of chaos,
it's how our lives are....
and the best thing is we like it that way...
we like to be in a fray with ourselves...

At the end of the day it feels like...
it was just another day...
it's gonna be just another night..
no one expects to see the end...
but it's something they always fear...

i wonder what if life had come to an end..
amd start over all again...
funny....isn't it?

may be somethings always go on....
somethings always grow on....
and maybe life is just another thing among them...

As they say"It's your life...make it large"
Perhaps you gotta live it to tell about it.....
and life goes on and on and on.....

FLY AWAY HOME

2005-05-10T12:46:00.000+05:30

It's been so long,
yet it feels like time has gone by like a song.

It's been so long,
since i have been to the place where I belong.

It's been so long,
and most of the times things have gone wrong.

It's been ages since I smiled like a child,
earlier everything around me was placid and mild,
and now things have changed so much,
that i feel like i am just another moron of the bunch

There's no reason.....there's no meaning
my mind is just aimlesslesy roaming.

I wanna fly away home,
and sleep on the lap of my mom,
I wanna fly away home,
I wanna fly away home....

It's a matter of 2 days,
it's a matter of who's gonna win the race,
I guess life goes on like this,
things are gonna continue like this....

It's the same sun everywhere,
but never the same fun everywhere...
Life here just sways like the wind,
all the time pushing us from behind...

Life goes on and i wanna break free...
life goes on and i wanna fly away home....

DOWN WITH FEAR

2005-05-07T17:34:00.000+05:30

I walk on a lonely road,
trying to figure out what exactly is a "load".

I walk on the lonely road,
trying to see some decent marks on the board.

I walk on the lonely road,
trying to figure out what happens near a "node".

Is this my "reluctance" ?
or delay in proper "reactance" ?
there's a subtle foil,
which blinds me to know more about a "coil"...

what exactly is this?
what exactly is this crisis?
I am six steps away from being grounded,
I am six days away from being screwed,
and i am thinking,
may be there's some hope blinking...

it's not about what i am gonna make.....
though a 'C' would be like icing on the cake.
what do i need now?
i need to figure out how?

all i need to do is....stand tall,
and save myself from a steep fall...

I am down with fear,
Oh Heavens!!! look down here,
i am crying but my tears are dry,
something always keeps my spirits high....

I am down with fear,
why isn't my future clear?
I am down with fear,
Please help me God....Oh my dear..

i am down with fear,
i am down with fear.....

ONE LAST CHANCE

2005-05-06T23:56:00.000+05:30

As I at my life take a glance,
i find all the while i was craving for one last chance.

one last chance was all i had asked for,
and promised to do well in my sem four.

one last chance was all i had asked for,
and things became complicated more.

i made promises many,
and couldn't keep any
i knew deep down i was sinking,
but i thought there was hope somewhere still winking

and now 6 days is all i have,
6 days of test to see if i am brave
6 days to see my growth
6 days to see the truth.

and here i am sitting and expecting to see a miracle.
and waiting to see if within me, the sparks crackle
i look upto the stars and say i got plenty of things to tackle
and they smile back at me with a sparkle

one last chance is all i have,
and i am thinking if there's anyway i could myself save
one last chance......one last chance